Best Comedian Poems
Filled up with quips like a clanking balloon
blown up with coins not with air
Clittering, clatter on golden paved streets
his winsome words, plenty to share
Brilliant performance, he's taking his bow
on a bed of burnt peacock feathers
The skycap he wears filled with holes and with tears
has protected him well from the weather
The crowd gangly gathers with popcorn and fruit
with the wish and the will just to laugh
He juggles emotions with unending devotion
and doubles his jokes up by half
By the end of the night the whole room is alight
with marshmallow bellies still shaking
From the butt of all jokes to a friend of all folks
he's a super star right in the making...
Caerphilly is a small town
Famous for its cheese
Has a castle looks like its falling down
With a Moat around with geese
Outside now stands a large Statue,
It needed to be big he would boast.
Thats what the nature of this man
Big, but stupid loved by most
Its a statue of Tommy Cooper
Comedian a magician that fails
Wore a Fez as his trademark
Born here in Wales
The sculptors name is James Done
A great friend of mine
Has a wicked sense of humour
Smiling all the time
Jim isnt Welsh boohoo
Though he's lived here a long time
Regards himself as proxy Welsh
Though his accent sounds like Tyne
The day Tommy's statue was presented
Was done by Sir Anthony Hopkins no less
Who mentioned he would have loved
To have met Tommy in the flesh
Now it stands there for all to see
The larger than life comedian
Well done Jim your Bronze is f.c.
Can even be seen in *Torfaen"
The link goes directly to the Tommy Cooper site showing pictures of the statues. Mentioning James Done the sculptor.
Torfaen (torfine) is an area next to Caerphilly
f.c. First class
http://www.thetommycoopersociety.org/statue.aspx
Dated 23 January 2013
She's the funniest comedian who doesn't
make jokes
But always there as a clown
Her words are like golden Crown
When your mouth is closed with pains
sHe shall be there to open it with Gains
She's the same comedian
who will kiss you in front of your friends
Have you ever heard about the Puppy in
the neighborhood?
>>>Yes that is you<<<
You are Mummy favourite Pet
Always there to feed your little tummy
Hollywood’s Lucille Ball, loved by many,
had an enormously profound effect on me.
She was funny and kind and goofy,
and so wonderful, she lit up my 1960’s TV.
My favorite show of hundreds of thousands
is of her and Ethel making candy.
Until Carol Burnett came along, I thought a funnier
woman could never be.
This gorgeous entertainer will probably never
know the enormous effect she has on me still today.
Many an evening I laugh until I cry at her
funny antics on my TV, I love to watch her play.
Echo world behind the glass,
I make the same faces I did at twelve.
The grinning Cheshire Cat
with teeth like piano keys,
mendacious and coy
because viewing my portrait with sobriety
forces me to march with familiar frailties.
I’m certain my gravitas is a forgery.
I am sure my laments and torments are
playacted animation.
Their drama is loathsome.
Instead, I turn my left eye toward my nose
while keeping the right straight.
This contortion masks multiple blemishes.
I summon my childhood buffoon, making
self-mockery hide all my impairments.
Concealing them by exposing them,
I become the object of my own joke.
What guise can be greater?
I am Charlie Chaplin getting kicked in the rear.
I am Soupy Sales hit by a sloppy pie.
With this impression, I never need to try.
Flashbacks on the wall.
They all die like Curly Howard.
Laughter is short-lived glee,
after which the spirit secretly craves.
My life is made of printed images
on a carnival tent.
Memory fragments are all I hold,
each enlisting some particle of my journey.
Yet with this, I find another way to fit into
a clown car,
another way to do my pratfalls,
another way to get my pants pulled down.
Accepted for publication: The Opiate, Spring 2024
TRIBUTE TO A COMEDIAN
Even with your witty strength
The little input of the labor
Of your mouth making the living
Smile away sorrow through jest of jaw,
As you sleep for too long today,
Wondering if there will ever be
Another dawn for you to sneeze
And squint your eyelids as
One gulping a cup full of reddish
Cameroon pepper during harmattan
Good to say goodnight as the sleep deepens
Though your name not boldly engraved
In the hearts of many, as the giant in you
Earlier slept off before you also
Joined to sleep and never to wake up anymore
A poem written by Uche ken Okologo. 4/30/2013
Robin Williams,
one of Chicago’s native civilians.
Became the best comedian in the late seventies,
poor man died from depression’s disease.
Known for his “hyper-comedy”,
Hook, Patch Adams and Jumanji-
though delirious,
can be serious,
like Dead Poet’s Society.
Forever loved, a man nobody hated,
a new world of comedy he created!
I bet he’s above full of love and laughter;
embracing an “Awakening” in the everafter.
September 22, 2019
Clerimerick Couplets (Hybrid Form) Poetry Contest
Mark Toney
bare ash trees
shiver in the breeze
oak tree laughs
. \ \/ \/ /
\ \ / / ___/
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/ \ \/ / \
\ /
l l
l l
l l
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jan has a plan ~ humor the renaissance man
Tease a friend poetry contest
Sponsored by Bobby May
January 7, 2021
All the way from Ontario to Hollywood,
was one of the greatest comedians to live.
