Long Pickpocket Poems

HO HO WHOA Second Chance algorithm drawing for January 17, 2025

No matter I kept fingers and toes crossed,
and waited with bated breath since January 2, 2025
even converted from skeptic to orthodox Judaism,
and strictly followed the...

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"Well, I Never"    posted 3 May 2021

Six musings on the word never...

you should never marry a tennis player      love means nothing to them

my wife tells me I...

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Pawn
You've been a peon, lowly pawn your whole life
Never amounted to much,
nothing much ever went right
Grew up dirt piss poor,
never knew the reason why
you were put on this earth for
So you start cyber chasing every...

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From time to time, people ask me
About my education.
Only then, I remember
I have no degrees or diplomas.
I attended no university either.
I hated textbooks and exams.
I still do.
That's bad education, they say.

But they don't know
I was...

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DOWN A STORM DRAIN GONE FOREVER.

There was once a wicked, jealous old human,
Who lived in a house down the lane, 
Not far from us,
Ugly and mean sounding, couldn’t tell
If man or woman,
Was narky to the...

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I’ve often wondered, if it weren’t written in the Bible
Would I have done it anyway?
Would I have given the same honor to my mother and father
And faithfully reverenced God every Sabbath day?

Would I have upheld...

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Seduced by the $ubtil $ound



Put your elephant ear to the ground,
and listen pachyderm carefully
Do you hear the err stampede sound ...
stimulus assisted thievery deed

There’s been a clandestine meeting
at the Guv’s backroom, ivory Oval table
Secret society...

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She keeps her darkness well within
Under her smile so drenched with sin
Letting it seep and settle in, 
The only proof, a dazzling grin
She don’t even flinch at being fought 
She knows she’s in safe hands
For...

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when i grow up, i wanna be a pickpocket
more respectable perhaps than a hypocrite
to tell the truth i really don't want to remit
yet it seems kinda unkind, to just be opposite

so i'll say to you...

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Steal away the idol children
Work ‘em to death,
give them no pay
Carry their cries 
	      on a plaintive wind

Pilfer their graven image mind
Then fill it with empty thoughts
of caste assimilation

Melting pot...

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Born into a life of poverty crime and squalor
where hunger and cold winds bite
and disease is rife
and it was a daily battle to stay alive
and find some food to stay alive.

Uneducated illiterate caught in the...

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Thinking about Brian's recent Footle contest (my crazy eyes had been seeing FOOTIE all this 
time and just realized yesterday it is called FOOTLE with LE on the end) I proceeded to drive 
to the...

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This morning at (long) last something-I was robbed in a way I was fearful curious about. What happened?!
Pickpockets are a myth, almost everyone I know have an experience-with. 
Pickpocket by definition  "a person who...

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COSMICALLY DEEP

Did the garden weep
With the ungrateful sweep
Of their covetous hands? Deep
Was the pit of their pickpocket. Sleep
Thought merciful and kind, allowed not a peep
From their rosy lips, where sweet cheeks steep.*
A father took enough...

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Now who entrusted an ugly octopus
with the pretty plaid pocketbook?

An eight arm six-finger crook
crawling up the vault wall
is such a dirty, filthy lucre look

Those pretty piggy bank pennies
are no-account disappearing
And them buxom chicks bouncy checks
are...

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My sharp 
              eyes  
                      saw
           
A dog  
        digging 
                    a hole
                             at Davenport.
A cat 
        catching 
                     a cobra and 
                                        cutting 
                                                   its head.
A witch 
            bewitching  
                              with 
                                    witchcraft.
A robber...

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Don’t pardon those demockratory quips,
them dishonest mistakes
Unless you love
walking thru a field of verbal cow chips

Beware! Aye lips very often halitosis snip

Here is a rue unpardonable exit tip:
Brown nose aroma
is blew gaslight, pig methane lit...

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The Thief Autism

Thief!
Childhood stolen by cowardly thief ~
Hiding in the shadows – masked face!

Bandit!
Holding hostage gifts and talents ~
Creation’s praise left penniless!

Feckless burglar!
Looting joy!  Friendship hijacked ~
Words embezzled in mute babbles!

Surly swine!
Poaching laughter! ...

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comparison is a pickpocket plucking joy from my handbag
I have been compared to countless things and things
that cannot be counted, or counted on

mostly fair assessments of character
only a handful of assassinations

I have been an assassin.
accused...

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Polly Jez don’t ever ‘pologize
Curt cracker tongue
spit the hate cloudy issue high

Got black gunpowder love,
bullet hole
between the breast
And white tufts of tawdry deeds,
foolish follicles 
sprouting on the chest

P Jez Is a belle — 
princess Cain...

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(I have three trains 
in my diary pages)

Solo, 14/01/1994

I met train a week 
before you will not meet me 
anymore

I was really nervous to know it 

you ever told me: many pickpocket,
they know how the...

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That dark ink with which you were written
burning so coarsely to leave you with
a calloused and thoughtless destiny
comes now to pickpocket all your smiles
all your loves
and loves there were to bind your time

Save now but...

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Like two paynim peas in a pod,
their scurvy color
lipslick scheme is sour green

Got beady black eyes
scam shady — 
A graft gaze that squints bifurcated focus
from hocus-pocus pupils;
whose tainted teal look-see, aperture con-fidence teach
a vulture view!

Crafty...

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Life is full of averse
Of course nobody wants to join life adverse
How I wish my life is an isle
At least there will be no one to arrange outrage in mind’s aisle
We walk in troupe
Yet within...

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Silver tongue money sign blow
bellow ballast 
moral bankruptcy notes
Reprobate shekel vocal chords
toot the $eductive $ound of the crafty coin jingle — 
Filthy lucre windpipes
utter-ly craving more and more

Tainted dross lips blare grifter bluesy groans, 
lover...

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