Humor Life Poems | Examples

List of Member Poems

Premium Member Five Perspectives

Can you believe I finally made it this far? 
Wanna hear my five-year-old birthday dream?
I want a grenade, a pop gun, an exploding cigar, 
milk duds and a cone of chocolate ice cream.

To get to fifteen took me forever. 
Now, I fall in love five times a day at a glance.
I need a birthday miracle that’s clever - 
a way to get in Janet’s pants.

With work and kids, I’m up to my ears. 
How did I get into trouble so deep?
All I want, as I turn thirty years, 
is one night of continuous sleep.

At fifty, it has been such a long road,
and I’ve now lost a bit of my fire.
My ambitions have been somewhat slowed. 
But for college tuition, I’d wish to retire.

Seventy?  How the heck did it come so fast?
The things that I hope for as the sun wanes,
is that this year will not be my last,
and a moment without aches and pains.

Premium Member My Worst Enemy

I'd do it if I could.  I'd commit that awful crime.  
I'd murder my worst enemy.  I would kill time.
I had lovingly honored him and all of his rites -,
the sunrise to start mornings, and sunset to start nights.

I worked every weekday.  On the weekend, I played.
At the end of the month, I'd paid bills and I got paid.
I waited for my birthday and vacations in summer,
I kept rhythm with time, that steady drummer.

At first, that cruel tyrant would slyly pretend
to help me, masquerading as a faithful friend. 
He made me grow tall, graduated me from school,
gave me a wife, a child, and a swimming pool.

That was before he turned nasty - so vile, and so mean,
sending two wives down the road, with a space in between.
He performed evil magic, strange and still stranger.  
One time he turned a sweet kid into a teenager. 

He brittled up my bones, and he bent up my back.
He took my hair and memory and won't give them back. 
While, I've decided to fight my enemy to the end,
we must all remember - time is undefeated, my friend.

Premium Member The Joker

Where’s the gravy train I rode
In those days of waggy tails 
With no thoughts of getting old
And no precious aim to chase
I can’t recognize the wreck
Whose each morning’s waking up
Counts as luckiest comeback
But it’s me with coffee cup
Course I had that vague idea
What those better days acquire
Mary Hopkin puts it clear
There’s no point to join the choir
Days of pleasure, wine and smoke
Days of roses, lovers lanes 
All has gone beyond the joke
Though the joker still remains.


Premium Member A Parent's Love

As parents,
we never know what a child will ask.
All we can do is,
be prepared.
Out of the blue I was asked,
"which one do you love more?"
That was an easy question and answer.
When I give out cookies,
each of you get the same number.
Because I love you each equally.

Premium Member Once Upon A Time

Once upon a time,
they lived,
happily ever after.
Or did they?

Premium Member Another Try At Footle-ing

Shooting Star...
Twinkle
Sprinkle

Limited Technobility...
I'm not
Tech bot

Florescent Headlights...
White light
Too bright

False Teeth...
Denture
Venture

Two Sides Of The Coin...
Heads sails
Sinks Tails

On A Waiting List?...
Patient
Patient 

Gaining Confidence...
Rejoice
Sound voice

Quick Temper...
Fire red
Hot head

Love In The Air...
Souls dance
Romance

Not What You Expected?...
Enlist
Tale twist


Premium Member Fairy Godmother's Downhill Prayer

Wind, please lift this life aloft,
like a leaf that may gently waft 
on a long journey in the sun, 
sailing, twirling, having fun - 
before it lands, light and soft. 

Sky, don't let clouds obscure
this soul like seed with kernel pure
Give it a hundred years.
Drop a modicum of tears,
so it may grow safe and secure.

Wind and sky you must concede
a fairy godmother has her needs,
and I always get my way,
So, here's what I want today:
spinach salad with sunflower seeds.

