Short Gags Poems

bullhorns in their hands
the right of free speech for all
gags in their pockets...

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Could it be heart brake
Which gags this young girls soul
Never casing pain
Shoved in her face everyday
That aids this wound  which must stay...

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Stan was one of those insensitive blokes, 
who gorged on Jerusalem artichokes,
when gas formed in his gut,
he thanked God for a butt...
now the entire USA gags and chokes....

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Them~

He walks~
He balks~

He hawks~
He squawks~

He caulks~
He stalks~

~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~
She nags~
She wags~

She gags~
She shags~

She rags~
She sags~

Them ~...

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Sick waves tumble guts.
Quick gags stifle lunch.
Motions blurred gray illusion,
Icy spray sea infusion.
Slate fogged sky ahead and back,
Compass swinging out of whack.
Skid, slip, spin, and fall.
Don't panic, swim call....

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a knock at his door
  signal of war
he knows no more

arrive at the line
  cigarette kills the time
silence jars his mind

bullets float past his head
  he fancies himself dead
meadow's splattered blood-red

he chokes, gags and he runs
  falls to the ground, done
glorious victory, hard-won...

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When
He said
Romance gags me
You waste your time
Love is for weaklings
I
Wasn’t dead
 yet

When
He said
Plant only
Food
Dump
Out the flowers
I
Wasn’t 
Dead 
yet

When
He said
Close all the windows
Seal all the cracks
I
Wasn’t dead 
yet
 
when
the moonlight faded
I 
                 crawled away

I
Wasn’t 
Dead Yet....

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Don´t walk on the grass

 Do not have thoughts and opinions  
 That is not the official western version of democracy.
Do not tell gags that is funny, it will upset someone
that find it invasive and crude
Humour is not comical especially if irony is involved.
We are living in a woke time and like covid disappear
In the meantime, be careful of what you say....

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Hot peppers and spicy horseradish
   a gut-punch to the solar plexus
 Snake venom with moldy cheese
   not tonight, if you please...

 Tadpole skins and locust larvae
   strains my stomach of iron
 But a bloody Mary eggnog combo
   gags the esophagus of this Hawaiian

 Wonder how I developed my bizarre sense of taste?
   ~ A flush of the toilet for whoever said, 'Haste makes waste'...

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Warped up resembling a wave
His cresting eyes
Gives me the whirls of a dark pool
And his fringe is flattering

And when he trots
It’s not the steel built 
Or the man-boobs
It’s the fringe that I’m use to

Dear Marwan,
So full of it
And thus far I snicker
So joyous at your gags

But that fringe
That so, so appealing fringe
Is what I write
In this poem


*Dedicated to Sarcastic-Perverted-MarWan*...

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Lloyd and Harry, two dim witted men
they made me laugh, laugh, then laugh again
with their innocent acts
slapstick, gags and wisecracks 
I love this movie, well now and then.

Nowt funnier than dumb and dumber 
this great film makes me laugh and blubber
so fills my mind with glee
because they are like me
I'm stupid, but a lot chubbier.

3/13/2018
contest, favorite comedy movie,
Sponsored by: Alexis Y....

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Attention Mr Funny Man 
enlighten us clean pun,
Be the sport with thunder thought
Funny man be fun.

We're waiting on ridiculous...
gags and comedy,
The humourous and numerous 
jest and parody.

Be a fool and do it cool
with wacky be the dope,
Goosey-like, one not bright
C'mon tell a joke.

For we are girls that need some whirls and
happiness in being,
Win us all with comic sprawl
to chase you when your fleeing....

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Oh, the one on one days of yesterday,
Of boredom and babies and waiting.
Of school mornings and tagging along,
Brown paper bags, school songs.

The blowing of wind and weather,
Long stockings and hair and lunch bags,
Yellow buses and friends to savor,
Long highways, Texas dust gags.

Oh, Saturday morning quiet and wonder,
Pondering age and foreboding.
From childhood to now to that end of ends,
I stand, speak to my past now going....

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Well, we watched a movie at home tonight
   A Peter Sellers special, a true delight"
'Revenge of the Pink Panther,' from 1976
   It was full of sight gags and amazing tricks

If you haven't ever seen it, you really should
   They don't make movies today that are this good
You'll laugh so hard that your sides will ache
   So click it on the Internet, for goodness sake!

      Happy New Year, Fellow Soupers!
    (December 31, 2018, ~ 10:30 p.m.)...

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DEATH OF LOVE

When gazing at my
love-struck eyes
He said
"Romance gags me
Marriage is a business deal
Love is for weaklings"

I
Wasn’t dead
 yet

When
gazing at my garden
He said
"Plant only
Food
Dump
Out the flowers"

I
Wasn’t 
Dead 
yet

When gazing at the moon
He said
"Close all the windows
Seal all the cracks it
saves money"

I
Wasn’t dead 
yet"
 
when
the birdsong faded
in the silence
I crawled away

I
Wasn’t 
Dead Yet.


2013
Victoria Anderson-Throop...

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i wanted to beg you to hold me. 

i laid on my back, trying to catch my breath, 
but you wouldn't have noticed. 
you wouldn't have wanted to understand my yearning for any emotional connection. 

you wonder where my voice has gone as my tongue gags me in attempts to hold back 
three ferocious words... 
i focus on slowing my heartbeat and try not to notice your eyes diverting mine. 

fool me once, shame on you. 
fool me twice, shame on the both of us....

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Peripatetic movement impedes as I draw near to an atrocious condemned king
Probing him, in conceptualizing & equating potential 
Composure rapidly decomposes, investigating potential future
Ever so sickening to these eyes, sluggish gags massage my throat 
Am I to develop in any fashion of this creature? 
Recuperating composure and ingesting gags peripatetic movement finds its place in 
contemporary time
The words I articulate to such a fiend, “Hey dad, how’s it going?”...

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