Best Plumbing Poems

my spigot
is dripping

slide on an
O ring to

tighten 
the fixture...

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Inspired by Joseph Mays limerick contest.
(not for contest )
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A mischievous chef known as McMurray 
For a joke put Epsom salts in the curry
The toilet door...

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                      D
  ...

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The old house, built in 1895, was the best of weathered antiques having hugged North Rogers Street from days of horses to days of horse-powered...

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This country’s sure got problems
Corruption, crime, and drugs.
And though we try to fix the world
The world just hates our guts.
But for all our woes and...

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She asked him, "Why are you drinking
Before it's 9 am"?
He told her not to worry
She said, "Damn! You're drunk again".

She said that she was tired
Of...

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Our neighbour is plumbing Mum's drain
As some drips were causing her pain
But mum is no fool
And his "special" tool
Like Dad's, will just make yellow rain...

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My neighbour her name is Matilda
She used to step out with a builder
She loved the exotic, but became quite neurotic
When his lovemaking no longer thrilled...

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We live as kings and queens of yesterday could only dream
   Central heat, plumbing, air-conditioning, washers and dryers too
We shower once or twice...

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Spinning the Resort

By Elton Camp

For guests the resort does advertise
So it will be desirable in their eyes

Since the building is old and run down:
“Located in...

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Dear Sir or Madam

I’m not in the habit of talking to air
But just for the moment I’ll talk like you’re there
My mind isn’t closed to...

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In my man cave, is a closet
Which would spawn horrible critiques
Totes full of old computer parts
Some of which my be antiques

Various plumbing parts abound
But Lord...

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How I Got Richer and What I Did Next



I struck a sly deal with some Wall Street investors.
I shorted 'em stocks that didn't exist!
But they...

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Sun and traffic - day economy.
Six a.m. drive to plywood mill. Too tired
to be angry. Each day a step
toward death. What is being accomplished? The
small...

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It was a dark and moonless night. The lights were out. The TV low.
My hubby and I were relaxed, cuddled close, as the TV set...

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