Funny Train Poems | Examples
These Funny Train poems are examples of Train poems about Funny. These are the best examples of Train Funny poems written by international poets.
Santa Claus hired a dragon, Donnie Draco
to bring shy elves out of their cocoons;
he trains them to deliver the presents,
as meeting humans for them, is not pleasant.
Humans are huge and tower over elves,
and they would prefer just to sit on shelves.
Donnie's courage lends them strength;
don't worry, he keeps them at arm's length.
Donnie takes them around to stores,
to meet children, by the scores.
Sometimes a push or urging one needs,
to help a shy elf to proceed.
The kids just love to see old Donnie;
Santa thinks a Christmas Dragon's funny.
Well, really, truly yes, it is;
it lends a dimension to this seasonal biz.
And when these little elves are broken in,
Donnie goes home to visit with his kin;
high in the mountains of the North Pole,
in a cave called, "The Old Dragon Hole".
So if at Christmas, in a store you see,
a dragon the size of a Christmas tree
and tiny, shy elves that he is training,
do try not to end up fainting.
For Donnie's kind is a peaceful lot,
really though, if you think not,
just look inside yourself and see,
that deep with us all, a dragon be.
Honor me with your company at tea
Outdoors where the air is always free
A table awaits us on the railroad tracks
Have a seat facing me my good old friend
The 10:00 am bullet train is coming fast
It should arrive on time this time
Would you like some jam with crackers?
Don’t worry. Don’t look behind you
That sound you hear is your imagination
Thunder is normal this time of year
If you feel a draft just close your eyes
It will pass through you once upon a time
Impacts are funny like that
It is after ten. I fear a crash is near
Drink up while you can my friend
I’m sorry. Did I say crash?
Crackers is what I meant to say
Good day
A sudden rain
cloaked the rail path
Lightning strikes were furious
Thunder storms drum big
Windows drenched in rain
Unable to see the scenes
Uncertain about the future
As we were trapped inside
Dreading the journey,
Holding my dad's fingers
I closed my eyes;
Leaning on his arms
Lamenting the harms
Frightened me, cried
To wipe out my tears,
he made me hear
his childhood memories
and funny stories
To obliterate my fear,
he enunciated his, failed cracks
and success tracks
"Beleive in the driver
and relish the journey"
He boldly advised
By sharing his life's journey
He made that messy journey
The memorable one
The stories I heard on that ride
could be correlated with all the current
and future circumstances
The lesson I assimilated
Is my guiding light
Even after the halt of the train
The words he uttered
resonated deeply inside
and still resonating
even after his demise
and will keep on resonating
throughout my life
Happy Father's day
A man tried to hop on the caboose
But his pants came a loose
He felt to the ground
Made a very loud sound
He looked like a sick mother goose
My heart's out on the train track
and the train is on it's way
When I think the whistle's blowing
and the breeze has lied to me
And I go about my business
knowing love is on the way
When the train must run me over
For the love to fell away
When its only time to tell me
That the train was running late
As it's only scheduled to me
when my moves were not that great
And my love could only fail
for my life to end this way
As it's only make-believe
that my love has come today
In a train that keeps on chugging
for an engine in dismay
Where I loved her for another
down the track past where I lay
I tried to listen to her complaining
But I was too far from time remaining
Soon the train would be waiting
With time would be debating
Upon a cork that should be campaigning
November 22, 2019
Five Word Challenge Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Beth Evans
The train chugged along the track
The ducks all said quack quack quack
The cows said Moo
And birds flew
Over the fastest train in the world
The ducks were swimming in the pond
The cows were standing in a field
The birds flew overhead
And they all said, said, said
Quack! Moo!
Moo! Quack!
See that train speeding on the track
The train track
Where's the train?
It passed by so fast
We heard a whistle and a blast
The cows mood, the ducks quacked
They all saw the fastest train pass on the track!
