Ongoing woes and Heartfelt Gratitude - Trudy Diane Rider's Blog

<P><FONT color=#800080 size=4><EM><STRONG>My Dearest Soupers, Poets, and Friends,</STRONG></EM></FONT></P> <P><STRONG><EM><FONT color=#800080 size=4>I want to thank you all for your comments, soupmails, and overall genuine concern for my well being. It just reinforces my love for each and everyone of you out there in my Poetry soup family...</FONT></EM></STRONG></P> <P><STRONG><EM><FONT color=#800080 size=4>Things have been rough here for a while, and as you all may or may not know, my husband has a rare and uncurable lung disease that he was diagnosed with 2 years ago when he quit his "using"... It's been a long, hard two years of going to Doctors al over the state and hospital stays and close brushes with the unknown.</FONT></EM></STRONG></P> <P><STRONG><EM><FONT color=#800080 size=4>Also, we have been living in this house here for 4 years now, and the City has been trying to buy the land from our landlord to make a city park out of the property. The landlord has always told us that as long as he has renters in the house, he will not sell. Recently the City sweetened the offer and he's not sure now how long he can hold out, so we may have to start looking for a place to live that will have a yard big enough,and ALLOW us to have 2 big dogs, 3 cats and 3 birds. In this economy and housing crunch we'd be lucky to save the money for the first &amp; last months rent much less even FIND a house that will allow us to have our "family".</FONT></EM></STRONG></P> <P><STRONG><EM><FONT color=#800080 size=4>Recently my husband's condition progressed to stage 4 of the disease and with all the stress from the City, and the landlord, the doctors, and work, not having a real vacation in over 5 years, etc etc etc, something in my mind snapped. A customer at work asked me how I was doing, I replied I was fine, then started crying. I didn't stop crying for 3 days. My husband was so worried, (cause that just isn't what I do) that he had me admitted to the mental hospital for 72 hours. That is where the last few poems were written, and that is why I haven't been posting or replying to all the wonderful comments you all have taken the time to write to me.&nbsp; </FONT></EM></STRONG></P> <P><STRONG><EM><FONT color=#800080 size=4>I want you all to know that I am not ignoring you, I just have been too fragile to do much of anything but heal my psyche. (which I am well on the way to doing, thanks to all of you, my wonderful family and the wonders of modern medicine!) LOL I have&nbsp;begun (or I should say re-started) my daily meditaions with the Great Spirit and trying to reconnect with Mother Earth, (hence the poem about the bonnie heather) ::grin::</FONT></EM></STRONG></P> <P><STRONG><EM><FONT color=#800080 size=4>I want to thank you all for standing behind me and not abandoning me when I needed you most. You all mean the world to me and my heart bursts with gladness when I come here to be with you all.&nbsp; Thank you all so much and forgive me if I have seemed distant, or uninterested, or if I have been remiss in my replys to your beautiful comments. Know that you have all been here in my heart and held dear in my recovery process for poetry is my heart and soul and I could not live without it or any of you!</FONT></EM></STRONG></P> <P><STRONG><EM><FONT color=#800080 size=4>With Love Forever,</FONT></EM></STRONG></P> <P><STRONG><EM><FONT color=#800080 size=4>Tru</FONT></EM></STRONG></P>

Karla Null Date: 10/3/2009 6:54:00 PM Your three days of crying was just a way to cleanse yourself of all the stress. I sincerely hope that you bounce back with vigor...Luv..Karla Login to Reply

Tim Ryerson Date: 9/30/2009 5:38:00 PM To you, Trudy..."What does not kill me, makes me stronger" (Friedrich Nietzsche) Love and humble prayers for you and your husband - Tim Login to Reply

Janette Fisher Date: 9/29/2009 10:00:00 AM Trudy, my thoughts are with you and your husband as you go through this tough time. I understand fully what you are going through as my husband has been battling incurable but controlable cancer for the past three years. Sometimes you are strong and other times you want to scream and run away. On the outside you appear together whilst inside, you are a crumbling wall. If not for my friends and family supporting me I would have cracked up ages ago. Take strength from those around you and I'm sure you will regain your psyche. Love Janette Login to Reply

Constance La France Date: 9/29/2009 8:30:00 AM Trudy, I am so sorry to read about all your hardships. It is no wonder you "cracked" under the pressure and worry of it all, it is difficult to be strong when your world is crashing in around you. You are right to find peace with your faith... I am thinking of you and hoping things improve in you life.. keep writing, thats an excellent form of release for your feelings... Spirit and Soul, Constance Login to Reply

Carrie Richards Date: 9/29/2009 7:55:00 AM Thoughts and prayers as you go through this difficult time, Trudy. Hang on to knowing you have friends who care and wish you well. Love, Carrie Login to Reply

Carolyn Devonshire Date: 9/29/2009 7:37:00 AM Trudy, you are a beloved member of the Soup Family and we shall continue to pray for you and your husband. You truly do bring light and joy to many here; would that we could do more to aid you during this troubling time. God bless you and please keep us posted. Love you! Carolyn Login to Reply

Carol Sunshine Brown Date: 9/29/2009 4:11:00 AM Trudy, my prayers are still with you both. Take your time and heal my friend. I know you have a lot to go through. I just didn't realize how big your bump in the road was hon. Keep your faith dear and know we are always here for you. Love and blessings to you and yours always, Carol Login to Reply

Olajide Adelana Date: 9/28/2009 8:03:00 PM More grease to your elbow Login to Reply

Charmaine Chircop Date: 9/28/2009 6:32:00 PM Dear Trudy you and your husband are in my prayers,never knew what you were passing through dear,my heartfelt thoughts with you and im sure in the end all ends well,just beleive in yourself as you always did and all will be ok,,i promise--LoveCharma Login to Reply