Best Policy Poems
She may be shaped like an apple or a pear
But this query may be asked in the world out there
It’s not a question you can easily dismiss …
Tell me does my bum look big in this?
She smiles sweetly and awaits your reply…
Tell me guys are you honest – or would you lie!
24th January 2015
Silence is the best policy to enjoy the naked...........Sky
MysticMisfits™ Return Policy
(Cursed Edition)
--for when you regret your haunted impulse buys but the universe has other plans.
Please read carefully. Some conditions may apply to your soul.
1. No Refunds, Ever.
You bought it. It’s yours.
Even if it blinks at night.
Even if it follows you home.
Even if it whispers things you really don’t want to hear.
2. Exchanges Must Be Approved by a Sentient Mirror
To initiate a swap, present your item to the mirror in Aisle 7.
If your reflection nods and steps out of frame,
you may proceed.
If it sighs or bleeds, exchange denied.
3. Store Credit May Be Issued
…but only in dreams,
and only in the form of cryptic symbols
you’ll spend the next three lifetimes deciphering.
4. No Returns on the Following Items:
Cursed Lip Balm (LipHex™)
BoneTone™ Music Boxes that have learned your name
Anything that hisses when touched
Items marked “Oops”
Teacups that show you your childhood regrets
5. Return Portal Hours:
Open: Tuesdays, 3:33 AM to 3:34 AM
Closed: All other times, including holidays and emotional breakdowns.
6. By entering the shop, browsing this catalog, or thinking about a MysticMisfits™ product too hard, you agree to the following:
You may become part of the store inventory.
You may forget your own name, but remember ours.
You may not get what you wanted…
…but you will get what you deserved.
All sales final. Side effects include regret, possession, and occasional enlightenment.
More fine print coming soon... check back for policy updates and new questionable hires.
Thank you for shopping at MysticMisfits™.
We hope to see you again. Soon.
Say what you want about China's Family Planning Policy
regarding one child only to be born into a family.
This is a responsibility that we all should embrace personally
but it will most likely be enacted into law eventually universally
otherwise we're going to overpopulate ourselves right into poverty.
Our entire planet will be destined to be
one big mother of a third world country,
and that's why I got a vasectomy.
All immigrants or persons migrating into Australia shall be extended no more courtesy that the average Australian unless unusual circumstances can be justified
No financial aid will be offered to any person migrating to Australia unless unusual circumstances can be justified
24 months after becoming an Australian citizen will be first time a migrant shall be allowed to claim for any financial assistance of any sort from the Australian government unless unusual circumstances can be justified
All Australian traditions, icons, beliefs, and religions shall not be defaced in any way; if they are then the person or persons responsible shall be required to leave Australia and citizenship and passport will be revoked unless unusual circumstances can be justified
All immigrants shall follow Australian law
No employer shall be allowed to pay a migrant a lower rate of pay than an ordinary Australian would receive in the same position in accordance to the award wage. If an employer is found guilty of underpaying workers they shall be shipped to PNG and passport revoked after reimbursing twice the amount of money owed unless unusual circumstances can be justified
if you want us to hit all those targets each day
to hell with ice breakers pie charts and role play.
if you think we should 'focus' and fall into line
quit stealing our watches to tell us the time.
if you see us nod silently during your 'show'
just know we'll forget what's been said when we go.
if you make it appear we've devised your new rules
we'll simply remember you took us for fools.
look, if you want us to work in the ways that you've said
what's wrong with a 'please' and a 'thank you' instead?
What Trump Wants: according to John Kelly- Retired Four-star General Trump’s former Chief of staff
—Unchecked power
—Praise of Hitler
—Dictator for a day
—Complete command over our Military
—"Stupid people, our General’s aren’t even General’s”-Daddy Don
—Military against the people
—a new Constitution
Look yonder y’all
to a mighty military
which will answer to me
I’m your fearless leader
in perpetuity
No need to put much emphasis on likability
Despite my personality, I’m in command
It’s an end to all wars, just don’t mind the
chaos I caused while in charge
Some will starve, like those in Gaza
No one that matters,
No bleeding hearts
in my penthouse plaza, I luxuriate here
Jauntily goosestepping
My soldiers march alongside me in lockstep
They do as I say
Pay no heed to the constitution
I did it my way
What you want is fearlessness
Ignore my derangement, put it aside!
