Best Gee Poems

There’s a party tonight so I bouffe up my hair
Pamper and powder my sweet derrière,
Arrive at the door, all done up to impress.....
Oh man, I...

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Wonder not
if my thoughts are thrilled and twisted
daily and deeply by the albums of your ways,
I succumb severely to the impulse of imminent interplay
so dumb...

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My glucose is too high
My salt test says it could kill me
My weight is over the limit by a pound
My X-ray is dark and dim

But,...

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Hotwired the orgasmatron
headed out on sixty-nine
know there’s nothin up ahead
and even less behind.
Pagination, pixilation
nothing seems to work
maybe just  I’m gettin old
maybe just a jerk
off...

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A Troll in My Trunk
(Inspired by the YouTube video ‘A Monkey in your Trunk’)


Ok! Some crazy person made a YouTube video, about a monkey in...

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"Backhand"



You have turned me
inside out, cut open
like a tennis ball
I used to beat backhand
along with the racket
hard against the garage wall

To make sense of it...

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My New Years resolution is not to make any more New Years resolutions!
I've made 'em in the past but they died on the craggy shoals...

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Hey! Get lost wasp you are a pesky swine
This cherry ice cream is mine ALL mine

You buzz around and make my life hell
Look - this...

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In years gone by, folks didn’t like to say
God’s name to show  surprise or great dismay,
and so you would hear “Goodness,“ “Gol” and “Gee,“
and...

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Jack the Quatrain King a possible moniker 
When it comes to quatrains, he’s an astonisher
With humor and wit he deliver’s his world view
Unfortunately now, he’s...

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“And how are you named dear Owl?” The Owl continued to look dignified but uttered no reply, rather it fixed Dumpty with a thoughtful look...

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I learnt a lesson well today on how good hygiene works,
and how sometimes it doesn’t pay, to gain professional perks.
It was Mick the barber’s little...

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The unsung heroes of the open plains
The outlaw bandits like Jesse James 

Cut throat thieves and black jack hustlers 
Green horn Cowboys and long horn...

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Darling—Would you dance this last dance with me?
I thought of this question so intently as I gazed at
You afar tonight across the busy dance floor...

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Topics of conversation seem to change as we approach maturity.
As kids we talked of love - now it's lumbago and social security!
It once was enlightening...

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