There is not a price you could pay
No amount of time you could do
Deep scars come to surface every other day
Nothing could heal the hell you put me through
Your brother died in debt to you, was I the price to pay?
I've been imprisoned by demons you unleashed no matter what I do
Dad's suicide brought me to my knees, I didn't imagine life could get any worse then that devastating day
Your ill-intended helping hand scorched by touch breathed a far worse hell to make it through
Silence of unspeakable violence broken in hopes for simply being your daughter she too wont have to pay
If I can help save another from the same awful fate then that's what I intend to do
How can you watch a child grow and look at them as prey? Did you think to yourself they'll reach the ripe age I crave one day?
I pray I'm not too late and no one else has fallen victim to the hell you put me though
Relationships with loved ones are a price I pay
I'm looking over my shoulder paranoid in all that I do
I've got deep seeded trust issues to this very day
Time you cant misplace or erase so what is justice for the hell I'm still surviving through?
It isn't just incompetence
That leads a custody evaluator
To to clean up messes
For bad actors,
To justify
The unjustifiable,
To gloss over
The vital,
It isn’t just incompetence,
It's the rotten system
That the custody evaluator
Has been marinating in.
I can imagine
Watching the morning sun
Slip through the curtain cracks
And dance upon your sleeping face
Seeing the different hues of perfection
Twirl upon your lips
As natures orchestra too begins to wake
I imagine
You smell of dew licked roses
And daffodils
Bathed in heavenly glitter
An orgasmic scent of morning rain
The mother of all things beautiful
I can imagine
Burning
For the warmth of your smile
Squirming under it's intensity
Feeling that I've felt this before
In a dream I once had
I can imagine
Becoming addicted to this morning ritual
Feeling this emotional every morning
That I wake up next to this much
Unjustifiable, unquantifiable happiness
I can imagine
Spending the day
Trying to stop the world from turning
Have time stand still
As I look into your love filled eyes
I can imagine
Going to bed with nothing else on my mind
But having you asleep in my arms
Forgetting that true life exists
Outside of this space
Love doesn't need my imagination anymore
Blind Injustice
A hornet's nest evokes quietude and dignity
Till threatened with unjustifiable inhumanity
Penned: 12/21/2021
7:49 p.m.
Lake Worth
Florida USA
Are we living
No we're dying
Drug popping and pistol buying
What kind of seeds are being sown
When taking lives become our own
Who's raising our kids
The street of death
And the lifetime bids
Father's absence from the home
Mother's don't care they are street gone
Out searching for Mr. Wrong
Wondering what he has going on
No more talking, no peace, nothing left
A sentence of street death
Falling tears ...still weeping
Sleep and still sleeping
When do we awake
From the violence of self hate
Outraged when we see others take from us
Taking a trip on that murderous bus
Not uniting
But constantly fighting
Hate consumed
Crimes unjustifiable
Less hate
More love
More peace
Minds at ease
Ignorance ceased
Wise up
RISE UP
A poet's soul lay in slumber,
his pen a distasteful adversary.
A suffering soul lost in yesterday,
stumbled upon his somnolent path.
Enchanted eyes felt her nakedness
through barriers of her cryptic veil.
Echoing tremors of her broken soul
gently charmed his hardened heart.
Enraptured by her enchanted tears
he joined her capricious journey.
Her enigmatic elegance inspired his
zealous zealot pen to ooze musings
praising their charismatic camaraderie.
Drifting into the anomaly of her mind,
he became a victim of a Freudian slip.
Voices tormented her malinger mantra,
suffocating her into a maudlin malaise.
Reprehensible words led to bruised ego,
unjustifiable actions led to lonely silence.
An aroma that expired with her last petal.
A poet's soul lays in slumber,
his pen a distasteful adversary.
Silent One
Simple Musing
23 January 2018
Freudian slip
a slip-up that (according to Sigmund Freud) results from the operation of unconscious wishes or conflicts and can reveal unconscious processes in normal healthy individuals
Some things in this world are not to be revealed.
They are the things that one should only feel.
Like the breeze that blows, in between,
the front and back door window screens.
Or the way I feel when you surprise me with a kiss,
there is no better feeling I know, than this.
Some things in this world are better left unsaid,
Like thoughts that we know shouldnt leave our head,
Promoting ourselves when we should compliment others instead.
Some things in this world are undeniable.
Like the sunrise at dawn, or dandelions on my lawn,
I know it will happen, though unjustifiable.
Some things in this world are fleeting...scarce.
Like the pale moon glowing on the still waters edge.
Or the orange and purple clouds in a summer sunset.
Many of these things are beautiful, Its true.
But to me, there is nothing I could see, as beautiful as you...
-WHY!?-
Why do the many "Great United
Nations" of the world;
Suffer from underfunded education,
while taxing with frivolous expectations,
researching into lab based creations?
Enact vast unjustifiable laws,
endorsed by a corporate cause,
to eliminate and perfect human flaws?
Have men, women and kids on the streets,
enduring poverty and self defeat,
hungrily watching the upper class eat?
Support political and business corruption,
profiteering from the production,
of environmental and human destruction?
For we, the people of these many nations,
have allowed ourselves to be victims by
not taking a stand hand in hand. Let us
unite as a race and break through their
grand lies, by first asking ourselves...
"WHY!?"