Policy is more important, deport everyone
There’s no place to hide
Policy not feelings, policy not emotions!
Not a sentient human being.
by I Am Anaya
My Dear Leader
I have no emotion, I have no feeling
Sentimentality and compassion are weak
So stifle such mush when you speak!
Vermon sneak in, a toxic flood
Poisoning our pure untainted blood!
We shall seek and destroy the enemy within
In lockstep we'll wipe out their sin!
by RG
A lonely forlorn figure stands, shoulders slumped, life's energy sapped. A Face much older than the years, looks up at the arrival board, delayed not coming, lost walks in a daze, a mind crash too! Called to a meeting they all file in, media in a frenzy.
A zillion cameras flash, she hears the words the flight is missing, thinks of the pain when he was born, and the joy as she first held him to her breast. A room full of love, he grew so quick from infant to toddler, and high school student. She watched over him as only a mother can do. It was only a holiday trip, his dream.
Now the lites of the cameras flash, experts talk of this and that, transponders turned off, plane way off course. She holds the feeling with in, stands with hand in air, every one looks at her silent dignified despair. The Prime Minister says, "Yes, Mam!" The room so silent now, a voice only a child could know filled the room every one taken a back. "Please Sir, do you best, remember me today he is only nineteen and all that I have not a passenger or member of the crew, and for all mothers I speak, not passengers or crew but some one loved, just like your mother loves you!"
With that she turned as a zillion camera lights flashed, as she slowly made her way from the room, no answer expected in her heart she knew, never to see the smile squeal of toddler delight all that makes a mothers life.
Aircraft missing, transponders turned off, media circus now in flight, questions to her from left and right, tight lipped she remained, walks slowly on, thinks five or ten years from now, yesterday's headlines forgotten and gone, but in her mind only nineteen and gone...
... Let's use our logic to determine
- - It's long overdue - -
We need to open the borders
It's time for business to thrive once more
Tourism definitely experienced suffering enough
- - Let's lobby for this - -
Lots of people will be reunited with loved ones
Schools now functioning in full force
Simple shopping trips completed quickly
- - Government, Get it done!! - -
Trucks no longer need to pile up in queues by the border
Goods delivered more quickly to distributors
Citizens smoothly flowing from one county to the next
- - We're without much sense - - -
To think the virus won't return in some dimension
Undoubtedly it will worm its hideous germ in further from here
Possibility of complete suppression is ridiculous!
- - The cure is nigh, don't worry - -
Together, our country will see brighter horizons
Indeed, the entire World will see heightened benefits
Of the sensible policy to reopen closed borders
* * 'A' Lipogram * *
27th August 2020
The 1AC is a shot in the dark.
When we use interrogative strategies
we create zones of visibility and possibility.
The potentiality for deliberation
towards a new politic.
The study of bare life signals
radical transformations;
The constitutive ambiguity of theory
is never clear-- is always double
Thinking of thinking;
A reflection that interrogates
the link between life and politics.
The relation between power
is complicated to consider.
The most authentic paradigm:
Sovereignty corresponds to ability
And ability not to be: a state of exception.
An act is sovereign when it realizes itself.
Bodies are made intelligible
through visibility and value.
When these components
are removed, what is left?
Operating in the shadows,
the truth often stays hidden
Fights break out like
“walking on minefields.”
Silently governed interests
implement policy which
silently neglect populations
further into the margins.
The bodies of the victims
emphasize this state of
exception making it more difficult
to identify, articulate and critique.
There are rare but significant attempts
to conceive the indistinguishably
between law and life.
Debate helps curtail individual power:
to shape behaviors and attitudes,
to be made visible and speak to the
systemic character of American injustice.
The possibility to fill the void
and mitigate impact of fighting.
Education can have a
dramatic impact. Mental
stimulation and meaningful
human interaction cause
social connection,
Zones of indistinction
regain the meaning they lost.
The key is to create alternative
conceptualizations of self
in relationship to others.
With broad political and social
movements standing behind,
uniting the call on the part of
democratic transformations.
Any radical change will be
more than cosmetic.
Young people now carry the banner
of struggle. Of democratic life.
