Time does not celebrate
Nor sunrise play kazoo
The folly of the “New Year”
Belongs to me and you
The orbiting of Jupiter
The gleaming Milky Way
Know that being where you are
Don’t mean that’s where you’ll stay
For geese will cut the sky with V’s
And bears retreat to slumber
While we are left to pondering
The days we try to number
For time is but a monitor
Of movements without cause
And we the counters of the days
Enshrine time’s timeless flaws
these limericks are for children-but I wanted to share
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there was a baby named Jess
lots of food she would process
into farts and poo
and to burbs and spew
her parents loved her no less
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there once was a pussycat named Stu
who spent a happy day at the zoo
mostly liked the big cats
but laughed at the meerkats
and the monkey blowing a kazoo
One Couple Of Days the sky sprangled tiddle-flop and haze,
We rode a unicorn in socks past singing maize,
We tickled the moon with a rubbery spoon,
Then juggled spaghetti with a jazz kazoo tune.
One Bright Day we saw a frog in a bowtie dance,
It offered us jellybeans from a cloud’s sideways glance,
We soared on toast wings through marmalade trees,
Then chased a giggle-dragon on quivering knees.
Our holiday was musical
(The food was yummy, too)
Because our grandkids each received
A shiny new kazoo.
To add to the festivities,
Another gift revealed
Harmonicas, which both of them
Did very proudly wield.
With latkes, dreidels, presents and,
Of course, the candles lit,
Our Chanukah was lovely and
My cookies were a hit.
We won’t all be together for
The candles left to light,
But the glow will carry forward
From the sweetness of last night.
Perky above board Alice was the one we saw first
Isn’t she the one who used to tease Mrs. Lirst?
No, she’s a good girl, we all like her friendly ways.
The one who tormented Lirst was Pete McVeryWays.
Alice was living up to her name, being funny too.
We watched as she danced and played a wild kazoo.
She is a party animal who makes Wonderland fun!
This sentiment was expressed by almost everyone.
four merry frogs with a hey wheez wiggle wiggle wiggle
Were riding a designer fish down the middle of Lake Gibble
The fish was flopping and floundering as fashion fish do.
The frogs were laughing their guts out, and playing their old kazoo.
It’s the kind of day that other frogs are sitting in their swampy place.
But we are the orchestra of orchestras said frog cousin Mrs. Grace.
The rest of them agreed, as they floated out to sea on the fish.
Just one thing, said a dragonfly stopping by “what is your final wish?”
Top of the Morning to you
It is a beautiful day, right cousin Lou?
Until the parade starts, what shall we do?
We have to entertain ourselves ‘til two.
My idea is to buy corned beef for Sue.
She is the best cook in Kalamazoo.
While it is on simmer, here is what we will do
Round up your harmonica and my kazoo
Top of the morning to you Bonnie McDew
Want to watch the parade with us at two?
You’ve invited too many women already said Lou.
Mrs. McLeary’s cow Bessie went “moo!”
I asked Bessie “Where is your cousin Stew?”
They were always getting into trouble, these two.
The horse tried to tattle, but his super long snout grew.
So I knew he was lying about Bessie and Stew.
There’s a panda tap dancing in hobnails
There’s an octopus mixing up cocktails
A bush kangaroo
Blows on a kazoo
While the band are all tadpoles or pond-snails
A gorilla is dancing the tango
With a chimp who’s still holding a mango
The chimp wins the crown
For getting on down
To the lambada and the fandango
At the bar there’s a drunk alligator
And he’s fancies a croc who’s the waiter
With so many teeth
He knew there’d be grief
So he’s seeing a pelican later
Well the peacock so prim and resplendent
Gave his coat to the cloakroom attendant
Chicks don’t check him out
Because he’s without
His plumage on which he’s dependant
Then the moose said it soon will be nine
Please finish your beer or your wine
It’s eight fifty-eight
His key’s in the gate
So try not to leave any sign
There's a pen near the big rabbit hutch
With a sign saying please do not touch
A young lad from Goring
Said Pandas are boring
They don’t seem to do very much
God save the queen played with flourish on a vibrant, color-soaked kazoo...
