Best Nun Poems
SHE WANTED TO BE A NUN
After graduating from eighth grade,
She wanted to be part of the novitiate,
of the Holy Sisters of Nazareth.
Dad put his foot down loud and hard.
How she went from that, to nurse,to
teacher ,to comedian and bellydancer?
Are eternal questions to which she just
cannot find any answers!
Who knows what her zany future may
bring?
A palace, a Mercedes? Better yet.
perchance a loving, handsome king?
She has no unicorns of fairies dancing
in her house.
They are all on vacation now~so the
poet's only companion is a cheese-loving,
visiting field mouse!
November 15, 2019
Sister, sister sitting there so sweet
Looking so virtuous, acting discreet.
Any male would eagerly bow at your feet
You have no idea of your allure, you're without conceit
Are you offering up a trick or a treat?
Only then will this Halloween finally be complete
Ready your answers to God when you do meet
For nuns of your stature are becoming obsolete!
For my girlfriend who dressed up as a sexy nun.
Even though
It was so long ago
It still holds the place in my heart
The one I reserved for special moments
with him
The times before his health
got the best of our relationship
Back when my grandpa
was able to be my
grandpa
It was my first parade
and one of his last
The Halloween of
2006.
There was
tigers
and lions
and bear
oh my.
but there was also the usual
witches, and monsters
but most importantly
there was my grandpa.
He volunteered to help
with the small monsters
of classroom 301 that year
which would also be his last
so he was able to walk with his
even if he kept stopping
to pick up candy
along the way.
walking with him
along the crowded streets
past the sirens of the firetrucks
and over the steep hills
will forever beat any memory
of
trick or treating
passing out candy
or the endless Halloween parties
for that was just a moment to enjoy
now that his old age has hit him
hard
there's no more walking
no more dressing up for Halloween
just to see a smile on the face of
his grandchildren
his little monsters
That moment will forever hold my heart
ten years ago was
the last time
this witch
had her
nun
of a grandfather
walk beside her
Two Nuns travel through Europe by car
Guided by the heavens North Star
Transylvania they reach
Hymn singing they preach
Not realizing they have come so far
At a busy junction they now stop
The red light is about to colour swap
Then out of the night
A most scaring sight
Onto their bonnet Dracula did drop
Sister Francine to Sister Helen said
On with the wipers, off with his head
Darn, that never worked
On this darkly toothed berk
He's hanging on, foot down, of they sped
What shall I do, Sister Francine says
Sister Helen shouts, window wiper spray
At the Vatican I filled
It's heavenly chilled
This time he's sure to go away
The Holy Water now having been yield
Has the demons fate now been sealed
To rid of this dross
Please show him your cross
Get the **** off the windshield!
~*~ This piece has been turned into a Limerick from a joke doing the rounds ~*~
A flamenco dancer in Spain
encountered a nun in the rain.
He shouted,' Olé.'
Her fingers astray,
she grunted, 'I'm coming again.'
Just some silliness, written today for Andrea's limerick contest
NUN FUN IN THE SUN
There was in hot Tashkent in the orient
A religious uprising - a convent dissent.
Army was ordered in with gunnery,
The soldiers targeted the nunnery.
Here are the events in vista:
One lovely sista was forbidden a mista,
But a certain young soldier kissed her
Unaware of the portents
For the jewel of the convent’s contents.
In her cell he wanted his love to foister.
(She had made his cloister moister.)
His inclination was to osculate ;
The incident threatened to escalate.
Her kiss made him forget his gun,
Which overheated in the sun.
The magazine cooked until done,
Then bang, their love was gone.
veils escape the province of the sea
like sea lions bouncing balls
presenting their accoutrements.
the silken fare, in the center of the square -
everyone sees the princely dyes.
off to the side, a nun, on her knees
tying shoes, wiping tears with her scapular,
the forlorn child formless and empty, like the earth
in the beginning, until God said, “Let there be light.”
Dorothea, a gift of God, reveals that glory
unseen, untouched by the ladies of the night.
the child swaddled in the nun’s habit, like an embryo -
she hears the mothering heartbeat — as if the ocean,
clear as glass, showed off its icons broadway style.
the child overwhelmed, has no name
for the empirical pounding in her chest.
Sister David they would call her in the penguin house,
a woman after God’s heart, but Dorothea herself
made the covenant.
the veils like clouds swirl all around
in a seaside mist, the dustbowl urn,
“ashes to ashes, dust to dust,”
her mother’s breasts like a harbor
to the seamen, so many of them —
did her father arrive with the rest?
she would never know,
but of this she did — this gift of God
looked into her spindly eyes, made
her habit a boat that sailed far far away
to an island that would shine all day.
children of the silken winds,
battered by retreating shore
found solace together, overrun
by the habits of nuns, with
hands that soothe and discipline,
teach that the flipside of the beach
has warmth and a perfect soulmate.
Be she a fiddler, a thief, or kind —
Dorothea has saved girls’ lives.
