The so-called "scientists" don't know jack.
Tune out CNN journalists and abandon
The network. It's a mine of misinformation.
Completely reject science; it's totally whack;
Don't believe everything you see or hear.
Whatever you do, do not drink tap water.
The fluoride the previous administrations
Mixed in it, a cognitive frequency trap.
It has to be! My fellow illuminati said so!
Tap water teems with parasitic amoeba.
It's the quickest way to a wicked diarrhea
And a host of other untold ailments.
Ah, yes! Watch out for lead poisoning,
Which killed so many folks in Flint, Michigan.
What? Have you been living under a rock?
Watch out for that abdominal pain
And bloody stool. Oh, you better believe
It was well documented on the dark web.
I'm more informed than the intelligentsia.
Trust me, do not drink tap water.
It contains bacteria and more mercury
Than you'll find in a great white shark.
Only drink bottled water, the Aquafina kind!
Wake up, smell the coffee, you sheeple,
And get with the illuminati program!
I shall not ever swim in seas that swarm with awful fears
I’d never feel at ease in case a great white shark appears
But now there’s a laboratory that can cure my woes
They bring back long dead creatures and, I’m told, everything goes
I don’t care what it costs to bring back the megalodon
This massive shark ate everything and great whites would be gone
So bring back the megalodon to eat all those great whites
Then I can skinny dip again, quite safe, on moonlit nights
It took some time but it’s been done; the Meg now rules the waves
He’s eaten all the creature that sent swimmers to their graves
So now I swim with confidence; the Meg’s been back awhile
And look, I see one coming… don’t you love that gaping smile
high up in the trees
birds stare down poised to attack
black and white terror
great white shark circling
silent deadly predator...
need a bigger boat
in the Bates Motel
psycho killer qu'est-ce que c'est...
don't tell your mother
In a field of golden sunflowers,
Their faces turned towards the sun's warm embrace,
A great white shark glides through the azure depths,
Silent predator with a fearsome face.
A whip-poor-will calls out in the twilight,
Its haunting song echoing through the trees,
A melody of melancholy and mystery,
A whispered secret carried on the breeze.
Flowery words bloom and scatter like petals,
Poetic verses woven with delicate care,
Each line a tapestry of emotions and dreams,
A language of the heart, laid bare.
In this tapestry of nature's wonders,
Sunflowers, shark, whip-poor-will, and words,
A symphony of beauty and danger,
A dance of light and shadow, seen and heard.
Never knowing if the shark will be appearing
Or if the innocent sunflower will bloom
Hope the shark is gone with his jeering
Down where golden sunflower should illume
At dawn I ran from a bear in the park
At noon time I swam from a great white shark
A vulture gnawed on my head
Thinking me tasty and dead
Now my pug's chewing my toes in the dark
11/5/22
Fourth Place
A Funny Limerick -
Make Me Laugh Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Tania Kitchin
Has three thousand jagged teeth to kill prey
Smells blood in the water three thousand miles away
Great white’s keen smell
Sniffs human as well
This salty sweet fragrance can brighten his day
predator
killer, carnivore
stalking, attacking, feeding
lion, great white shark, bait, impala
struggling, detecting, fleeing
hunted, vulnerable
prey
Date created: 05/21/2021
The great white shark of warm seas
that is bluish while still young
becomes whitish as years pass
attacking humans.
Shetah
fiercest warrior of the Andremma Kingdom
When she showed up for the battle, armies surrendered.
Her spirit animals were the wolf spider, phoenix and tiger.
Shetah
wore her assertiveness like armor
When she roared her displeasure, the mountains cringed.
Her familiars were the owl, cobra, and great white shark.
Shetah
eliminated earth’s foes with precision
When she descended into the middle of the wild fires, they cried.
Tears of unhappiness, knowing she would put an end to them
Shetah
traveling from universe to universe
When she appears on earth, she will eliminate the pandemic
I implore her gods and goddesses to hear our plea now.
Adjectives laugh, insisting on their way
Bright eyed ideas determined to stay
Creativity ready to leap and parlay,
Dancing along my dendrite highway
Elusive words rather well fed
Frankenstein fodder explodes in my head.
Grotesque vocabulary parades in my brain.
Hip hop dancers drive me quickly insane.
I eat sixteen sweet rolls, hoping to get fat.
Joking and jumping this way and that.
Kookaburra does knee bends each and every day
Longing to twist me in another creative way
Mysterious mantis is now flying freshly free
Nefarious tentacles swiftly and firmly grab me.
Ostrich in top hat lets out an exasperated sigh.
Purple eggplant pinnacles decorate a warm pie.
Quivering chimps travel in a new outer space.
Responsible llama queens are running in place.
Striped horse pretends now to be a zebra.
Twirling in Africa with a shiny ameba.
Underwater feelings with her weird hums
Vision quests brought on by Cherokee drums.
Walrus and whales summoning a great white shark,
‘Xtraspecial playmates whistling in the autumn dark.
Youth spreading coffee cake around to annoy.
Zealots persuading no one of their frenzied joy.
Crashing through the ocean waves. Seals swimming,seagulls fishing, lazy penguin is delayed. A thousand feet deep under lies a killer whale who died from hunger. Searching in a submarine looks like bits of pieces of the titanic. Too much to fix, screaming voices for a water mechanic. It’s a whole new world under the ocean. Its a upside down world now in motion. Gasping for air staring at a great white shark in a cage. Fear, worrying and overthinking thoughts on how was he staged. Crashing through the ocean waves; Do you think the ocean would be right side up, a new ending world in a million years or days?
Honolulu's Pothole State Park
Is a scary place after dark
With potholes so deep
Anything could creep
From octopus to Great White Shark!
One thing about the Great White Shark
Its size is bigger than its bark
But when its mouth
Is heading South
You'll wish it stayed on Noah's Ark!
Depression is a great white shark
who navigates the green sea of my emotions
ravaging parts of my aching heart
with his teeth absorbed in bitterness and loneliness
leaving behind shipwrecks of life struggles
and broken relationships in his wake
I am floating lazily in the ocean, enjoying myself when I suddenly realize…
I am wearing a Band-Aid,
A Band-Aid over a small cut.
Doo doo doo doo
Doo doo doo doo
I suddenly remember that a great white shark can smell a drop of blood
More than a mile away.
Doo doo doo doo
Doo doo doo doo
I also remember that a great white has huge teeth that have serrated edges.
Doo doo doo doo
Doo doo doo doo
“GET ME OUT OF HERE!” I yell at my surprised husband, who
Has walked into the bathroom.
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