Along the Appalachian trail
was a leftover petrified bale
on top stood a lonely quail
looking sturdy, in no way frail
also left was a loaf of bread, stale
according to my goofy cousin, Dale
Always good for stories without fail
comedienne after his stint in jail
next to the straw bale was a grail
Dale thought it was carved in shale
he heard a coyote’s drawn-out wail
it came to him on a gusty gale
He nibbled on a piece of kale
which he had found in a wooden pail
soon he felt hearty and hale
is this the end? asked the inquisitive quail
all genius includes a bit of madness
she’s a loon, they say, touched, odd
because she is an original, a comedienne,
an artist, a painter, a singer, a dancer
none of these things make money, they say
she’s abnormal, perhaps the biggest compliment of all
a quintessential her-own-person woman,
mad to you, sane to those who truly know
everyone who ever did anything notable was a bit odd
Columbus thinking the world was round? That was crazy.
The inventions of iron, incubator and vacuum – insanity
never question the importance of a little lunacy.
Wait. To you, she's “La Lopez”. To me, “Jen”, always.
Doyenne of “Anaconda”. A date, indeed!
You’d have me narrate the gravamen,
say how it was? She was a ten. Great, she seemed.
Or perhaps an eight. But never again!
Well, she doesn’t like real men. Cheapskate, too.
I’ll tell you straight, it all went bandy when,
as our train pulled out of Penn, to celebrate ‘us’,
she called her lawyer. I hate zen precepts,
but marriage? With no debate? Comedienne!
I asked my girlfriend- when is your birthday again/
then, she told me March 1st my dear, that's when
around the room I marched first
my girlfriend let out a burst...
and shouted, WOW...you're a comedienne
hexastich with rhyme
I drink my coffee standing on alert
knowing that my tasks move this chunk of dirt
on its axis... my world, my family.
Of necessity, I grab at moments
attacking life (with God) at faith's expense
wringing out each ounce of kids' energy.
I am a mother raising young children
as a chef, cop, coach, and comedienne.
Past these headwinds, I see in the distance -
a doting old grandma, coffee in her hands
Bible in her lap, waiting in the stands
sharing words worthy of God's remembrance.
what’s my sign
what a fool
‘kick my behind’
they thought me
a tool
scalped by the scalpel
forsooth
the sore truth
the eyesore
galoot
the prophecy foretold
as they pinned
the tail-on-the-donkey
hee haw
the jokes on them
as i was peeved
they were
pie’d
this fool
ain’t
no fool
fee-fi-fo-fum
i
one-upped
‘em
as Edith Ann*
rocks
in her rocker
with
a raspberry roast
“…and that’s the truth”*
6/6/2023
Edith Ann character of comedienne Lily Tomlin
A sweet poetess, most worth reading!
Not only prolific, but in her heart-moving words, terrific.
She waltzes far above professorial,impressive words,
Expresses herself above overdone imagery, that is absurd.
Does not try to be a poetic comedienne!
But pours her soul’s stars out, as softly as she can.
A great poetess, I am happy to say.
As sure as the sun rises, she lifts my soul each day.
How I admire her tender, genuine humility!
A woman who was raised with utter gentility.
Eve enjoys humanity, it’s so wonderfully obvious.
Roses to you, Eve~ we find you, a poetess, glorious!
With love and respect, Panagiota
7-6-2022
~1~
.
She is a comic.
A comedienne.
You will not be able to stop laughing.
I am an empath.
I meet her and feel powerfully sad.
She has perfected the cover up.
Covering up her anguish with jokes.
Covering up her disappointment by uplifting others.
I have to get away, for her sorrow is too deep.
Being an empath, I recognize despair
When I hear it laugh.
I have recognized many old ladies, but I know two of them.
They were Florence and Duno, both crackerjacks.
Their sense of humors rose in the sky and went to Jupiter.
I saw lots of old ladies with lavender hair and lavender dresses at church.
