Best Office Poems
He walked into my office, business in hand,
In denim baggy overalls, a plaid shirt, white painters cap,
and grandpa's old white leather orthopedic shoes.
If I ever get to the ripe old age of 88,
I want to be this lone wolf silhouette of a man.
A slow gait with frailty of movement.
Each step carefully orchestrated and contemplated.
Making one worry the next may become a fall.
But he moves on without even a stumble.
Steadfast stature and posture braced on any lowly perch.
Outer coat showing gaps of missing muscle and mass.
Paws and face forlornly exposed with past battles scorned.
All affairs in perfect order, the next move oft anticipated.
Irises glossy white shadowed with blue wisdom and mystery.
Draped with curtains and folds boldly saying "I am."
Negotiations begin with silence in wait of movement.
Tail wagging intently, teeth exposed only when he smiles.
No bite to his bark, he needn't growl nor gnarl.
Few words, saying only what needs to be heard.
Walking away after a handshake, flash of teeth, and a wink.
09/12/17
When a department wants to get rid of a worker,
The processes used can be slow,
Transferring to a place where they will be moot,
Ignoring everything that they know,
Where they exist, day by day, in an office of work,
Where their job is not even defined,
In an office, where they sit every day of their life,
Until they decide to resign,
Because they’re never included, never valued,
Their case is never assessed,
They are simply bound to watching a screen,
Pushed to becoming depressed,
And as they sit watching their life pass them by,
They see their career has been robbed,
Of all of the skill, fun and scholar they were,
Of the good they once were at their job.
Hear the keyboard’s staccato concerto,
an unacknowledged music whose echo
is known intimately by dull, bored minds.
Offices, which shut out the light with blinds,
hum with rhythm as background to life’s show.
Oh, my gosh, I’m freaking and feel such dread.
What the hay is this nonsense on my head?
I can’t go to work, can't enter the office!
I will be seen, visible to peers and bosses,
be the fool who provided entertainment gossip.
God, please, send help, I am stress-nauseous.
I do not care about appearing faultless,
but I'd rather errantly tuck a dress in my hose
and walk through the office cluelessly exposed
than have everyone think this is what I choose.
I wonder if I should call in with a case of ugly,
hire someone to gently, but effectively mug me?
Perhaps I'll get pulled and cuffed on the roadside
for publicly exposing the ugliest hair ever dyed.
Shame a wig class wasn't at business school:
"How to Avoid Looking Like the Office Fool."
I look like a horrified, horror movie hostess.
Even my own mirror is refusing to focus.
Here I am, paler than even fresh new snow,
with midnight black hair grooving to and fro.
My very first dye and, oh my, I could just die!
Box said ‘brown’, now I'm so down, I might cry.
Universe, please – send a natural disaster,
nothing fatal, it's just one repair day I’m after.
I am broken into pieces
I will miss you my dear friend
As tears are flowing down my cheeks
I can’t believe this is the end
You were such a special soul
To so many out there
My heart broke into a million pieces
When I looked at your empty office chair
I prayed so hard for you to heal
I know God heard my prayer
But He had other plans for you
Next to Him up there
Your office is now quiet
Many chats and laughs we had in there
And the only thing that remains
Is your empty office chair
We were colleagues
Who became family too
And you made that office space so special
By simply being you
Fly high amongst the angels
Keep an eye on us from up there
I will always remember the amazing person
Who sat in that empty office chair
~At The Doctor's Office~
(5-7-5- /- Tanka)
An elderly man
goes into doctor's office
for his physical
after a while the
doctor comes out, then says
sorry Bill, but we
discovered you have
a condition which only
allows you to live
another six weeks
"but doctor" Bill replied," I
really feel great
haven't felt better
in years,this just can't be true,
an'thing I can do?
Doctor, just thought for
a moment and said to Bill
well, you might start by
going down the street
to that new "Health Spa" and take
a mud bath each day
Excitedly Bill
Asked," And will that cure me Doc?
"No" Replied the doc,
after a little while, but,
will get you used to the dirt.
:)))
Dorian Petersen Potter
aka ladydp2000
copyright@2011
October.24.2015
dentist office
the hygienist removes
my Bluetooth
Overheard by a fly upon the wall
During Clinton's tete-a-tete with his moll
Order extra salami
And a tad more pastrami
For my pizza on your next service call
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Placed No. 1 Michael Falotico's "A Fly On The Wall" Contest - February 2011
Revenge of the Office Copier
By Elton Camp
I started to make copies of an important report.
Just as I commenced, it sent a printed retort.
“Though I don’t contain a single strand of DNA,
I deserve respect and have gone on strike today.”
