Short Smarty Poems

Footle.......
......... little

smaller......
.....graceful

tiny..........
......smarty...

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Trump poses as a staunch smarty
Disciple of Moriarty
With raunch he'll enthrall
And soon abuse all
Launching his psychopath party...

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once a char maid Cinderella
had hard time finding a fella
	she crashed a party
	thought herself smarty 
outplayed Anastasia and Drizella...

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Happy Marty loved to party;
Every day, he was a smarty.
One day Marty told a joke;
Offended party friends and folk;
Now Marty’s so down hearty!
...

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Time for a new maritime party
Leadership bold, yet seasoned and hearty --
   Took a long time to pick it
   But we've got us the ticket --
"Tip-a-canoe" and "Right-the-Ship-Smarty"...

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Purple raccoon decided to plan a surprise party.
He asked me for my advice, all hale and hearty.
Then I discovered it was for me, he is no smarty.
Is it a surprise? I asked. He nodded. A surprise party....

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Wife Linda and I created a genius it's seeming
Am I proud of son Scottie, you betcha I'm beaming 
My VP smarty pants
Does the corporate dance
Heading for president, hallelujah I'm screaming...

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Methinks I'm pretty swift, at least one day outta two
That's a 50% smarty pants, not bad how's about youse
Are ya over or under
That magical number
A geezer like me, we gots no time to lose!!!...

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Methinks I'm pretty swift, at least one day outta two
That's a 50% smarty pants, not bad how's about youse
Are ya over or under
That magical number
A geezer like me, we gots no time to lose!!!...

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Just paid a visit to my 92 year old bother-in-law
Tells me he's still playing golf, now that's the last straw
Surely one-of-a-kind
Mind boggling I find
Won't tell me his secret, Mr. Smarty Pants... pshaw!...

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EVENT PLANNER:
Party
Smarty

AWARDS BANQUET:
Winner
Dinner

STUCK-UP SUPERMODEL:
Snotty
Hotty

CHEERFUL DAD:
Happy
Pappy

TODDLER WITH A SNACK:
Munchin'
Munchkin

HYPERACTIVE CHIMP:
Spunky
Monkey

A SWEET TREAT:
Tummy 
Yummy


1/21/2013...

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Once was a smarty-pants now they're down at my ankles
My thoughts are all scattered, my brain's all tangled
What can I do to fix my mojo
Chat with my loving friend Mo-Mo
That'll fix it as well as untangle my wee spaniel...

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Look down at your belly button, is it an in-y or an out-y
In-y's denote intelligence so exhibit it quite proudly
While at the beach
It won't be your physique
They'll know you're a smarty and they'll cheer you quite loudly...

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When you think of Aussieland, what's the last thing you think of
Did you say SNOW, to the head of the class, you smarty pants scruff
It's not the image
We see in the filmage
Nevertheless up in the mountains is no place for ducks...

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I just went to my work's Christmas party 
I got drunk on some rum with Bacardi 
Told my boss, to go get lost 
Said, "I'm the boss, Applesauce" 
Then, she fired me for being a smarty 


Christmas Limerick 
Sponsor: Andrea Dietrich 
12/15/2021...

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    ‘smarty-pants’
       too big for his britches

    kept his audience
       in virtual stitches

    on the road from rags to riches
       ran into some unforeseen glitches

    courtesy of parents' old-fashioned switches
       'smarty-pants’ derriere throbs and twitches
...

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Look down at your belly button, is it an In-Y or an Out-Y
In-Y's denote intelligence so exhibit it quite proudly
While at the beach
It won't be your physique
They'll know you're a smarty and they'll cheer you quite loudly


© Jack Ellison 2015



Mine is an In-Y of course!...

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No you cannot have your way
Because this is my party.
I am the king of the day.
Yes, girls can be king, Smarty.
You can stay and eat and play.
Birthday cake, scarf it hearty.
Can you live? I must say nay.
I am king and you are swarthy.
Let her eat then take her away.
I am king, and it’s my day!...

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It's true doggies can tell time
Our guys are on a tight eating schedule
8:00 in the morning and 8:00 at night
But it seems they can tell time
They start growling and woofing at 7:30
As if to say “what are you waiting for?”
So as I say they can tell time
They possess a special gene just like us
Smarty pants eh?...

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he said
he could win a woman
with a smile
and just one glance
his pretty smile
and perfect disposition
and by the
way he wears his pants.

She could get any man
with a pinch and
kiss on his cheek
wearing pretty dresses
making sure to
wink and speak
aint nothing like a woman
who wants to love a man
making po'guys angry
and woman snear when
they glance...

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All you classy ladies of Poetry Soup

You're a real delicacy without a doubt

To the very last one, you are the cat's meow

The bee's knees... the cat's pyjamas!

By any chance, am I dating myself

So all you smarty pants dudes

What is today's version of these delightful phrases

To me you guys are all simply DEE-LICIOUS!



© Jack Ellison 2014...

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I just went to my work's Christmas party 
I got drunk on some rum with Bacardi 
Told my boss, to go get lost 
Said, "I'm the boss, Applesauce" 
Then, she fired me for being a smarty 

I went home, told my wife, I retired 
She said, "don't lie...I know you were fired" 
Said, Applesauce...I'm the boss 
Never tell me...to get lost 
Now go back- 'cause you've just been rehired...

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He was skinny as a rail
Dared not put him on a scale
He grew much fatter
Didn’t seem to matter
I knew that he could not fail
~
She livened every party
Always knew she was hearty
She wailed when over
Like she was rover
Howls making her a smarty
~
I left him there in the past
Despite all that he had asked
Begging me to stay
Had to make him pay
Leaving had to be done fast...

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six little girls made it to Luella’s faerie tea party
the food was dainty, crispy, sugary, nothing hearty
they ate their cookies and laughed about her brother Marty
who was making silly faces, a nine-year-old boy, a smarty

Luella complained to her mother, he was ruining her party.
Her mother made him leave, her adorable brother, Marty.
some girls were not having as much fun, their laughs not as hearty.
not having older brothers, they had been delighted by Marty....

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when you smoke It's no joke smoking turns lungs black and causes you to hack
If you go ahead and smoke you are going to croak If you smoke pot your brain will rot
When you drink beer you can't think clear when you drink booze your brain will snooze
If you take a drug you will turn into a slug when you get high you might try to fly and 
you will die. If you go to a party be like a smarty make the right choice if you never 
drink and drive you will have a good chance of staying alive...

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