They sat with their half way hose sticking out below the knee.
It was a funny sight, but we dared not snicker.
I had no idea old ladies could be funny until I met Florence.
Which is why I gave Duno a chance. Florence was a story teller.
Duno was a comedienne. They got me over my fear of old ladies.
Now I am the old lady, sitting with burgundy hair,
Trying to not giggle at silly stuff,
But not at church.
A doctor checked tears of men and women
And labelled them as tear-cock and tear-hen;
Tear-cock often cackled;
Tear-hen looked so baffled;
Doctor giggled like a comedienne.
QUIN-TO your five line Poetry Contest
Contest sponsor: Brian Strand
Nov. 21, 2020
(Originally the poem submitted to the following contest on Aug. 28, 2020)
Syllable count: 10, 10, 6, 6, 10 (I used howmanysyllbes.com to count syllables.)
*A 4th Place Win* in the following contest (judged on Sept. 6, 2020)
Aug. 28, 2020
Limerick Fun Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Tania Kitchin
There was a Tilley Willy in her back
It was a seasoned one with pneumonia hack.
Sasha had been trying to shake it since lunch
It had grown up with the McMillian bunch.
It had tentacles that wrapped around her twice.
Tilley Willy thought living inside her was truly nice.
Other humans and dogs have ticks, lice and fleas.
She kept begging it to leave using manners and please.
The Tilley Wiley was determined to stay forever
Then she met a comedienne quite nice and clever
So she encouraged Sasha to stand really close
And that Tilley Wiley jumped from host to host.
Sasha’s pneumonia promptly and abruptly went away
The comedienne had a ridiculous cold the very next day.
The holidays would leave no room
for cutting calories.
Totie Fields,
we laughed a ton.
Not a breeze to go from two twenty
to two nineteen,
the wise guy comedienne
would surmise.
6/20/2019
*1970’s Comedienne - The price of her book on amazon $227!
Why Oh Why Oh Me.
Oh why oh why do have so much bad luck
My hands are tied
My feet are stuck
I’d be much better off being Mr Bean
Or Donald duck
Than me
I try so damn hard to move forward
But I always get knocked back
And if the road ahead was paved with gold
I’d fall between a crack
Nothing goes right
Everything goes wrong
I’d come last in my own lookalike completion
And I’m as popular with women
As King Kong
Why me what did I do wrong?
I feel like a caged songbird
Who never had a song
I wanted to be an Eagle
But I'm more like a Beagle
With a very wet nose
I’m fed up and frustrated
Condemned and so underrated
Unwanted just not good enough
A hasbeen an emotional punch bag
A failed comedienne
Without a gag
A sinking ship
A Rat caught in a trap
Ten steps forward a hundred back
An unwanted puppy
Drowning in a sack
A penniless beggar
With an empty cup
Only dark clouds and rain
When I look up
A prisoner on death row waiting to die
With no lookalike
Why oh why me
Cursed at birth
To live a life of misery.
Peter Dome©2019.
“Seriously,” the comedienne rasps: “can we talk about coffee?!”
The palms of my feet grind the beans in my sleep.
My bathrobe ties dangle, my hair’s unbrushed.
Can of spinach don’t do much, but caffeine aroma lifts me up.
The tilt wand opens my eyes, i can barely see through the slats
Sweet savory cream kisses my Olive Oil lips, Popeye laughs,
“A-gah-gah-gah-gah-gah!”
After two gallons, the pull cord opens the theatrical blinds, full strength.
Kim Rodrigues © 2017
Popeye and Olive Oil are cartoon characters created by Elzie Crisler Segar
my soul is so light right now
while sharing a cookie shake with you
at first you gave me the strangest of looks
you felt the embrace of my enthusiasm
then you opened your mind
your shield is so dissipated right now
as i check out the latest lyrics to your latest song
at first i roll my eyes thinking you were the latest comedienne
i felt the sincere enticement of your passion
then i opened my eyes
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