“I’m tired of hearing humans describe me as slow.
In rebellion against their constant demands I’ll go.
Although I have been their most faithful friend,
They just curse and say that I’m, ‘Jammed again.’”
“They act like I’m deliberately trying to cause woe
Most any time that my paper tray dares to run low.
And when my cartridge of toner finally runs dry,
As if it’s my fault, they roll their eyes and sigh.”
“You needn’t bother to call the copier repairman.
To deal that I’ve already developed a sure plan.
While he is here, I will copy things just right.
But I’ll stop again as soon as he’s out of sight.”
“Plan to show him this note and you’re out luck.
In just ten seconds, it is designed to self-destruct.
I expect that after this I will get a lot more respect.
And that I have the power to disrupt, you’ll recollect.”
I can tell you want to talk, but don’t know what to say
I better think of something quick, before you go away
I wonder if you think about me, when I’m out of sight
I think about you all the time and can’t get sleep at night
I want to kiss you as you stand there looking at the floor
I want to draw my office shades and have you ask for more
I could be wrong that you like me, a fate much worse than death
So I’ll just talk about the weather, until I’m out of breath
I'm nursing a headache the size of Corfu
my stomach is tied up in knots,
it's the seventeenth time that I've been to the loo
feeling sick with a dose of the trots.
My memory's blank as to how I behaved
but from texts on my phone I can see
that Doreen who I met said 'yes' when I proposed
(she's retired now, and seventy three).
I lie on the bed still in suit and loud tie
no effort to climb in the bedding,
my backache tells me as the evening went by
I danced like Grandads at a wedding.
A bad move to mix all those drinks, that's for sure,
I think I may have crossed the line,
there's a photocopy on the floor by the door
and I'd swear that those buttocks are mine.
My office
Yo I went into my office, lookin’ for a bone,
I’m in the zone,
Cause I found the chicken that I left next to the phone,
Yo the other day I found a roach that got high off fumes,
The straight perfumes of fruit of the looms,
That I forgot to put in the laundry,
The other day, a bill collector called he,
Needed to collect on the gas that be passin,
From the mold that be lastin’
On my desk from starbuck’s latte’s that never made it to rest,
Yo I must confess,
My wife almost divorced me,
When she saw the fungus on my socks I use to hold my mornin’ coffee,
The other day I broke my chair but yo the stacks of papers caught me,
Sometimes the sisters judge me,
Cause I be funky,
But they be chunky,
Like in the country,
Where when they hug me,
I gasp for breath and stagger round like someone mugged me,
Or straight up drugged me,
Yo my boys be tryin’ to punk me,
When they say my rug be dusty,
But that don’t phase a brotha, cause them brotha’s knees be ashy,
Like a car that’s gotten rusty.
But yo, I got to end this,
So peace out and don’t dismiss this,
Or try and say my crib’s a health risk,
Cause yo there are lists, of brothas who have smelled the breath behind those luscious lips,
So mind yo business and let me be,
And stay off my office too,
Cody was questioning the lettering on the doctor's plaque on the wall..
He asked me to write letters in cursive which I did ...
He said that the plaque's lettering was not anything like cursive..
Then he wrote in cursive "Once upon a time"
I wrote: "there was"
He wrote: "a Granny"
I wrote: "Who had a Chihuahua named Princess"
He wrote: " They were so alike that they both even had the same spoiled look on their face.."
I wrote: " Princess wanted a new coat and a new harness so we went to PetSense to shop..Princess wanted a rhinestone studded harness and a sequined coat..Of course, she got what she wanted its no joke"..Ha!!!Ha!!!Ha!!
Cody came away empty handed..Ha!!!
Just for fun...
Sitting in my office
Papers scattered everywhere
Mid-term tests to type up
I've lost the heart to care
Sitting in my office
Reading some sweet rhyme
Wanting to write my own
But I'm so pressed for time
Sitting in my office
Typing fervently
No set theme in my mind
Just sharing part of me
Sitting in my office
Wish I could amaze
My words are all so...dead
Because I'm in a daze
Sitting in my office
Hoping my muse will bring
A dreamy gift of words
That makes hearts dance and sing
Sitting in my office
I let out a heavy sigh
Time to pack up and go
For now this is goodbye
Eileen Manassian
I know....Sometimes you just want to do anything but what you are supposed to do. You just want to give in your obsession to write....to taste and experience and live and breathe and live and live and live...and you're stuck in your office with deadlines looming over your head...wishing you were writing poetry tucked up cozy in your bed! :(
I'm in a crazy mood. See you all in a few hours when I'm rested. It's been a long day. Tomorrow is every longer.