Short Trainer Poems

they come and some
white black
well lady stack
and brown and round
with suntainer
long belt in hands
tech them to stand
DOG TRAINER...

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Amazing creature,
Tiny weight trainer, never
Doubts his own power.
He’s a tiny master of
A great, herculean task.

...

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There’s a cat trainer named, Jack Jicks
Who teaches kitty cats, cat tricks
To pull off this feat
He gives them small sweets
And calls his plan, Tic Tac, tactics...

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Sue got wedged on the exercise bike
And she doesn’t look so lady like
With both legs akimbo
She looked like a bimbo
Told the trainer to go take a hike!




20th July 2015...

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Trump Chomped To Bits

Trump has become a toilet trainer traitor;
Should send to China on a slow freighter;
Obce was a boat
With an anecdote;
Can you believe he was a woman hater.

Jim Horn...

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Help From Above!


there once was a Man from Rangoon
who gorged 'till he he resembled a balloon
between bites he did spy
his personal trainer from the sky
with results-  made the ladies swoon!...

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Day one I showed up

ready to start working at

Der Wienerschnitzel.

My first day was my last day.

The trainer was a *wiener!


*slang for a jerk
(True story from my youth
for Linda's Day One Poetry Contest)...

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An inspiring lady named Dayna,

        Is an incredible stunt trainer!

           a true wonder woman too
        
          Beloved of cast and crew!

         Nothing is too difficult to strain her



   21-8-2018...

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An amazing lady called Dayna,
       Is an incredible stunt trainer.
        Truly Wonder Woman too,
        She can triple flip on cue
       I need to put her on retainer!



20-8-2018
(currently stunt double on Wonder Woman 2 )...

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Someone over 200 pounds, start at the lowest setting
On an Elliptical Trainer can burn 400 calories, that's bed wetting!
Says the brochure
Gonna buy one for sure
Soon be a trim senior if my ticker doesn't start objecting...

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I want a horse
Affordable
Never grows old
Never goes lame
I can ride him anytime I want
When I'm unavailable
I have the most understanding trainer to take care of him
His bills are all paid
And he's mine all mine
If dreams were horses...

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My trainer said just one more

Now I'm stretched out on the floor

Helpless here flat on my back

Waiting for that heart attack

Someone dial 911

Now the end has just begun

I'm feeling weak as a pup

I don't think I'm getting up...

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Once lived an old woman from Kalamazoo
She had been an animal trainer at the zoo
A tiger bit off her thumb,
She admitted it was dumb
But, with her left thumb gone, what else could she do?

written January 25, 2022...

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Someone  over 200 pounds, for 30 minutes at the lowest setting
On an Elliptical Trainer can burn 400+ calories, that's bed wetting!
Says the brochure
Gonna buy one for sure
Soon be a slim trim senior, if my ticker doesn't start objecting...

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Yellowstone's best is known as Rip
A wild one with a steel hand grip
A cowboy rancher's dream
He makes trespassers scream
A horse trainer so well equipped

5/4/22
Contest: High Noon Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Joseph May

( howmanysyllables.com - 88668 syllable counts)...

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I gaze into my sons' lives
  and see myself
One's a fitness trainer
  So was I at his stage
One's a finance man
  Ditto for me at 24
One's a soldier
  Now that's what I
  secretly yearned to be
My youngest son 
  is the 'real me' ~
  tho' he's no forever
    wannabe...

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Teachers foregather,
To learn forthcoming battle,
But fuming the day.

Down their heads  in books, 
With unreadable feelings,
Tea brings high spirits.

Checked their performance
was trainer of all of them,
Showed fury at them.

To fondle them lot,
Try to be amiable,
But of no avail....

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There once was a lion so dread
His trainer must keep him well fed
For if this bad lion
Got hungry for Brian
Old Brian might just end up dead!

Ole Leo the lion acclaimed
Like to play the “I’m so sweet” game
Slow Brian was lulled
And his arm it was culled
Now, the zoo’s out a lion it seems!...

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Sitting waiting patient,
for what I am to be.

Butterflies are spinning
from what I cannot see.

Wating for a trainer
to teach me what to do.

Looking, thinking, talking
while my life is all askew.

Watching for the rainbow
to find the pot of gold.

Hoping that I find it
before I grow too old....

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HAIKU #12,049-12,052


When I write haiku
My mind in spa called Iris
And I am in charge

My body seem poised
Like personal trainer firm
As muscles of mine

Reward is in thoughts
I'll own like a work of art
Bidding me to bid

I want to be toned
By fresh colorful visions
With vocab of worth.

*...

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sappy valentine
brown-eyed largesse broke my heart
a little, too much—
godspeed ahead…my sailor
celebrates the day we met

February 2022

David and I met 42 years ago on Valentine’s Day
in Navy “A” school. He brought me to see the
submarine trainer - awooga awooga (or gaga for short ;)...

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through the tall grass
silently
we track
I am watching the trainer
dont lift your head
I think
watching your back
serious tail wagging
this is a job to be done

but you already know
you're a great tracker
and the best dog 
in this world
so far

head in the weeds
nose to the dirt
steady steps
yes
he's got it....

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A lesson plan now
A micro teaching,how?
A mental block, sure
Experiential learning pure

Trainèr turned student
Who will be more prudent
The pressure is real
Will I over deliver, I feel

My spirit soars with wisdom afresh
Born to unravel the learning mesh
Applying the scientific method now
Pushed to the limit by the cash cow...

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Electricity charged the air
 Sounds of thunder rolled
 Silence of the night dispelled
 The storm takes sleep's toll

 Hairy tried to bark the thunder
 Away, sleep only left
 After a sleepless night
 My brain seems very deft

 A dog trainer he needs or maybe
 A disciplinarian
 Love has not fixed his problems
 He's quite the barbarian...

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Personal trainer pasttime profession
Oscilalliting 
Explosion of love and life
And massive mechanistic strain
of Money and management

What comes
Of this personal pride?
Stubborn bootcamp bellows
My soul in arears 
Transmitting the dance and exchange

Who needs
The service of muscle and nerves
My urgent truncating peace
Chomping this temporary meet and greet...

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