Long Neurologist Poems

Pain settles in quite instantly your senses 
are totally unprepared for this graveness
the notion to sleep sets in like an energetic 
twilight phase the injury abruptly strangles 
thought my ears are always ringing with this...

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For my handler’s special agent Leroy Heimbach special agent Kevin Dreary special agent Paula Brand special agent Alan King how I became a causality of wearing wires pregnant buying weapons and drugs for the justice...

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Being bullied to death by JAY TOWNSEND JOHNSON HENRY IDENTITY FRAUD it all began with my entering Montez Williams poetry contest after suffering severe mental breakdown writing poetry was comforting healing my son encouraged me...

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I shan't try and be witty an engage in the norm 
peeking through such pain my eyes see dim 
as crushing temporal lesion push against 
soft tissue endings pounding my optic nerves 
from my forehead...

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Veterans Day heist while Vietnam 
veterans enjoy the Veterans Day 
deals with family old war buddies 
gathered VFW American Legions 
unfortunately we spent the morning 
taking me to get twelve injections 
in my head for...

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I accept what i need offer up what's left
Let ridicule fall on ears that are deft
Just as a fisherman catches fish on his hook
I write out my poems and put together books
The reason I do...

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part 1 of 2

Annick (my 28 year old sister) came down to NYC, from Boston, for a day visit. It was one of those warm, cerulean days between Christmas and New Years. Annick’s in a...

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My accomplish are very small throughout the  daytime
Senior and retired, I have to remember to make sure I don’t forget to take my pills
Memory is short and cannot  focus

Seven fifteen  in the...

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Walking very rigid with a slight unsteady gait  
As I walk I'll often veer from side to side 
Although by this I could appear to some as being drunk
I feel totally disorientated and utterly...

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I went to buy an R.V.
They said all I could afford was a Lose-a Beggo.

I bought a pair of alligator shoes.
But then I started wandering off into swamps.
Finally, I had to toss them, they were
really...

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Dedicated to my son, my heart, my Kyle


As infant, he was a smile and precious dimples
  who had experienced no day or night simple.
He constantly battled while growing in the womb
  in order...

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"Praise ye the LORD. O give thanks unto the LORD; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever." Psalm 106:1 of the King James Bible*

“He will progress toward retrogression…”
oh, gloomy tidings --- verily...

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My known, soothing landscapes,
grown from my own hues and shapes,
somehow vanquished their view.
Just one more sore blister of news
to aid my staid mind’s gist of confused.
My angered fist punched tears in their wake
before my shock...

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I asked my neurologist

So what would happen
if I suddenly switched from egocentric Left-hemisphere dominant identity
toward ecocentric Right-hemisphere prominent bilateral individuation 
mutually refining co-arising thought/felt relationships,
sensory nutritional and/or toxic predominance.

Not to worry,
responds my socio-therapist,
You would probably...

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Left

© By Holly W. Schwartztol

Early on that morning
I wracked my brain
Trying to solve
A computer glitch

As I left the wretched machine
I rose and felt suddenly dizzy
And as the room spun

I chided myself
Saying this isn’t worth
Your having...

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At first, I barely noticed your presence
all I saw of you was 
a swift turn of the head
no one else noticed 
but I did
Over time you became bolder
extrovert, out there
then, everyone noticed
when the spasmodic jerking...

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Delightfully coloring a butterfly drawing
my child, secured in his custom-built wheel chair
grips, midst obvious struggle
his yellow crayon…

Wow… he’s enjoying his creativity-schedule
as he painstakingly finishes his artwork
along bugging restlessness
overcoming “butterfly-in-pupa stage” syndrome…

Soon with glee-filled countenance
devoid of...

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On that fateful day in August arriving late, so unusual for me
For I am always early; did I know deep down what the verdict would be
As soon as I walked through that door, the neurologist...

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dadgum doctors, heads up their butts
poking, prodding, pricking skin
neurologist a psychopath
gets pleasure as electric volts pass through my body

family doctor showed little concern
made me paranoid about irregular heartbeat
EKG failed to determine cause
left me more in...

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Taunted bully teased for suffering 
with mental illness it is emotionally 
challenging just to open up to share 
your creativity in the form of writing 
therapist say keep writing crisis team 
says you matter and...

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When you were born 
It was the best of days
Such a small one
Your life had begun in different ways

There was something wrong
We thought then
And went to the doctors
To put our doubts to end

So the tests...

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When we were young we’d go for weeks
And nary a doctor we’d see.
But now that our senior years have arrived
Seems that hardly a moment is free.

Appointments accumulate day after day -
It’s hard to keep them...

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The neurologist hung me out to dry
“No cure,” says he as I hang by a thread
All dressed up and wanting to fly
Took torturous tests that I did dread
What?  No means of comfort? Have I...

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Imagine an ice pick
to the core of the meat 
twist and yank and pull
through smashed socket
cracking temples in a vice grip
hammer through bone and gristle

take that sharpened fork,
heated sear my tender neck 
claw it off my tightened...

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