He played an Irish Jig
On a battered old Kazoo
Accompanied by his mate
On electric Digeridoo
As the Oomi Oomi birds
Performed a mating dance
You could see them strut
You should see them prance
And the Captain of the Jungle
Sighed with despair
Ran his gnarled fingers
Through his thinning hair
Cleared his parched throat
With a careful little cough
And then being bored
Switched the whole lot off
And the jungle creaked and sighed
And silence fell all around
As bit by bit by bit by bit
The jungle slowly closed right down.
Let us all sing a happy song,
A Jolly national sing along
Melodies of Friendship and Praise
The past is becoming a misty haze,
When we hear voices loud and strong.
Let us all dance today,
Helping our troubles fade away
Dance any way you choose
With bare feet or high-heeled shoes.
Put your talents on display.
Let us all get the beat,
It is cool to feel the heat
Of the beating of drums and vibes too
The sexy saxophone and the Kazoo.
What a glorious musical treat.
Goodness, I've got carried away,
I'm afraid that I have to say,
I used to adore singing and dance
Music still puts me in a trance.
But now, I happily wave and sway.
Brahms pushes a piano into my ear.
I hear the stool creak as he sits.
He does not introduce the music,
he expects me to remember it,
know it, eat it.
He lights up a Havana,
clarinet and violin cough
inside a woody cochlear.
Viola takes hold
of a long nostalgic ligament
loosening a stirrup bone.
Bearded old Brahms
shifts from one large butt cheek
to another,
chords shudder
the music trans-locates us
as we share the lingering hint
of Bratwurst
on his nicotine stained fingers.
Not being musically trained
I am grateful
to accompany a cello and viola
on a kazoo
shaped like a nose.
Our country is in trouble, Hope is eroding
Government's imploding, Crime is exploding
Prices are up the kazoo, ships are waiting in queue
With Russia and China on the move, the USA 'strongly disapproves'
Faith in Washington's at an all-time low
Nothing gets done, or else moves way too slow
As for the Pandemic, it still seems endemic
Wasn't it supposed to be 'over by now'
But never fear, help will surely soon appear
~ Trump vs. Biden in just three short years
pitch black sky
leaves whipped up
wing whistle coo
4/18/2021
Mourning Doves are known for their gentle cooing sounds. The air rushing through these special feathers makes them vibrate and create sound (kind of like a kazoo). The noise is called a wing whistle, and it's part of the Mourning Dove's natural alarm system. What does it mean when you see a mourning dove?
cool air pitch black sky
leaves whipped up by callous wind
wing whistle dove coo
4/18/2021
Mourning Doves are known for their gentle cooing sounds. The air rushing through these special feathers makes them vibrate and create sound (kind of like a kazoo). The noise is called a wing whistle, and it's part of the Mourning Dove's natural alarm system. What does it mean when you see a mourning dove?
In a nutshell ~ haiku is supposed to be an observation of a moment in nature without embellishment, no passing judgment, no use of fantasy or abstract concepts. It's basically two simple ideas with a 'turn' that is essential: it's almost like the punchline of a joke but haiku is not meant to be funny per se.
1. 5-7-5 is the max syllable count
2. NATURE is the subject
3. NO capitalization
4. NO title (if you must, use first word(s) of haiku)
5. NO punctuation unless for the turn
6. NO adjectives or adverbs
7. NO full sentences: It's a poem of few words with much left unsaid
8. MUST have a feeling of the present moment (NO past or future)
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Looking for the formal definition, structure, and history of this poetry form? Visit the Poetry Dictionary entry below. Then return to explore how PoetrySoup members bring the form to life through their own poems.