Long Plumbers Poems

Unquotable quotes: The Janitor, Gardienne, Landlady, Housekeeper, Portero, the Sereno and the Hausgast – XXXI  Part One

Be they so named or not in these here parts, visions of shrieking furies with Gorgon heads and...

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Picture this.
Exploding pipe bombs.
Land fields that can take your arms off.
Driving off road, and frenzied, with excitement 
Adrenaline RAGING.
Oh, yes, Syrian Teenagers,
It is “Let’s See If We Are Really Alive” day.
Okay, we’ll let in some...

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No youngster himself, Fred often repeats what his father used to say: 

"There are always preludes to hell." 

For Fred one of those preludes is waiting for service people, folks who fix the things in...

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"Well, I Never"    posted 3 May 2021

Six musings on the word never...

you should never marry a tennis player      love means nothing to them

my wife tells me I...

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I don't really want to cripple the church
I realize that the Pope and the church have problems
Imagine in his position
all the expenses of the church

The budgets, electricity 
building maintenance wages
costs of administration
Granted the disciples

used to...

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I’ve heard lots of feminists say
we’d be better off without men,
they claim that they are just joking,
but say it again and again.
That we’re all of the world’s problems,
that we start all of the world’s wars,
the...

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Slowing Down 

Electricity runs through my veins. 
It courses in waves,
from my head to my feet, 
and back. 
Why? 
Because I am ever, 
waiting for the other shoe to drop. 
I heard the first one,...

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FROM BIKINI BOTTOM TIMES...

...Spongebob Squarepants...what...atoll...?
plunged into where,...no way...toilet bowl...
supposedly, when the ghostly hand ex-toll
ling praise from his late creator, and master

meow mind of popular Stephen Hillenburg
cast said main character in clean new role,
an unexpected greasy,...

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Well some they say though straight or gay
Get fun from innuendo
While others wait ‘til dark
To get their kicks outside your window

Some do the deed without a sound
Some labour in the dark
While others roars would wake...

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(Wems Henry Temmy  Psalm 79)

June comes to put on a nice tune 
Hard to listen while citizens sing 
Soft to deny for those leading her fortune 
Telling You to stand for us oh KING
Let...

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Never argue with a woman when she's tired or rested
One good turn gets most of the blankets
The qualities that most attract a woman to a man
are usually the same ones she can't stand years later
It's...

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Joe The Plumber announced he was runnin' fer Congress the other day!
Congratulations, Joe!  You the man!  Fer you I shout, "Hooray!"
Tell 'em like it is as you did with Obama - show 'em...

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We never saw it coming, we were all at university
studying to be the future intelligentsia.
We wanted to be lawyers, accountants, and bankers,
we wanted to be science teachers, podiatrists, and politicians
and we made it!
We had the...

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When that energy consumes your body. 
Feeling weak and muscles seem shoddy. 
That means it’s time to get up and stand. 
Drop whatever weapon was in your hand. 

Look at something to focus your rage....

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Still heat. The dust in the gutters 
is dry. A droning fly 
can be heard through the shutters. 

Ruined walls. Rubble. Sun-cracked plaster. 
Afternoon, and nothing stirs. 
Things should be moving faster. 

Some streets away,...

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Whether it's a shellcreeper or it's a freezie,
fret not, mes amis! you have Mario and Luigi,
"mama mia!","Let's go!" when you hear them say,
those plumbers in red & green are off to save the day!

Luigi is...

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Signed, JabroniVille USA

Hammer the sidewalk to watch it crack
Fade the symbols and strike a chord
Watch an army of plumbers unite
To evict the evil worms digging holes
In the universe

But most importantly
Welcome to JabroniVille USA
A town where...

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i havent written anything in ages,i sit inspirationless pen hovering above blank pages
my creative juices have evaporated,i'm mentally constipated, thoughts stagnated trapped in a room thats locked and gated.My minds a black hole in which...

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Naomi's and Stanley Torment - The Villanelle Of The Home


Naomi couldn't stop thinking about the home
It was just so splendid and perfect
so excited that she was approved of, the loan 

That morning, Naomi was shocked...

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I'm not quite sure when
they first arrived by boat
stepping onto Ellis Island
which is in New York,
alls I know is that my
ancestors came from
Germany, Wales and Ireland,
probably in the 1850s
or around that time,
when a lot of...

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There was a time when tradesmen,
Like plumbers or mechanics, were all fulltime people.
But nowadays a tradesman has to do multiple tasks, 
Mainly because their number is dwindling.
When they are not available,
Householders have to do the...

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The person who is trustworthy in small matters is also trustworthy in great ones. - St. Luke 16:10; 16:9-15

We practice trust all the time
We trust other people – pilots, plumbers, teachers, letter carriers, car mechanics,...

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Adam and Eve is where my tree starts
with Noah's son Japheth leaving his mark
spreading his DNA seed all over Europe
his lineage from long ago quickly passing the buck,

Ireland, Wales and Germany my family sprang
with Ireland...

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I didn't know what to do when I left school,
But I thought I would become a plumber, wouldn't that be cool.

Most of the work is inside I thought,
But I should have looked closer, I really...

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Something in so-called modern landscaping 
                    amuses me no end;
  be it in plush mansions,...

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