Best Humor Life Poems

When my time is done and I am finally laid to rest
I don’t want to be recalled as one who lived life depressed

So as I wrote my will, I chose to leave an instruction
That laughing gas be inhaled by all those at the function

No mournful...

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I can't recall exactly when
Life swung and hit me on my chin
I"m ashamed to say, it knocked me cold
When I came to, I woke up old

While I was out, I had a dream
Of juggling on a balance beam
While jumping hoops, upon one leg
And one wrong...

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Life has many highways,                                         ...

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 In Thrall

I’ve scooped plasma from the sun
To cook meals and heat my bath,
Moved Mount Everest just for fun;
None can ever walk my path.

I’ve had dinner on Saturn’s rings,
Kicked the moon like a soccer ball,
Plucked light rays like guitar strings—
I should adorn the walls of...

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Someone said, Hey Christopher


Someone said, “Hey Christopher,
what’s up with all this love
It seems in every poem
that is all you’re thinking of

Why are you always dreaming,
why is it you can’t see
That love is just a legend,
a made up fallacy

The world is filled with evil,
don’t you watch...

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one sock
three toes showing
darn it


John G. Lawless
©10/18/2019...

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Age is over rated
I went from cute and cuddly
To terribly two
In the flip of a calendar
From being inquisitive
To being nosey
From pre-teen
To A TEENAGER
Meandered
Through the military
Into construction
And against the Vegas spread
Married
And became a father
AGE
That sly bastard
Has made me
A grandfather
And a great grandfather
I have taught them all
To...

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I seem to have misplaced my keys
Could you help me find them please?

They’re not in the house, not in the car
I’ve even looked in my guitar 

It’s as if they’ve gone, in a big black hole
No, I don’t do parties where they go in a...

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He had a few drinks the night before,
enough to mistake the waiter for a door.
T'would help him remember
he thought to himself,
the fun to be had in the coming of day.
He'd married a Madame 
with her perfumes and pearls,
a painted smile
as he watched her walk
with first...

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There once was a farmer named Larry
With a hundred cows at his dairy
Larry did his best
Hired help for the rest
Milking that many cows was scary
...

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The Difference of Distance


The difference between adult and a dolt
is that one will stay the other bolt.




submitted to – The TRUE Meaning of Being Adult
sponsor – FJ Thomas...

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It was a height of 250 metres,
But I wasn’t afraid;
I looked down
And there wasn’t even my shade.

The sun was already jumping
But with a low speed,
“ I can perform better,
 I am not going to give the lead.”

Took a deep breath
And I was in air,
Time stopped,
And...

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From my mother's womb I yelled into the room,
mattress on the living room floor,
my bro I replaced as the youngest, his face
as he screamed and ran out through the door.
I tell you (no fooling) my years of hard schooling
I'll remember as long as I live
Johnny...

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I am tired of making lists for the store,                                    ...

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hello hot flashes   goodbye mad dashes





December 20th, 2018...

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