5/19/2020
NUN POETRY CONTEST
Sponsor: Julia Ward
One day, She looked and saw what I done
For tomorrow is fine, now I’ll follow the Nun
She caught me acting up and having fun
She gave me detention, so I’ll follow the Nun
And now the time has come, to detention I’ll go
I will get a concussion and my poor rear end will hurt so
One day you’ll find that it’s no fun
When you stay after school and have to follow the Nun
And now the time has come, to detention I’ll go
I have a sore rear end, when I sit I hurt so, oh
One day, you’ll stay, and wait until I’m done
You can go home now cause today, I’ll follow the Nun
Beatles tune, "Follow The Sun"
For John's contest
There once was a Nun and a Druid
Exchanging some bodily fluid,
When along strode the Father
Who heard all the bother,
Lost stickum while coming unglu..ed.
A young Monk was feeling inferior,
and so with a motive ulterior,
the Monk and a Nun,
did what they shouldna done
and it made her a "Mother Superior"!
Sister Josephine, our neighborhood nun.
No longer fit for ministry;
although she’s quit the nunnery,
she sits at our day camp nursery.
Go Jo uses every amp of energy
so as to champion or otherwise dampen
the spirit of grit in our scamps.
Sister Josephine, power shavers couldn’t stun.
Noise is born in my son.
Enjoying his horn on the run
from morn till night with the sun,
Boy Roy is fun, delightfully won.
Toys are Sprite cans, squiggly egg whites,
old cobs of corn and badly worn kites.
Sister Josephine, our savior you’d want.
Nursing their aches and their sprains,
reversing the stakes in their games,
she takes on blessing their brains.
Interspersed with pain, her tests will train,
coerce and arrest their thoughts with some stress.
Her heart makes and breaks their quests.
Sister Josephine showers favors - on good done.
Rhyming Words:
Stanza one:
no, although, Go, Jo, so
fit, quit, sits, spirit, grit
ministry, nunnery, nursery, every, energy
camp, amp, champion, dampen, scamps
Stanza two:
noise, enjoying, Boy, Roy, toys
born, horn, morn, corn, worn
son, run, sun, fun, won
night, delight, Sprite, whites, kites
Stanza three:
nursing, reversing, inter/spersed, coerce
aches, stakes, takes, makes, breaks
sprains, games, brains, pain, train
blessing, tests, arrest, stress, quests
Random rhymes in the the single lines:
our, power, showers
(neighborhood), (shavers could), (savior you'd), (favors/good)
nun, stun, want, done
"In twenty four hours" after "dancing with the devil"
Begins the "lifting of my veil" you'll see I'm totally being level
"Silence is golden" was snickered when "my confession" was read
Head nun said, "look before you leap" but yet I ended up "in his bed"
Filled full of "tainted love" and "torment" that was "beyond belief"
Being a "sexy nun" I was "mystified", now full of "regret" and grief
If "Falsely imprisoned", I fear that I'll be "out of sight, out of mind"
I must "get it together" or else my "guardian angels" will leave me behind
"Choosing your fate" was taught in the convent, but I missed class that day
Swayed by a "roller coaster" of "sparkling kisses", that sadly led me astray
I'm "no longer asking" for these "false charms begone" on my behalf.
But for my other personality "Betty Boop", to be "freed", she is my other half.
~ Cecilia Macfarlane
~ 8/22/2013
Orginally for contest: 'It's all in the Titles' contest. Using 10 or more of your own poem titles to create a poem
Now for the "Take Two" Poetry Contest of Nette Onclaud
Chistu uaglione 'nquiet che guard luntano e aspett...
sta c'ercan chella femmena sincera che tut
e pene fa frni: quanno a speranza nun s' trova;
bella uagliona, a chi staje asptann chesta sera?
T' poss fa' cumpagnia e ferma' a paura toia?
L'ammore amaro nun divent maje doce,
cchiu' zucchero s' mett, cchiu nun ha sapore!
L'ammore amaro nun divent maje doce...
quanno tut a tristezza rimane dint o' core!
Chistu uaglione 'nquiet aspet a nott pe' vede a luna,
e cammin pe cheste strade silenziose senz a paura;
chistu bel uaglione chiagne comme e sciur ro' mattin...
cercame, t' aspett cantand e suonand o' mandolin!
L'ammore amaro nun divent maje doce,
chello che voglio e' scennere da chesta croce
e cumincia' a vivr cu tant sole e ammore;
si staje vicin, famme s'nti sta' bella voce!
Translation:
This restless young man looks afar and waits;
what he wishes for is a sincere woman
who can take his misery away and ease all pain
when hope is not found on dark, silent roads;
beautiful girl, who are you waiting for tonight?
Could I keep you company to end your fright?
Bitter love can never turn sweet,
the more sugar you pour in your cup,
the more it loses its wonderful taste;
bitter love can never turn sweet...
when all bitterness shows up
and makes sweetness leave in haste!
This handsome guy waits for darkness and walking
on dark and silent streets, he seeks the dawn...
to cry like flowers towards bright morning;
sweetheart, I'll wait and sing and play the mandolin!
Bitter love can never turn sweet,
my wish is to stop this hopelessness
and start living with a lot of sun
and love whenever life lets me down!
Bitter love can never turn sweet...
all I like to hear is your voice of tenderness!
Written on 4/5/017
Beautiful Linda became a nun,
prayed in the Chapel forgiving John
who swore her faithfulness
with very solemn words...
she did not know that he was a con!