A variety of discourses developed
to avert stemming the flow--
reverting to secrets we do not know.
Claiming that debaters can “solve”
by repeatedly rejecting and interrogating
the tradition is a key strategy in creating
new modes of being the secret to every exception.
How it unfolds remains to be seen.
Few chairs are there.
Few got their seat
but many are standing in the queue to get a chance.
Those who got chairs became chairpersons,
they will never let others to sit even for a while.
I managed a chair
but I am not happy.
During my childhood I thought-
I will allow others, who are standing,
to sit on my chair at least for one minute
irrespective of gender, age, caste, creed, religion, race, ethnicity, land.....
I will keep on standing throughout my life with a stick-
it’s not for support but to break the legs of those (chairpersons),
who will wish to rest their legs on my chair finding it vacant.
Now I wish to become a carpenter!
All will sit first, after that all will rest their legs also.
A wingding Aussie will be defined as any single person thru to a minority group determined to be making a complaint containing false information or complaints of no substance about businesses, governments, government employees, organizations or not for profit organizations and if approaching the government requiring changes made to any official documentation they shall be known as Dead Beats
If the changes or complaints are deemed to be unsuitable, not required, or of no substance, the person or each person in the group complaining or requesting the modifications/changes will be billed $150.00 a day per person involved in the investigation, from the initializing of an investigation to and including the day of finalization. Weekends and public holidays shall be included at normal overtime rates
Every member of the Dead Beat group shall be individually billed. The bill shall be known as the Dead Beat Bill (DBB)
If any member of the Dead Beat group is found to be in Australia on a visa of any sort and receive a DBB they shall also be required to hand in their visa and leave Australia
Examples of complaints:
A complaint about the noise from an airport, industrial area, recreational area or club that was established before the residence moved into or was born into the neighbour hood of complaint is a complaint of no substance unless unusual circumstances can be justified
Applications for a shopping center, house, building, park or religious area that require a town meeting shall be known as unsuitable complaints unless unusual circumstances can be justified
Dress or language complaints about Australian icons such as Bugs Bunny, Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Humphrey B Bear and others shall be deemed not required groundless unless unusual circumstances can be justified
Adding amendments to a legal document that require changes to Australian beliefs, customs, traditions or icons shall be deemed unsuitable, not required and of no substance unless unusual circumstances can be justified
Any Australian government employee that fits these requirements shall also resign from their position unless unusual circumstances can be justified
Great nation enslaved to sheiks -
It fights the liberation
Of itself! Freedom beckons -
We need but the will to move.
Special Needs Education Policy 1968
The session paper 5 of 1968, a turning point so grand,
A moment in history that improved the lives of many, a stand.
For special needs education in Kenya, it paved the way,
A brighter future for all, where everyone could learn and play.
Gone were the days, where children with special needs,
Were left behind, their futures filled with all too many weeds.
With session paper 5, came a change, a brand new start,
A path to inclusion, where every child had a place in the heart.
From classrooms to resources, the improvements were clear,
Supporting children with special needs, so they could live without fear.
With trained teachers and specialized equipment, the future was bright,
Giving children with special needs, a chance to learn and take flight.
Now, years later, we see the fruit of that session paper 5,
With schools and resources, providing the support to help them thrive.
No longer left behind, they can learn and grow,
Their futures filled with hope, where they can reach their full potential, and so.
So let us celebrate the session paper 5 of 1968,
For giving children with special needs, a brighter future, where they can all win.
A turning point in history, that made a difference, no doubt,
A brighter future for all, with improved special needs education about.
By Otieno Elvis Gikoi
*THE ELO’S POETRY*
There was a time we were independent,
exporting energy out to the world.
Natural gas helped make us ascendant,
before the energy plan was unfurled.
Clean coal is indeed oxymoronic,
but our technology, better than most.
Nuclear probably is the world's tonic;
solar won't get you a night on the coast.
Shutting down pipelines, pleading with Saudis,
suspending drilling on government land…
With these pump prices, I'm getting rowdy;
time for the little guy to make a stand.
Putin? Darned tootin', he is an *ss hat,
but when I let loose, well, "Biden did that!"
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I'm driving the truck as little as possible these days, but $90 for half a tank of diesel is enough to bring out a bit of a rant...