Best Puddy Poems
I’m Tweety Bird and ‘I tawt I taw a puddy tat,’
But what I mean, Trump’s nightmares fear a democrat,
I’m as yellow as your hair, tweet,
Feel sure you dye it fair, tweet,
Vulgar antics towards opponents, shows lack of morality
Fake tan, untruths, arrogance and more, sadly your totality.
Become a mature American leader Mr. President,
Your unacceptable rapport with world leaders has evil intent,
Sorry, you are just a reality show,
A favour, take a bow and go,
You fuel Racism, Feminism, Semitism, encourage Supremacists,
Build a wall, which Mexicans dig under, such a hedonist!
President-elect Tweety Bird, stop your victimization, it’s become boring,
Debateable If you possess, any political finesse, for war hoping?
Hurriedly looking for a vaccine,
I Tweety Bird, first in line,
Side effect, maybe both of us losing our yellow fluff!
Would discuss climate change, but know you’ve abandoned this, rough!
saw blue peek out - yesterday.
what? you say:
i tawt i taw a puddy tat.*
i did! i did!*
and white and purple clouds,
for realz,*
can’t make this up.
and yet, today,
the sky is made of steel,
so back to
same old same old.*
at least the trees
remain in the same
bat time bat place*
and
i got you babe.*
1/31/2020
References to:
1.Warner Brothers Sylvester and Tweety Bird
2.1960’s Batman
3.Sonny and Cher song “I Got You Babe”
4.Miscellaneous slang
Otay! I’m an alien, toe what?
I used to wive on the pwanet Pwuto
Too told! TOE, I fwew to the moon
BOOOW-ING! (Eveeting too white!)
Toe I fwuttered down to Waw Tageles
Where I betame a BIG movie tar
Dey trew a party for my pwemier
but a bwack fuwwy fewine cwashed it!
Yep, I taw dat puddy-tat teak in too
Den he tunned me wit his tun gun!
Wucky for me, I dot away tumhow
Now I got dis widdle speech intetiment…
PS: Ewmer Fudd and me have become wather cwose since then because he had a
similar expewience when Bugs Bunny conked him on the head with an oversized
cawwot...
quatrains with palindrome and onomatopœia
I thought I saw a puddy tat. Was it a cat I saw?
We got one of those curtain things so Simon Dog can come
and go without our bother, when we are busy at home.
Quick-quick, click-click, stick-stick, the neighbor cat watches in awe.
I thought I saw a pretty hat. Was it a hat I saw?
Simon Dog has chased after things since he was just a pup
And though he's seventy in people years, he still jumps up
announcing, bouncing, pouncing all his trophies with his paws.
I thought I saw a piper's rat. Was it a rat I saw?
Lately, Simon doesn't seem as hungry as he's used to
I guess it could be his old age, or maybe stomach flu?
Quick-quick, click-click, stick-stick, the magnets keep that curtain taut.
I thought I saw a spotted bat. Was it a bat I saw?
Simon's not the only one attracted to this curtain.
Diversion and delight offer exercise it's certain -
bouncing, pouncing, announcing a treasure he's not yet caught.
written 5 March 2016
Jerry
George
Kramer
Elaine
They're my favorite show about nothing;
my jolt of funny,
my cup of insane
They're my telly four friends,
who are the nuttiest
A distinct comedic blend
of vaudeville vamped sluttiness
I love 'em to death,
they make me laugh so hard
Insane of the hare brain
is their ensemble calling card
Jerry Seinfeld:
the ringleader, the funny man
George Constanza:
best friend with the simple plan
Kramer Cosmos:
weird and wacky, dresses oh so tacky
Elaine Benes:
best girl ever in the mold of Dennis the Menace
Jerry and George,
Kramer and Elaine
Everything you wanted to know about nothing ...
blank pictures in a cranial frame
Then come plunk your money down,
and taste this cup of cappuccino insane
The four stars are truly iconic,
but they got memorable supporting characters too:
David Puddy and Mr. Peterman,
George's parents, Frank and Estelle
Jerry's parents, Morty and Helen,
Lloyd Braun and Jackie Chiles
are an odd assortment of characters as well
If you've never seen it,
check out the show
Here's a few of my favorite episodes:
The Little Kicks
The Apology
The Puffy Shirt
The Serenity
Now funny is always fresh,
and funny is always good
Here's a few more episodes,
now that you're laughing like I knew you would
The Foundation
The Library
The Strong Box
The Soup Nazi
Should you let this zany crew
become a part of your must-see view
Have a blast,
have a ball
Just be prepared
to be left in stitches and all
Jerry
George
Kramer
Elaine
They're my favorite show about nothing,
my favorite cup of insane
The Ballad of Stinking Mick
Now Mick hung close to a Butt verbose,
And the cheese it ran like treacle,
Some said it was on the bloody nose,
That he lived, was thought unbelievable,
For he was a hairy Wombat Louse,
Hitchhiking on a vehicle,
He tried sucking up to a Mouse,
got dislodged by a Gay Boll Weevil,
There came a blast, hot and sticky cast,
Aroma, most unpleasant,
With bowel movement, he was passed,
Hot an steamy, flavoured, masked?
Mick thought it effervescent,
He’d spring and slide upon the tide,
His gumboots trickled full, (Kiwi slippers)
On a passing Rat he snagged a ride,
High speed, for a Wombat Louse,
I aint being snide, no bloody Bull,
On a Tom-Tit sure he’d been before,
The Wren had flown him high,
Caught by a Cat, he did attack,
with some ten thousands more,
Puddy left with an open jaw,
Thought and pondered bloody sure,
Perplexed with thoughts of why?
The food was flapping high,
The itch stuck in his craw?
