Short Chassis Poems

king of the Yukon
	opulent orange chassis ~ 
		desperate desire 
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chartreuse chassis
of my rental car —
relative glare

8/6/2021
A Brian Strand 1,2 or 3 line
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Louella was a distraction
Giving us boys satisfaction
We loved her chassis
She was a fine lassy
And always ready for action

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a fifties T-bird
she is sexy and sultry
turquoise her color.

a fifties T-bird
she’s wrapped in fat luscious chrome
showing her chassis


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Camelot produced two tots
Caroline, and John Junior...
How their mother cried when their father died!
   Instead of rebuilding a productive chassis
   ~ She went gold-digging and married Onassis...

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A certain young filly has caught my fancy
I squirm and I jiggle, and I get all antsy
Won't mention her name
But my parts are aflame
All ga-ga over her smoldering chassis




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Once was this famous chef named Nancy
Guys were always trying to get in her pantry
But her salt and pepper
Caused sneezing peckers
Her meals were amazing and whatta chassis




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Once was this famous chef named Nancy
Guys were always trying to get in her pantry
But her salt and pepper
Caused sneezing peckers
Her meals were amazing and whatta chassis




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I once knew a sassy lassie
Who led me to a bank so grassy
So flirtatious was she
Her undulations so free
Boy! she sure had a classy chassis








http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/humour-4.php

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Once was this famous chef named Nancy
Guys were always trying to get in her pantry
But her salt and pepper
Caused many sneezing peckers
Her meals were amazing and whatta chassis




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Indian food has recently caught my fancy
Delicious and it also maintains my chic chassis
May sound like bragging
Do I hear you gagging
Can't stand it myself, my bod's always been baggy




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Smell the burning rubber.
Hear the screeching tyre. 
Watch in awe as the wheels fly off 
and the chassis catches fire.
Then avert your eyes.
Say your au revoir.
The casualties are packed in tight
Limp inside the car.
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The tale of three dogs and a lassie
                 And the explosions that came from their chassis
      It splattered the ground
        With a most terrible sound
           Now their wiping their bums on the grassy...

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Whatta croc these crocs are, surely quite nasty
Tried making friends but took chunks from my chassis
Well that wasn't nice
Surely didn't entice
Roared loudly, showing eighty-nine teeth quite flashy




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A sweet young girlie in bra and panties
Makes my wee friend stand up and get all antsy
I lose total control
Squirming in my camisole
As I longingly survey her curvy young chassis


© Jack Ellison 2015




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take me for a test drive
look under my hood
tinker with my engine
I still run good

look at my smooth chassis
investigate my dash
I can get you there
and do it pretty fast

investigate deeper
don't do it just for fun
I have a few dings
but I purr when I run...

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Perfect posture 
Your back is straight 
Elegant gait 
Beauty will shine 

Don’t ever slouch 
Align your spine 
God’s own design 
Classy chassis 

Jan Allison
4th August 2014

Written for RIDE ON A PATHYA VA Contest Sponsored by Nette Onclaud
~Awarded 1st place~
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Swift spirited reindeers 
Slipped on the slick rooftop 
Santa plumpish chassis
Shimmies down the chimney
Soot prints on gifts under
Shimmering tinsel tree
Sneaks away in his sleigh


12/24/2016


Contest : Merry Christmas And Happy New Year Pleiades    
Sponsored by:	Andrea Dietrich...

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My stint is to constrict,
Like a serpent on the offence.
Twisting and squeezing, 
My pulchritudinous polka dots.

Whether my complexion burns like fire
Or freezes like ice
My chassis and tenuity hold true.

Versatility makes my copies 
As I'm prerequisite to all.
Children abhor me,
Corpulent simpletons do likewise.
Prestigious parliament parade me
As I'm a sign of social standing.


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no other movement feels like this
no other soothing stroke equals this bliss

there is only one comparison agreeable to me
that is the unconditional loyalty of thee

heal my sanity and lubricate my chassis
humble my vanity and upgrade me from ashy to classy

thank you for giving me a gift of the rarest of forms
for the bond the we created and will strengthen will surely weather even the mightiest of storms.......

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All I behold are the shades of darkness, the moon shines, the stars twinkle.
But my ecstasy for your glimpse, your abundance is leaving me fidgety.
My mind promenading in the blissful warmth of your heat and sparkle.
On my hands, my lips, my eyes and all of me, for the touch of your gleam I crave.
Though my Chassis slumbers, my heart will stay up forever.
For I always feel you crawling nearer to me with each passing moment!...

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I dreamt of a Lassie;
she had a firm Chassis.
Her name was Randy
woke up with a Standee
Don't tell my wife Tandy
She'll know I drank Shandy
and just reprimand Me.
Well, it's over with Tandy 
our divorce was going Badly,
so, I gave her a big Shanty
it made us both Happy.
Have a date with Shandy
She's my Lemon Candy.
How in the hell did I get that Standee?

Monorhyme Contest
Sponsored by L Milton Hankins
Written 10/ 6/ 2022
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Caution: 
Do not attempt to remove yourself.
You have incurred the penalty
Of my undying devotion.
My heart and soul are clamped to yours.
Removal could mean a huge fine.
You are so fine, I find.
Get your engine in gear
And accompany me.
Give me ideas above my station.
You have been found
Obstructing my peace of mind.
I may just tow you home,
Bumper to bumper,
And let you park your chassis
Really close to mine.
My fine
Valentine.
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An exquisite detail of Ebony
Brown, like gold like dust, this human chassis
The beauty of melanin
Sits proudly on her iris.

She spreads, ogling at the sun
Delightfully
Like it's fiery, spells fun
She stares with lips lurching seductively.

Her existence is nobody's stranger
Like the biblical raven in sky
She has dwelled much longer
Than men learnt to see with both eye.

In between
Her beautiful world
In between, I wish to be seen
Sharing in her royal blood....

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