Long Feller Poems

What I’m going to tell you now might make you think I’m loco. I hope that you’ll believe me, but I don’t care if you do.
You asked me what - in all my life’s -...

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This is, as indicated, the final THIRD of this fairly lengthy poem. Due to Poetry Soup's file-size limitations, this piece had to be posted in 3 parts. 
   The 1st and 2nd thirds...

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Here's the scoop, friends...
   This is, as indicated, the 1st HALF of this fairly lengthy poem. The 2nd half had to be posted separately due to Poetry Soup's file-size limitations. No other way...

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This is, as indicated, the 1st THIRD of this lengthy poem. The 2nd and final thirds had to be posted separately due to Poetry Soup's file-size limitations. No other way I could manage to make...

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Gaylord Laryngitis was a monstrous human being.    
They say he weighed…at ten years old…at least 400 pounds,
But standin’ 6 foot 7…and because he exercised…
he actually didn’t look real “fat”…despite the way it...

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Oi be nowt but an auld country hick,
we a liddle bit of gall, an a lotta stick.
Oi baint niver afeared to speak me mind,
nor critizise folks harshly iffen Oi find
zummit I don’t loik.  Tis...

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UNQUOTABLE QUOTES: XLVII - Tongue Twisters

If you want to « have » your cake and « eat » it at one and the same time, simple enough, just split it into two equal parts like...

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Yukon, Oklahoma was a small rambunctious mining town a hard days ride from Dallas in the days before the car,
Back when genuine doctors were as scarce as honest men - and every other building was...

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Land Is A Loom
I sailed the fiord like inlets between Powell River and Drury Inlet.
The land itself  spoke from mountains, torents, islet
From bird song and bear splashing fishers
From rutting moose and cougars sharp incisors.
The...

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Jimmy Joe McSweeney is a long haired, bearded caveman, who lives in West Virginia…in the hills!
Tales abound from those who claim they’ve actually heard him howl…to finding gruesome remnants of his “kills.”

Some are down right...

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Twilight was softenin’ the warm summer sky
As the sun fled the fields with ‘er gold,
An’ the fellers were gatherin’ for bourbon an’ rye 
Where the tales of McHenry were told.

Whenever the moon was as full...

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Early last October, on a cool and breezeless morning, one o’ my grandsons, Grant, and I had a half a dozen lines 
Bobbin’ near the cattails, in a small secluded bay…catchin’ perch and crappie…when the...

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The “Equalizer”                          



Late last night, at Billy-Bob’s, this little dude...

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Dragon snuck in with the Basement Trolls, to watch a movie, one fine night.
They watched “The Day of the Triffids”, unbeknownst to us, creating our plight.
The next morning all Heck broke loose as we piled...

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The oldest citizen of Soup Creek, Nopaul E. Ticks, posed to show his support for the town council's ban on politicians.

I hear that nasty Trump feller, wants to stump in Soup Creek.
He wrote to Mayor...

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Considering the stories I’ve heard of the past - ‘bout the often wild ways of the west -
The best I remember’s the one where a mob laid an innocent feller to rest.

Into the town rode...

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Hey Feller Where You Goin'
By Roy Merritt

Every time he went by that graveyard 
He would whistle a soothing tune
He wanted to get past that place
And he wanted to do it soon 
He didn’t like goin’...

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Her grand gals axed her one time
How did hers ever gits a date
Her done went ta a all gals school
Theys wudn't let no boys in
Ut makes me's won ders 
Yep ut sure do

Theys at that...

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So you think you know just how us cowboys should behave
But listening to your jawing, I hear Chisholm spinning in his grave
A Cowboy who don’t drink or cuss, I’ll tell you that’s not right
Ain’t you...

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Remember the story 
of Billy Goats Gruff?
The troll under the bridge,
and all of that stuff?
If you liked that old story
it's all good and well,
but it isn't at all 
the troll tale I will tell.

Now, Trolius...

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The work was hard out on the ranch, the days were hot an' dry,
An' fancy things you find in town had caught ol' Jim Bob's eye.
When evenin' came he'd sit the fence an' crave to...

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As thephilosopher  readies for his p soup anniversary 
Remembering he found this place last Christmas Day
Surely the best gift he did receive
Now for some holiday fun, DON”T LEAVE

Denise Narayadu I can't end the line...

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COME ON DOWN TO THE GILDED AGE
By Roy Merritt

Come on down to the Gilded Age 
We’ve crawled our way back
And we’re coming hard and heavy this time
So brace for the attack

Come on down to the...

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Sometimes keeping your tongue straight
is hard when what you got to say is plain
simple and from the heart; not always easy
mustering words that feel the abyss of
living the way fingers know the touch of 
life...

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What chance does a feller have to make it these days?
With so much temptation offered in so many ways.
My spirit was weak and I had a will to commit.
To a Hell raising life free from...

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