On a small stage at Second City he stood,
making the world laugh was all he could give.
Held his head up high with his pants too tight,
but I sure loved watching HBO on Friday night.
Was it hard being Barf in Spaceballs by Brooks?
I bet being Uncle Buck was rough on the kids-
The best part about his comedy is how he hooks
you in like fishing line when poor weather forbids.
Del Griffith and Neal Page spend time in automobiles,
planes, trains and cars with barely any wheels!
John Candy was more than what the eye met
and-
I’ll never forget my favorite character Chet!
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*15 lines total in this poem
*Movie references: 1.) Spaceballs (Barf) 2.) Uncle Buck (Buck Russell) 3.) Planes, Trains and Automobiles (Del Griffith 4.) The Great Outdoors (Chester “Chet” Ripley)
Date: September 10, 2019
MY UPCOMING BIRTHDAY (09-03) CELEBRITY
Any Form Cash Prize Poetry Contest
Sponsor: William Kekaula
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They unpacked the deck of cards
Counted and took out some cards
Extra care made them to recount
A strange card again out of game.
They shuffled the cards
And started their game
All face cards were looking decent
To become the part of game.
A funny face card
You may called careless fellow
Was lying inside the pack
As faithful husband in bed.
All 52 cards role he played very well
But nobody gave him a unique id
Everyone got desire result by him
But no credits gave him as joker.
There's no respect for joker
Who was sacrificed his identity
So that gentlemen could play
Their games to enjoy life party.
A funny character to entertain you
Burning heart but tried to laugh with you
All stories are written around the hero
Because nobody likes Mr. Zero.
Don't know whether
This is true or not
But i heard it through the grapevine
That i am the Taliban leader's
Favorite comedian
So much so they want me
To come entertain the troops
live in Afghanistan
All expenses paid
I get to stay in the penthouse cave
As much heroin as i can take
24 hour round the clock security
And they have personally
guaranteed me
Even if i bomb it doesn't matter
Either way the show will still end
with me going out with a bang
To a standing ovation baying
crowd
Thinking wow didn't think much
of his joke's or material
But what a cracking ending
Now that's funny
Encore
But this time please with even
more explosives than you used
before
May as well use what the fleeing
infidel troops left behind
Waste not want not
They aren't coming back any
time soon to reclaim it are they
Otherwise we wouldn't be here
in the 1st place would we
And they have the audacity
to say we don't have a sense
of humour
We'll joke's on them look who's
laughing now
We got everything we ever
wanted
Only this time we didn't even
have to fight you for it
You simply handed the key's
back over to us
No strings attached
Apart from good luck cleaning
up our mess
Your welcome to it
You see we always have the last
laugh and save the best till last
And you can take that to the body bank
I use to laugh at ironic things
No punishment for the bad deeds
The Bible says that good 10 fold
The universe returns to us in gold
That fairytales and nursery rhymes
Exist to scare and keep us in line
But on this day fate stepped in
And karma it seems is a comedian
A lesson weaved throughout every line
Carefully crafted as a warning sign
It was a day like any other
As usual jumped in the shower
Quickly washed and rinsed my hair
Noticed too late that it was NAIR!
Every luscious lock and strand
Fell out completely in my hand
What seems like a sick joke being played
Or demented parts a malicious prank
A plot unfolded my part the lead
The lines straight from a horror scene
Like laws of nature or earths gravity
The rules we bend to suit our need
Like a boomerang’s invisible path
It seems to follow when it comes back
Even the ocean and it’s changing tides
Needs the moon’s persuasive side
We are the keepers of what we seek
And what we sow we indeed will reap
The nightmare that we fear the most
Comes back to haunt us like a ghost
Like Peter Pan and Captain Hook
Just a good story in a children’s book
what if the earth gets bored of us
And decides that we are entertainment
those characters we read as kids
Like Pinocchio or the 3 little pigs
Sleeping beauty or the ogre Shrek
You thought was funny as a sketch
Brought to life would pose a threat
Although to you this seems far fetched
The truth Ive written has not been stretched
I hope you read this and know as fact
What you put out there will soon come back
A renowned red head,
Although the color is questionable.
She seems to always have antics…
To pull off on the silver screen.
Her hair isn’t the only thing…
That leaves a lasting impression.
She has those exquisite eyes…
And that stunning figure.
When I think of her and her exploits…
I’m reminded of my most notable experiences,
Especially those moments of chaos…
When I realize I’ve been so hysterically funny.
She is the one and only,
The great comedian of her age.
And I will say it one more time…
I love Lucy – she is truly great!
8/29/19
MY UPCOMING BIRTHDAY (09-03) CELEBRITY Contest
Sponsored by: William Kekaula
Nervously he waits, the curtains rise,
to see eager faces with piercing eyes
He tells them a joke, it's a wonderful tale,
anecdotes so funny, theres no way he could fail.
They love him, they applaud him, he's the king of his craft,
with fifty years experience, it's no wonder they laughed.
His calling fulfilled, the man went down a storm,
as the curtain falls, his face starts to deform,
he's remembering his true love, the wife who has passed,
its was almost twenty years ago, it just went by so fast.
He enters his empty home, thinking all the while,
can't somebody out there make the comedian smile?