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Serenity's Last Serenade

*A small lake named Serenity am I,
well hidden here among the fragrant pines;
reflecting the **cerulean of sky
till Sun behind the distant peak reclines.

***Now humming bugs crepuscular emerge
to greet the twilight’s creeping.  Next a fawn
has soundlessly appeared upon my verge.
A lapping in the stillness. . . then she’s gone.

*Dawn arrives.  I’m longing to be painted
**once again by sun, the color azure.
Jubilant that I remain untainted, 
***I croon to nature, rippling my rapture.

New creatures on two legs disrupt my peace!
Who comes here? Must my serenade now cease?

(For the Designed by Devise Poetry Contest of Debbie Guzzi)
* Stanza one: Personification & metaphor of the lake
**Alliteration of S in line one
The alliteration continues with the words small/serenity/cerulean/sky/Sun/diStant
*** Stanza two:  Assonance of the sound U as in “cup” with humming and bugs
Also the assonance of the ee sound in greet/creeping/soundlessLY/appeared/shE’s
*  In Stanza three: Dawn is added to the personification. The lake continues to be
Personified in the entire stanza. 
**Also there is Assonance throughout with the U sound
again: Once/ sUn/ cOlor/ jubilAnt as well as the long A sound of line 3’s remain & untainted plus line 4’s nAture.  
***Alliteration of R/P sounds line 4:croon/rippling/rapture.


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  1. Date: 10/1/2014 2:52:00 PM

    this is very beautifully painted andrea excellent pen
  1. Date: 10/1/2014 12:00:00 PM

    I can almost hear the waves crashing against the shore, feel the wind blowing on the top of the water. I hope your serenity is never interupted my friend. For this is a very lovly discriptive write, cheri
  1. Date: 10/1/2014 1:30:00 AM

    Nice poem Andrea. but my head is going round in circles as i try to keep my attention on the instruction PHEW. Enjoyed youe poem, my friend..... I hate that when you're sitting quietly listening to the sounds of nature, the all the fools come on making their trivial human noises....peter
  1. Date: 10/1/2014 12:18:00 AM

    This was a difficult contest - at least it would have been for me. You've made it seem easy. All my best for your winning. God bless you and love and prayers, Gina
  1. Date: 9/30/2014 8:55:00 PM

    I wish I was this clever and knew how to do this.Good luck with Your entry because this is a wonderful piece.I just favorite You because I love Your writings...God Bless Friend,Hugs.Love Char
  1. Date: 9/30/2014 7:46:00 PM

    Those pesky humans seem to get in the way of everything! Well constructed poem - good luck in the contest! Peace & Love Matthew Anish
  1. Date: 9/30/2014 7:33:00 PM

    I am not touching that contest with a ten foot pole. I would try it but I don't want to break my brain. Excellent write, I have seen other entries so the asterisks were easy enough to ignore. I think Debbie is going to love this one. I wonder how many wins she is awarding.
  1. Date: 9/30/2014 6:43:00 PM

    I was wondering what all the * were for! haha after reading it again and ignoring the dots, it was beautiful, well done! ! It is sure to be a winner girl, as always you rock ;)
  1. Date: 9/30/2014 11:35:00 AM

    Great sonnet - so descriptive. Again, a wonderful poems from you. And again, I hate to be a pest, but what was the name of your poem about that dying cat?
  1. Date: 9/30/2014 11:19:00 AM

    Amazing imagery Andrea you painted a brilliant picture. Good luck in the contest - you included everything Debbie asked for ... and more! :-) hugs jan xxx