Premium Member MIRROR My Friend

I see you looking at me,
so cunning and smug.
Must we start our day off like this?
I am your friend, 
please be my friend.
If I smile at you,
will you smile back?
See all it took was a smile.
Now I will be on my way,
 have a great day.

Premium Member When I met the Animals

in my backyard,
where they came looking for me 

The orangutang surveyed the property
from the top of the garden shed

The jaguar looked bored
on the trampoline

The snow leopard walked
figure eights around
the potted tomatoes 

The kangaroo kicked a dingo
and I had to referee  

The albatross wasn't keen on company,
so he danced through the sky 
as if swinging by strings

The anaconda had already eaten
so, he slept beneath the magnolia tree

The giraffe was less than thrilled
with the greens
growing in Greensboro, 
so he scanned the horizon 
for something better

I listened to the unexotic 
Northern Mockingbirds
in the grey branches
and was happy

Premium Member Ubers

In the morning light
his face looked less like the man
she had expected

They lay side by side,
both scrolling through the choices 
that they should have made

Their chemistry, like
a free trial period,
had to be canceled.

She called an Uber
efficient, polite, before
the thought came to him

They'd shared a playlist
that was all breakup songs - which
should have been a clue
.
.
A song for this:
Kiss Me by Sixpence None the Richer

H-E-L-P HOTLINE

Waiting on queue
While life has me blue
Help is on the way
But, seems to stand a million miles away!
Been sitting on queue for hours long
Hearing the same three “PHONE HOLD” Songs!
“Please hold…Your call is important to us!”
Why is it that I can’t get through? I desperately fuss!
As I wait…wait…wait some more
Here it comes again: “The racing thoughts now pour!

At last, a rep answers my desperate call
And I freak out and stand appalled
As she reads from a monotonous script
“Ma’am, please!” I beg as the page she flips!

“Hush, Dear Child!  I am saving your life!”
Without further ado, she shrugs off my gripe,
Returns to her script and resumes her read
Finally, her script ends and I am freed!
From the torturesome monotonous read.
“Now, will you just listen to me?”
To my utmost surprise, she says to me:
“Okey, Dokey!
“Now, let’s wrap this up doing the Hokey Pokey!”

Premium Member A sense of humour is vital

Life's one big practical joke.
I'm standing on top of the world.
Laughter gets me through anything.



Wordku: 5-7-5 words

AP: 3rd place 2026

Premium Member A Daily Respite

I bought a chair to rest my bones,
I call it “Sam”, my vibrating throne.
It hugs my back and holds my drink,
the perfect place to sit and think.
But once I drop onto that seat,
I lose the use of both my feet.
A strong magical embracing force,
locks me inside my lazy course.
I try to rise, I fight that spell,
But in this seat, is where I dwell.
I guess I’m stuck here for the day,
please send snacks rolling my way.

Conversation With My Ex

what I mean to say is this…
well, that’s not exactly what I mean to
say but I’m sure you know
what I mean
don’t you?
well don’t you?

let me put it to you this way…
no, that’s not right
it’s more like…

let me clarify
(although we both know that
clarification is not making
oneself clear, but putting
oneself in the clear}
is that clear?

do you understand
where I’m coming from?
am I making any sense?

let me try one more time
to explain….
or maybe I should put it
this way….

it’s so nice that we can
communicate
so easily

LIFE

Life is a gift, a gift we all can cherish. 
Life can be weird, we can sit and think about all of our moments that sometimes seem unclear. 
Life is a mystery, we try to figure out why we are here. 
Life did not come with a plan, it came suddenly, and we all live and learn. 
Life may sometimes be so fun, we laugh and feel so happy, making us feel amazing. 
Life sometimes feels down, we hang our heads and feel sad, we cry and complain, wanting things to be okay. 
Life may sometimes feel strange, but remember tomorrow is another day. 
So, enjoy every day, and get up if you fall down, don’t give up, change the road you're on, and pick a new path, and forget anything bad. 
Lifting prayers to God, today and always.

Sub Categories

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