Best Cereal Poems
Cereal Killer
The story of his life
a made for TV thriller.
Title in blood red
life of a cereal killer.
He don’t want no fried eggs
or peanut butter toast.
He killed a box of grape nuts once
but he don’t like to boast.
He has Wheaties for his breakfast
Cheerios for his lunch.
For a mid day snack
he likes Captain Crunch.
He don’t want a T-bone
he don’t want French silk.
Corn flakes and some sugar
in a great big bowl of milk.
Along about suppertime
as he hides from the cops.
Sitting in the shadows
munching sugar pops.
He don’t mean to scare you
sometimes he behaves.
Even when it’s boo berry
or Count Chocula he craves.
He’s no threat to society
at a table or a booth.
He’s just a cereal killer
with a really bad sweet tooth.
From early dawn til after dusk
he’s never gonna stop.
You hear him in his kitchen
going snap crackle and pop!
Edwin C Hofert
**REAL CEREAL TRIX**
This girl Rio's, packed lunch in a cereal bowl
Her language almost sounds like espanol
Adding chocolate chunks to her munch
Funny how she ate, cinnamon toast crunch
The real TRIX is to add corn, in anything, NIKKO!
hahha kidding!
dedicated to RIO~aka NIKKO
Waking up for school was hard enough,
still half asleep not ready for the bus,
breakfast on the dot,
snap, crackle and pop,
noisy Rice Krispy's helping us wake up.
12-5-16
Sworn to secrecy, she told me it had been a long time..
as we sat swinging in a hammock in the late day sun.
'What., are you sayin' you never did it?'
I thought what my mom would do if she caught me, and replied
'brought up different I guess'.
She leaned back into the netting, perhaps chewing on what I said..
half her face streaked in sunlight.
Suddenly aware of her leg touching mine. So warm...
My cotton red racing striped trunks from Sears, with a secret webbed key pocket..her faded OshKosh B'Gosh bibs she wore all summer except on Sundays.
(Sundays were saved for wearing that white & pink pleated Victorian get up she so detested; a gift from her Grandma bought from Macy's mail order catalog)
She ribbed me with her right elbow, as she jumped clear of our swing..
when her mom yelled 'time for supper Kat!' from the front porch.
But she turned back with that dangerous look I'd learned, leaned in close, and licked across all her teeth.
'Milk's colder and better ya know..
drunk straight from the carton.'
She ran inside letting the screen door go with a full slam..!
I thought about all the times we watched Jonny Quest at her house,
eatin' our Quisp or Kaboom with that milk..., and smiled.
I kept Kat's secret safe..,'til just now anyway.
dialogue
Crispy leaves sipping Autumn's pour
car roofs collect and bathe in snow
milk and cereal for breakfast.
For Carol Brown's 'Whats the buzz' contest
The the real maniacs to dread
Are ones you don't think will kill you
Not the murderers in the news you once read
In the morning think about who's in view
Why do you fear a man like john Wayne Gacy
He's locked away and cannot harm you
A guy who should really make you worry
Is the kid who always Liked it, Little Mikey
Don't think that you may get eaten by Jeffery Dahmer
There is no need to worry
You need to think about getting eaten by Tony the Tiger
Don't think he won't hurt you just because he's furry
Don't get scared by the BTK Killer
While eating breakfast there's an animal that you see
He may laugh but be afraid of Woody Woodpecker
He has a sharp beak and is as dangerous as can be
You shouldn't waste your time being scared of Ted Bundy
Just another with no one left to scare
When eating his charms there's a killer leprechaun who feels lucky
It's him that you really need to fear
The last is don't think about Charles Manson
He may be the worst
But in the morning when you hear a crunch be aware of the Cap'n
Of the dangerous morning mascots he ranks first
She ain't nothing but a cereal killer
She's murder with a gallon of milk
If you need convincing, Cap'n Crunch is still missing
And that Chocula guy is down for the Count
She ain't nothing but a cereal killer
Gets her Kix pulling off her Trix
As she bids them Cheerio being more in the know
Than a bowl of FrankenBerry buried below Honey Oh's
She ain't nothing but a cereal killer
Winning them over with her Lucky Charms
No way to deny she eats them alive
As she Frosts Tony the Tiger like Corn
She ain't nothing but a cereal killer
Finds pleasure in the Shredding of Wheat
Using Fruity Pebbles to go along with her evil
As she spoons out her dirty deeds
She ain't nothing but a cereal killer
Easily making history out of Rice Krispy treats
What ever you do keep an eye on her Fruit Loops
That kind of crazy nobody needs
When I was single and living alone
Cereal curbed my tummy’s moans
Eating Cap'n Crunch
Breakfast, dinner, and lunch
Was a cooking hookey I honed!
10/4/11
Received 2nd place in "Cereal Limerick" contest
Cereal Kid-napper…
One who randomly texts’ you
Do you want to be kidnapped today,
And apologizes when running late.
You are picked up willing and able-
No duct tape or zip ties are needed.
Instead she brings…
Banana bread or cookies
And sometimes cake.
The kids are stuck in back—
Saying Hello—Auntie Merri…
Even before I can open the door,
It is the greatest thing.
Buckled up---off we go—running errands,
Forgetting our coupons—losing the keys—(not me).
Somehow we manage to get things done,
Even though we do not know the day of the week.
Someone is hungry—(not the kids).
If we be good--She may get us a treat,
When our errands are done.
Then you are returned, safely back home,
With a tentative date of the next time
You will be kidnapped by your favorite niece.
Copyright © Merri-Merri/fonda anne….
cereal box prize
now what do i do with it
play catch with the air....
Have you tried the Kix
much, much, better than Trix
When it hits milk, smoother than Silk
You'll know where I get my fix
-Robert Dixon
Want to lose weight the natural way,
keeping the sweet cereal at bay,
tastes rather bland,
but looser waist band,
thats why I'm eating little bales of hay.
12-17-16
Just stepped on a mini wheat, now I'm known as a cereal killer
Ate some fruit loops, now I'm a star in a fruity loopy thriller
Devoured some cheerios
Now have a happy ego
Coco Puffs make me loco, puff up and stick up my bad finger!
Cold cereal, hot morning
That damn alarm again,
I roll out of bed
not wanting to wake you
it was a late night,
you need the rest
I shower and get
dressed for work,
then make my way
through the dark
into the kitchen
As quietly as I can
I pour the flakes
into a bowl,
add milk and sugar,
yep, breakfast
I turn and I am startled,
you are standing there smiling at me,
then you kiss me with such passion
it would burn my toast,
had I been making some
Then you whisper in my ear
so soft and sensual,
“Couldn’t you be a little late today?”
I smile and follow you back to bed
I didn’t want cereal anyway….
Good morning Soupers
Cereal and milk
goes down like silk,
Makes you smile
and feel good for a while.
Feed it to me
and I'll feed it to you.
I'll even eat it
out of a shoe!
By: Carole O'Terry Duet
Copyright: 2002
"All Rights Reserved"