Best Macho Poems
I’m a long-legged guy,
A macho man, if you will,
Tho still I fell for Little Blue Eyes,
When on the highway I was drawn
Into a Little Town church,
To give thanks for spared hurts
And wrecks when a truck driver drives.
There I met a tiny little girl that made my world,
As real as the road singing songs.
She made my ham and eggs,
And filled brown lunch bags with love--
And prayed.
The years went by and
When I was gone,
She studied and prayed and
Made us a home.
Now I’ve hung up the trucker’s gloves,
And hold her bare hands, giving my love
To the studies that made her a preacher.
She serves the Lord and I serve her,
Those blue eyes watch her man hear her sermons
For her tiny body holds a heart
Big enough for the both of us,
God and the mellowed macho man.
Macho Bee had a really big stinger.
Lady Bird, when aroused, was a singer.
When they heard her loud COO,
all the wood creatures knew
that first date must have been a humdinger!
For Line Gauthier's Bite Size Poem No.10 Poetry Contest
Nacho
Nacho Man
Nacho
Nacho Man
Baby you know that I am Nacho Man
Macho Man Sydrome
Women may have PMS,
But men have MMS
Macho Man Syndome
Not all men have this,
Plenty do and it makes life seem hard to exist
From Oil in Iraq
To Blood Diamond in Sierra Leone
Sooner or Later, Mother Earth will tell you
“Leave me the heck alone!”
Will you listen?
Of course not,
She'd have to glue your men together
Gray clouds with a dirty mist will make you surrender
When her eyes glaze at you
Maybe you'll realize there'll be no you
When it's through
Macho people have a reason to live
Laugh at the wimps
who have an opportunity to give
Men with their biceps
flexing heavy weight
Mocking the small
and their symbol that they hate
Goody two shoes
His eyes on the laptop
Mean Joe Green
wants that thing-am-a-jig to stop
Rolling up the sweaty sleeve
daring the nerd to make him leave
He does not respond
Mr.Machismo thinks he's won
It's the same ol tale
GOLIATH taunts DAVEY
Little guys are sissies
They're not wanted in the navy
In a world in which WE are only sloppy lasts
Is it the Bully or the Weenie
that gets the last laughs
Active macho sperm told the passive egg
I am turned on darling eggie are you on the rag?
Eggie smiled and tumbled
Sperm's bollocks are bumbled
Eve pinched Adam's bum, " your dizzy balls sag".
ADIOS MACHO IMAGE
It used to be-
How many times I’ve said those four words –
To put it bluntly a real man was hairy
If bald he grew a beard and moustache and
I mean a HUMDINGER!
Check out the old westerns
And hey! by the way Santa was macho
If a man be skin-clothed like an ape
Automatically he was tough!
Nowadays though
More and more the skin-head is in vogue
“The clean look”
Lean and mean?
Well not necessarily
The detestable wimp might fit the image
Though the wimp would probably just get a mocking
head-rub
Oh bring back those good old days
When the lady knew by kissing her man
what he had for lunch
When a skin-headed man usually covered it up
When the cigar smoke clung and slimed the moustache
You could smell a REAL man coming from half-a-block away
HIRSUTE MEN UNITE!
Down with the phallic image!
I'm lean, I'm mean, I'm tough as nails
Nothing could frighten me
I'm ready to defend my turf
as you can plainly see
Ju-Jitsu man, master of knife and sword,
Can shoot an eye out at a mile...
No fool would be so foolish
as to dare challenge me...
You see before he'd even know it,
I'd break his stupid knee
No Superman or Batman
Would dare to take on me
But, well, Mighty Mouse, that's another story,
Which leads us to our yarn..
But first let me emphasize
I am mighty, mighty macho
I'll never suffer hurt
I'm such a mighty he-man,
Even when I wear a skirt!
As Ive shown, I've always rules
My kingdom is my house
Until one winter's day
When I was attacked by a tiny mouse!
He scurried out from beneath the sink
and caught me by surprise,
That dastardly little bully!!
Just what did he thinK?
I saw bloodthirsty menace in his eyes..
I jumped up on the table
knew not if i should have fled
The frightful thought then came to me
What if now he's in my bed??
So I shored up my fading courage
Went to enroll in Mouse Martial Arts
I'll get that little bast_rd..
Before he terrifies more hearts
So when i graduated,
back to home I went
Helmet,armor, side-arms, baseball bat,
and mace and gas-mask too...
I knew I was now prepared,
For whatever he may do!
I searched the house that evening,
But find him i could not...
Now worried he went for friends...
that evil little snot!!
500 mose-traps I then set
Comforted, so off to bed I went
Woke up from a bad mouse-dream,
in the middle of the night,
To the bathroom i had to go
My bladder told me so,
Now if you can imagine
Being caught in 50 traps
Then you may envision
What was about to elapse...
Oww!Oww!Oww!, Oh, Mercy Me! is what I cried!
As mouse traps snapped right and left
My poor old bludgeoned feet!
