Dark Humor Poems - Poems about Dark Humor

The vanity of youth is at it’s height when its weight is carried light. It’s an accidental manifestation of another’s envious estimation. It’s lasting value, less than a mirage, disappears with bitterness into old age. To those who took the lie for truth when told in their vanity of youth must now in beauty’s absence live a lie impossible to forget or forgive. ...

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Philbert’s in a state euphoric, and why not? After years of burning academic oil, a PhD he’s got! But a PhD these days – as he is finding out – guarantees no job security, and even lesser clout. Resumé after resumé, interview after interview, Philbert sits and waits for his dream job to come through. Student loans with rising interest...

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Drugstore parking lots these days are far more crowded than houses of religion! And with more people suffering legions of physical and mental problems, are we justified to ask the question with a chill: has the modern pill become the new gospill? ...

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Nature was selfishly deficient in denying beauty to Millicent. Men rarely offered her a glance, unless by accident or chance. And though she lost out as a wife she made up for it with a lavish life, accruing things she loved and more, things women beg their husbands for, and lived with an untroubled mind (unlike other women of her kind). And when they...

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A lady at a coffee shop was sobbing. Another lady, a Good Samaritan, said gently: May I be of help, madam?” “Not really,” she said, “it’s really nothing. My husband...an accident...this morning, fatal, and finally.” “Oh, I am so sorry,” said the lady offering her sympathy hoping she might lessen the lady’s grief. “Oh please, don’t be. My tears...

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To soften his adolescent growing pains he was encouraged (can’t recall by whom) to take up painting – to make a name for himself, they said. When that failed, and miserably, he took up drinking which he likened not to a godsend, rather to a bodily need and calling. And so it was, for in little time he...

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Like herbicides and pesticides and other chemical deterrents advertized to keep certain foods looking perfect and free of any blemish or defect will in time (like any other crime) increase the grower’s wealth but decrease the consumer’s health. The result? World-wide suicides offering the only sane alternative to suffering. ...

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It may seem a cruel tragedy that Amherst’s greatest poet Emily Dickinson never got to marry though she burned ardently to be. And yet in Death (if you’ll allow) she did eventually get laid – not in a man’s bed but a pine box and (if you’ll allow) this paradox she still remains a chaste old maid. ...

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Things are not making sense, and I am questioning if my reality is so because I thought it in to being. Am I the only one hearing the truth? Am I the only one believing? I think I am in need of a witness. Archons deceive souls using the illusion of separation. The mind is the sole...

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All the fairytale violence Life’s too Grimm already s o i c a n’ t i ...

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In the world of Flydom false religion is compared to spiritual contagion. Baalzebug alone is god, hence heresy exists only as a rare possibility. Hence, there are no crazed fanatics to stoke the flames of heretics, no gruesome hangings, no quarterings, no cheering public beheadings. Yet compared to such gory executions condemned flies prefer two common substitutions: the sudden swap they never get to hear and...

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What could be more pleasurable than this? I muse to myself as I reminisce, when each limb was pulled by a diff'rent horse, that magic time when I went through divorce. I am roused from protective amnesia, my heart yanked out without anesthesia. Mona Lisa, a destroyed work of art, I picked up my brush for a brand new...

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What if the orbiting earth were to unexpectedly run into a brick wall speeding through the galaxy one night in the middle of Fall? Can you imagine the sounds of death, destruction, and annihilation as Christchurch, New Zealand, crashes into the Atlanta Metro bus station? I don’t think that that would be any fun ~ at all! ...

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When a pastor asked a lady if she was planning a trip down under she hesitated: Yes, I am, she said nervously. It’s my first trip to Australia if that’s what you mean at least that’s what I hope. Yes, that’s exactly what I meant he reassured. By-the-way, I’m a pastor. I thought you looked familiar she said eagerly. And though I’m not a congregant...

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A burial, if you’ll pardon my irreverent though jocular pun is truly a groundbreaking event. ...

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