Water Closet Poems | Examples


Premium Member Two Waterloos

    Napoleon had his Waterloo

      I had mine, in a water closet too

Premium Member Caught short

There was an old woman from Dorset
Who forgot to fasten her corset
When she was in town
Her knickers also came down
 To save her face 
She had to race
To reach a water closet.


Premium Member Organic Matter -I Gotta Go

organic matter;
derriere rush,
after I'm done wiping myself off, then gotta flush;
flushing it down into the water closet; 
got to go plunging poo;
ooh! ooh! ooh!
oh oh no shaped like a log;
floating on the water top;
of the stool it's poo!
And it's gotta come out shoo!
Dirty, filthy body waste manure stool;
Just, organic matters


Written words by James Edward Lee Sr © 2021
7/22/21

The Dunny Brush

THE DUNNY BRUSH
It has been here since modern sewerage was begun
and each water closet usually has at least one.
But to get a participant to use it, can really be a chore.
Most folk will use the paper but sadly for some, the Dunny brush ignore.
We have warned, scolded and abused them about their stain,
To grab the handle and scrub up and down again and again and again.
Many just don`t get it . They will not own their own poo,
so they leave it in the bowl. It is not their responsibility to clean the flamin loo.
So we have had workshops for the solution,
To brainstorm and solve the concern for this ablution.
Some have installed water jets to clean the soiled parts,
While others have janitors who make regular inspections while pushing their cleaning carts.
Alas, around here these luxuries we haven`t got,
 so we ask you the Guest, to give it your best shot.
To learn the art of the toilet brush is easy, so don`t do your thing and run.
Grab it by the handle between forefingers and the thumb.
Now scrub it hard and sure till all traces are unstuck.
If it has caused you to sweat a bit, just remember,
It isn`t ours or theirs, its your smelly muck.

Premium Member Funny Poo-Part 2

Funny poo dung muck droppings ordure;
Little toddler gotta boo-boo;
biege rustic cow chips;
Oops! Watch it later;
Oh, nan just stepped  in it;
Scuffed up my patent leather;
Funny poo
Smell muddle grounds fly's maggots migrate;
Part taking in stinky homage;
Funny poo
Organic ya matter diarrhea rash;
Billy did you forget to flush;
Rushing to the water closet;
Funny poo
Gotta go, oh! No no ooh;
Funny boo-boo;
Refuse ordure toilet us;
Ooh! Gotta go, go, low
Someone locked  the bathroom door;
I'm too proud  to wear Depends
Oops  ooh that's just so nasty,  ooh!
Funny poo?



2/2/21
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr © 2021


Premium Member Outhouse Wake Up Call

coldest day ever
stiff outhouse door barely shuts
rude awakening

Premium Member Water Closet

Poet Sir John Harrington
He tried to be a good Samaritan
He invented the water closet loo
To be able to stay indoors to poo


2/24/19

Before Our Queen

What I wish is war wasn't around any more

And every time when we would open a door

We would all politely be allowed to come in

After a while still be able to come back again.


Fighting would be replaced by friendship I hear

Peace would be extended over the hemisphere

But before you hit the bed and have to crash

Recycle crush and smash and put out the trash.


Will always let a women get on before me.

Even if she happens to be high society

And every time when we may meet

Will walk and be on closed side to the street.


Won't have to wear an Easter Bonnet

When you will be using our water closet

Everyone there is always jolly by golly

And tend to smile while riding a trolley


In British Isles when you first arrive

And from a horrible trip had to survive

Sorry we wont have a Boston Baked bean

Still should bow or curtsy before our Queen.


James Thomas Horn, Retired Veteran

Oneday Oneday

Life at Okusibanstate
Is far opposite that of an estate
Yet, I seem less bothered
For in the few days to come
I shall bed and breathe in an estate

The morning swing on the village atonko
Seems like hours of comfort on a luxurious water closet
That I’m never in a hurry to leave
For in the few days to come
I shall decide when and where to pupu

The square meals of Bankye Ampesi without fish
Taste more like a bridegroom’s Hamburger
That I lick to the last green
For in the few days to come
I shall decide where and what to eat


For I’m building a solid foundation
To build on it a strong and a bright future
In the few days to come
Shall emerge a great and wealthy me

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