Paid the price for my stupidity
And not being at all too deft!
I pee'd myself in pain,
It flowed from me like rain!
Luckily in spite of many a hurtful trap,
my pants I did not crap!
So let this be a lesson,
If a mouse wants to live with you,
Just choke down on your pride...
"Cause there's nothing you can do!!!
We are the Macho poets
We like football
We eat steak
Yes, we are the macho poets
We battle for better poetry
With a punch like Rocky Marciano
Yes, we are the Macho poets
We are the hard driving poets
We are the truck driving poets
We are the macho poets
Two hot "hat" contests on the soup
one for women and the other for men group,
just the name of the hats are original and funny
implying the two genders a-hem anatomy,
They both have axes to grind you can tell
they want you to rant and get mad as hell,
saying I'm from Venus while he's from Mars
while chasing each other to be feathered and tarred,
What they really both need is Aretha Franklin
singing out of respect for each sex over the din,
having them hold hands while she belts out her tune
R-E-S-P-E-C-T she will loudly croon,
Then they'll be huge hugs all around
both sexes hanging up their hats grooving to the sound,
Aretha being awarded for the Nobel Peace Prize
with no more I want to kill you looks in their eyes,
Just some poking fun from me
it doesn't matter if you disagree or agree,
what you'll vent about will be interesting
just hope it doesn't start WW3! :)
5-14-17
C hristopher, my name
H e is a strong man, they claim
R ugged, fearless, on my toes as always
I n the mighty palms of wits, my core lays
S urvival of the fittest and fit is Christopher!
T hen why does my heart often sob like a girl?
O h! I shouldn’t have said that! It’ll now spoil my image
P seudo-strong is my heart, trapped in a fragile cage
H elpless I feel when those emotions enclose me
E yes shed tears, speak the lingo of poetry
R egardless, Christopher is my name. I am strong, they claim!
You act arrogant,
Seeming belligerent,
Oh, how I feel for the macho man,
Looking to settle a score,
Lost at the core,
Soon he’ll hit the floor,
Oh, how I feel for the macho man,
Running by vengeance,
Lost all common sense,
Oh, how I feel for the macho man,
Strength comes within,
Not in the revenge you could get,
Soon you’ll feel karma hit,
Oh, how I feel for the macho man,
I’ve tried to give my help,
You said go to hell,
I can’t help you play,
With all the hearts you break,
Maybe that’s why there is all the hate,
For innocence sake,
Find reason,
Stop your love treason,
Stop your painful lesions,
Give life to what’s around you,
Not the feeling of what we already knew,
Oh, how I feel for you macho man.
I save my love in the cave
Where she roams free
Shoving aside the pride of the stave
Whose tentacles disagree
With the quality and quantity of care
Love demands in return for expanding horizons
In which she’s the key player whose flair
Dominates and dictates the zones
In which she receives affection in return
For the affection she bestows on me
To pour tons of affection into the urn
Where I’m forever indebted to see
Vast amounts of affection that nourish
Several critical aspects
Of emotional nutrients which burnish
The love I save from suspects
Too keen to take to flight
At the earliest demand love makes to protect her sanctity
In the face of the slight and plight
She lands sometimes when the care quantity
She gains proves too little
To justify sacrifices love makes to comfort
Me despite the brittle
Vase I inadvertently crush in the fort
Where love hides the heart so often misunderstood
In contexts so complex
Brave love feels it’s high time she vacated the neighbourhood
Where partners find reasons their macho muscles to flex.
In the beginning….a long time ago…man discovered aggression.
He lived and survived
then with passing of time
existence was no longer dependent on a combative mind.
But he continued to see power in his macho ways.
Aggression perverted….resulting in malaise.
Barbaric lessons learned
Bullies created….and superiority desires yearned.
And hatred pervaded….and took deep root.
And before its appearance
in the alleys and streets
sprouted in the mind….grew in the heart….and now it repeats.
Violence does not come in only one form.
Real peace and tranquility will never ensue….until they become the norm.
For an onslaught has emerged once more….and if we ignore
Circumstances will ignite….a deplorable war.
And if malevolence continues to rise and advance
Care….love….compassion….does not stand a chance.
So who is to blame?…. Is it you…or is it the other?
This hostility against….sister and brother.
Change is possible in the hearts of men
but perceived strength needs to be reformed….and the questions are how and when?
Leadership….support….protection….should be the true qualities of man.
Now is the time to give birth….to a caring humanity plan.
In the beginning….a long time ago….man discovered aggression
lived and survived.
And now during this moment in time
blissful existence impossible….without a peaceful, noncombative mind.
He catches evildoers in his sturdy claws
That's what they get for breaking all those laws
Crime fighting crustacean without a pause
Binding crooks with pincers is such a worthy cause
He lives in a giant seashell in the briny deep
Then bursts upon the scene wherever evil creeps
When a robbery's in progress,he is there with a leap
Bringing villains to justice, so we can safely sleep