SUSAN RODE THE TROLLEY TO THE TRAIN TO HOUSTON
TO BUY A SPECIAL DOLLY
Oh! gee ooh-wee golly, golly;
Rode the tracks of the long trolley;
Little girl named Susan;
Rode the train to Houston;
To toy store purchased a dolly;
6/19/18
written by James Edward Lee Sr.©2018
I stand on a train to Albany
Whistling a tune out of key
I get many looks
Thrown are many books
As I am trying to sing while I pee
Russell Sivey
You
In the middle
Of a one track mind
You
For whom
This train is waiting
Me
So corny
My ears are sprouting silk
Standing all alone,
at the edge of time.
With no where left to fall,
and no where else to climb.
I feel like I'm standing
back at the end of the line.
Of that soul collecting train
that I missed the very first time.
It don't matter much to me you see,
I'm just going to stand right here and wait.
For that golden train to pull in,
that's taken me to the pearly gates.
When that train pulls out
your going to hear me yell.
As I'm leaving this here place
that is now a man made hell.
Where all the politics and corruption,
of this once great and mighty place.
Turned into need and greed
that just fills me with disgrace.
Now I am far from perfect,
God knows that is true.
But, I'm praying for forgiveness,
and I suggest, that you do too.
So when that train pulls in
to take us from this man made hell.
Grab the seat right next to me
and we can both then yell!
YEEEEEEEEE HAAAAAAA!!!
Dan Kearley: 3-24-16
The train was packed; I had a seat.
I read my magazine.
The car was fairly quiet,
Though you’d never say serene.
Still, I was in the middle of
A story quite engrossing,
When someone with the biggest mouth
Began with his verbosing.
He made up songs with lyrics lame
And he was so annoying
That every sentence that I read
Turned bothersome and cloying.
I couldn’t tune him out and then
Of course, he asked for money,
Apologizing to the folks
Who didn’t find him funny.
I wish someone had shut him up
But on and on he yapped.
He had the perfect audience –
For all of us were trapped.
Kicked out of a theater for the twenty-sixth time,
the owner suggested to the highest building in town they should climb.
From there, throw yourselves down to the street.
Their act was considered both putrid and effete.
It was discovered three beautiful women also came.
Hilda, Wilda, and Tilda they were called by name.
These girls didn’t seem to have anything to hide.
In a similar situation, they contemplated suicide.
As all six of them were ready to go,
there was somebody mysteriously playing a piano.
The man playing the instrument was a millionaire.
He often played in isolation in the open rooftop air.
The man thought this sextet had talent that was not bad.
He hired all of them to star in a musical that he had.
However, the stooges and female company once again tasted defeat.
The man was insane and bound for Dr. Dippy’s Retreat.
Based on the Columbia Pictures short subject “Rhythm and Weep” starring the Three Stooges.
Five little ants, chugging along
Alternatively, perhaps it was six, hard to tell
I saw no engine nor did I see a caboose
Saw no little smoke stack belching smoke
Nor did I hear a whistle blow
However, these little fellows were sure determined
To get where they were going
Or perhaps they were returning from where they had been.
They let nothing stand in their way
No obstacle blocked their travels
However, every so often they seemed to stop
As if to make sure they were headed the right way
I wish I knew where they were headed
For perhaps I would follow them
And find a pleasant place to end my journey.
I could well imagine the conversations
Being conversed along their way
Perhaps they were as interested in me
As I was in them, but I think not
For they continued on their way
As I watched them slowly move along
On their journey to someplace.
No time for roses
I know how they smell,
I'm looking at four walls
tango with hell.
I ride trains,all over town.
Rooftops and hightops
and twisted caps are funny,
I see some women dressed
to be Playboy bunnies.
I ride trains,all over town
I ride trains going uptown
and downtown north and south,
I listen to people screaming for help.
train rolling
train rolling
train rolling
moving hard and fast
I'm riding til it stops
or when it runs out of gas.