-Anonymously youRs-
I am beyond reason-
NO! I am at odds with reason
This unjustifiable act I deplore
Posing as righteous when in fact despicable
This thing which misconstrues that which is at its core
Burns and buries emotions
Makes suspect of all one once adored
Depleting credible relationships to useless parody
To associations that truly mean nothing to anyone, anymore
This posture of reason I detest
Flung about to objectify and belittle
To separate and strengthen lines of protest
To make the less priviledged be further ridiculed
Has one no heart?
No compassion?
No sense to be-
Beyond the constraints of social platters
All of which are matters that now mean nothing to me
For I have seen and in seeing have seen through
No longer shall I be reasoned with
No longer shall I be posed as the fool
For my heart and spirit are rich
Gorging on affairs that enrich
That bring one closer to the basis of their existence
That allows one to be rather than feel insufficent
The defect lies not in the feeling
But completely and purposefully in its reasoning
So I am at odds, bare strict contention with such beings
Such anomolies confused as dignities!
Believing in him was, an unjustifiable thought
A thought, I should of left in the clouds
But if I had one wish, I would dance
Letting thunder and rain, teach him a lesson
Hoping the stars, would shine his soul
While I close my eyes, and dance
Bringing the sun, out of his heart
Giving him, what true love is about
Teaching him, true meaning of respect
As, I rake the thorns out his blood
Showing him, what his body, was made for
For I shall not be, that last thorn
Love stories is, not in need
I already see, trying to believe
His dreams, our dreams, aren't dreams
There unjustifiable thoughts
Thoughts of ignorance, stupidity, with senselessness meaning
He holds my hand and danced under rain, catching the romanticism
I no longer need or want, catch this love, baby please
Take it all, romanticism, I set him free
Enter his soul, for this pain is his
Not mine
Release his personalities, within his soul
Give him room, for what I give
My ice is froze, ice freezing cold
Feel the story under my skin, screaming for
For
What isn't there, just isn't there
Only his, unjustifiable thoughts
Delilah Ventura
There was a time, when I felt totally undesirable
unjustifiably [I now know] and you being in your infancy
felt so.. un-understood, writhing in a man’s body, seemingly a child
with the heart of a warrior, a man, with all a man’s needs.
There was a time, when time stood still, and time meant nothing,
and age was but an unjustifiable number on a page of societal crap.
I needed you. You wanted me. And so………….we were.
There was a time, so long ago, it seems a passing dream;
we paired, we parted, and life went on…
Now, as time seems to slide by with the speed of passing film
I remember, not without wonder…Who am I?
And where are you? Do you remember?
I am not at all sure [for who ever is…] and I am sorry, if our momentary joy,
brought you anything else...In the deep of night sometimes [often, truth be told]
I wonder, should I say….sorry?
for loving you?
Thank you for dying for us
Thank you for saving us sinners
Thank you for suffering
Thank you for taking our place
Thank you for the nail-scarred hands
Thank you for enduring the wounds that were put upon You
Thank you for the stripes that heal our sickness and disease
Thank you for following your Father’s will
And laid down yours
Thank you for the Eternal Life that you gave
Thank you for your Blood that shields us from the evil one
Thank you Lord, so many thanks
We can’t ever thank You enough
Father – We appreciate you Lord
For all you’ve done
For all you’ve been through
Thank you Lord, our Father
Our Unjustifiable, Implausible, Inconceivable, Insupposable One
Dare to ask God?
Do I dare to ask you?
Dare to ask you that you will give everything to me?
Dare to ask for the impossible
The incredible that only you can do and give
I dare to ask Lord
That you will give everything to me
Dare to ask for the impossible
The unbelievable, the incredible that only You can give
The indescribable, the unfathomable, the irrefutable
The unsearchable, the unjustifiable, the unquantifiable
Everything that you are and were
That only you can give
Dare to ask you God
I dare to ask You
All the cruel people
Take them away
Give me the space, give me the air
I can’t just go living with people
That don’t even care,
They don’t even pretend to care
At this precise moment
I miss him more the ever
Bring him to me…for just one stare
At this precise moment
I sought the truth, I uncovered the veil
To see the ugliness of the beast
The truth that no wonder threatened the beat
If I could just live
Just be, just declare
This is my life, and everyone
Just back away
I may explode
I may kill with rage
You dug the soul of pureness underneath my flesh
Now it’s your turn
Suffer the consequences of your unjustifiable play
You ugly monsters of the night
Show me yourselves and you would have wished
To be slaughtered a thousand whips
Than to see what you just have witnessed
Don’t speak to me with that mouth
That deceitful mouth
Which lies while smiling to my face
Don’t speak through your weak mouth
Too weak to resist temptation
Whose lips kiss in unforgivable betrayal
Don’t speak to me with that mouth
That has embraced another
A mouth full of cheapened kisses
Don’t speak through your weak mouth
Don’t dare to seek to justify
Your unjustifiable infidelities
Don’t speak through that odious mouth
That unspeakable dishonest mouth
Your unclean vessel of elicit ********
Don’t with those unfaithful lips
Whose kisses caressed anothers skin
Speak my name in terms of love
Don’t say sorry with that mouth
Don’t contaminate my ears
With platitudes and insincerity
Speak to me with that insidious mouth
That foul and deceitful mouth
Only to utter a final goodbye
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