Poor puddy bloody paw,
Was reduced to sigh
Should I this underscore,
apply?
This part I will deny,
No lice no bloody moer….( new aussie slang)
Don Johnson
*Image of Conhece-te a ti mesmo (Know thyself) by Pinterest.
Frisky as Two-Year-Olds
HIM: Anything unputdownable?
HER: Yes, and you?
HIM: Lucky, we're here, we'll continue indoors ... and leave the book!
HER: Don't forget the kids, I'll carry Puddy-Tat upstairs ...
HIM: I'll persuade Pup-Tart outside.
HER: Meet you at the rendezvous!
2022 July 25
*3rd Place*
Short verse inspired by pictures
~~Lisa YY: Judged 2022 August 09
*PS Grammar; 40 words exact
Sylvester the Cat,
the lisping schemer, would get smashed flat
by Granny swinging her broom in a rage
when he tried to lunch on her bird in a cage.
Tweety Bird,
clever canary, spoke when danger occurred.
Inside his cage the wee, wary one sat
and said, “I tawt I taw a puddy tat!”
September 2, 2021
entered in the Cleritoons contest
Sponsor: Joseph May
REMEMBER WHEN WE PLAYED WITH SILLY PUDDY,
COPYING THE SUNDAY CARTOONS.
WE STRECHED IT, ROLL IT, BOUNCE IT,
WE SHOWED IT, TO ALL AND WHAT IT COULD DO.
BOY!, DO I MISS IT.
WONDER IF I CAN I STILL GET IT.
I'LL HAVE FUN SHOWING WHAT IT CAN DO,
PLAY WITH IT, WITH MY NIECE AND NEPHEWS.
he was there just like before
my mind wandered
as he gazed
out the window
as traffic approached
he opened his jacket
retrieving a pack of cigarettes
Winston's his favorite brand
he would tap the butt
on the table top
suddenly he took out a match book
revealing the red stick
igniting the tobacco flashes before me
as screams evolved my space
a man a match a blaze
my eyes wide shut
as he controlled the town with his
hands sirens sounded amidst
mayhem chaos and confusion
he had killed again
forcing me to witness
his wrath once more
one man one match one blaze
he had captured me now
there was no turning back
this I knew full well
he would end my life
why if I ever tell
why that would be revealing hell
suddenly his eyes turn to coal black
the darkness covered the diner
as men played pool gathering sticks
and cubes my mind wandered
my eyes watching the match
meanwhile the gravity began to pull me
from a standing position leaning
against a bathroom stall
i had heard the plot the plans
the wretchid toiling of souls
thee arsonist drooled over pages
blue prints and eviction notices
that read code enforcement
his finger tips were thick full of fungus
i arose from a stand still when he announced
the demolision of a rotten hotel
claiming his insurance taxes
surely the tenants would pay dearly
on this autumn day he collected dynamite
copper wires and lot's of mud and puddy
destruction would occur from a single match
souls began to reach for me one by one
the counting of 8 lives to perrish on this date
fearless he approached the workers you you and him
i remember thinking oh how grim
one man sitting with two eyes of dark coals
one man one match 8 souls
You sashay on by me
your nose in the air
a glance of dismissal
in those green eyes you wear
Enticing me more with
your lack of concern
Your show of indifference
Only makes my heart yearn
So I bow to your wishes
I bow to your whims
But find myself here
Stuck out on a limb
Trying to claw my way in
Oh…why do you scorn me?
What else can I do?
O Puddy Tat…Puddy Tat
I love you
Thufferin thuccotath... that's dethpicable!
Of courth you know thith meanth war!!!
Did I hear you thay I thound like a puddy cat?
Thure no mithaking my dethpicable roar!
Hims a cute, him so sweet and pretty cat
Kitty kitty liver spots from over drinking
Hanging out down town at the local litter box
Whiskey sours and meows by the hour
He calls his children kittens
They look cute too in their little fur suits
Puddytat gets drunk as hell
Sharpened whiskers, claws and teeth come out
Tell a tale of something else
Appearances are everything in the alley
Guns and weapons are ready
Kitty kitty sports a small black marble
Where there once was an eye lost in a fight
A pirates patch covers the past as he goes by
Cat keeps the other eye out for murder
But only when he's sober
Nine lives and nine rounds of live ammo
Locked and loaded for battle
Never bring a knife to a cat fight
Cats fire at will when having fun
Using paws because they have no fingers
Not even one
Authors note: I thought I saw a puddy cat. You did...You did see a puddy cat!
Being shy Sassy used to run and hide
when a stranger she would spy
But the two old boys had none of that
they would eagerly go on a barking attack
Sassy watch them having fun
and before you knew it she was the one
Prowling the yard listening to hear
anything approaching to bark at with cheer
Being ornery I would point and shout
bad old puddy tat when a stray one was about
Sassy would see and bark in delight
as the scared cat would scurry off in fright
If stray dogs ever abound I would point and shout
doggie and Sassy barking and running with clout
So often did I do this now it seems in a way
Sassy knows the meaning of the words I say
For if no cat is around saying puddy tat
Sassy looks for a cat to bark at
Same goes for doggie she springs to bark
but if not one there it saddens her heart
So I only say doggie and puddy tat
when there are stray dogs and cats
So Sassy can run and bark at them
brings her joy as her tail is a wagging.
Thinking perhaps that I was in love with myself ?
Mommy's precious baby daddy's little boy; bravely
Marching down their hallway tiny sword unsheathed
As swirling through the air; past her photographs these
Memories when I thought I saw a puddy kat disappearing
Beyound this blue door ? Holding my Bobby tight whispering
Into his furry eager ears; Sssssh, while tiptoing to her magical..
Mirrors where a thousand tales we have told ? Tis not I she cried.