Short Flatulence Poems

Short Flatulence Poems. Below are examples of the most popular short poems about Flatulence by PoetrySoup poets. Search short poems about Flatulence by length and keyword.


Magic Beans

Baked beans
Small 
Insignificant
Yet its properties so powerful
Causing flatulence
Some noisy
Others foetid in silence.
Categories: flatulence, fun,
Form: Free verse


Premium Member

Sound or No Sound as the case may be


Ladies, take my advice, ignore 
men who brag they have hot pants.
Yet Keep a safe distance,
it could be nothing more
than flatulence.
Categories: flatulence, humor,
Form: Light Verse
Premium Member

Silent John

no one was in the john that day
so I thought it’d be safe to stay
	I needed to sneeze
	with hands on my knees
blew the blockage from my…airway
Categories: flatulence, fun, funny, giggle, humor, humorous, silly,
Form: Limerick
Premium Member

The False Poet

Rhyming Senryu


        Prancing, arrogance,
        Such obnoxious flatulence.
        You, caught,in his trance.


                   6-8-2021
Categories: flatulence, corruption,
Form: Senryu

Puff the Poker Princess

She didn’t play poker so well.
Her bluff was as clear as a bell.
   Her insides would quaver
   So much that they gave her
A hell of a smell of a tell.
© Ed Morris  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: flatulence, funny, humorous,
Form: Limerick


Premium Member

Caught Stinky Ampersand In My Boot

I caught ampersand in my boot.
Go away I said or I’ll shoot.
Hilarious pout.

Arrogantly loud and not moot,
His flatulence was a big hoot.
And stinky, no doubt.
Categories: flatulence, 6th grade, 7th grade, 8th grade, 9th
Form: Tail-rhyme

Global Warming

Jan's Vicar loves raspberry art*
As much as an hot apple tart
But Jan is the judge
So give her a nudge
When the horse blows before the cart!

*aka  Flatulence staccato
Categories: flatulence, humor,
Form: Limerick

Epitaph For George - a Lethal Wind

EPITAPH - A LETHAL WIND

Here lies George, the sad deceased

Victim of flatulence released

The result: he would expire

Stood before an open fire


Geoffrey Brewer
15 Sept 2018
Categories: flatulence, death, eulogy,
Form: Epitaph
Premium Member

Classical Gas

There once was a woman of affluence
Who suffered from great bouts of flatulence
She held it all in
Until the day when
It came out in a jumbled grandiloquence


John G. Lawless
©8/3/2021
Categories: flatulence, humor,
Form: Limerick
Premium Member

Putrid Petulance

O' flatulence                                          
  
                                              tis human              
                                                 to air







*co-written with my hubby
Categories: flatulence, body, humor,
Form: Light Verse

Crabby

When wrinkles start appearing 
Getting deeper by the day
With liver spots accruing
And the hair is going grey 
The early morning aches and pains
A stomach growing flabby
The crows feet and the flatulence
No wonder you feel crabby
© John Fenn  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: flatulence, funny,
Form: Light Verse

Pickles

She was fat, not pregnant, to say the least.
She filled her plate at the family feast.
Craving pickles brought her down.
Howling laughter brought her frown.
Flatulence increased, festivities ceased!

© Dane Smith-Johnsen
October 16, 2010
Categories: flatulence, funny
Form: Limerick
Premium Member

Flatulence

Flatulence has many a name
I heard the poshest today
A saying oh so eloquent and fancy
It blew me away!

This saying is rather grand
Voiced only by the best
“Attention one and all”
“Who is responsible for?”

“That waft of unpleasantness”!!
© Deb M   Create an image from this poem.
Categories: flatulence, fun, humor, silly,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member

Jerico Raccoon

Jerico the raccoon lived in the land of cherry blossom buds.
He enjoyed his corn, spaghetti, and well-cheesed up spuds.
His flatulence had a marvelous effect on the flowers so bright.
An aroma that stayed with these beauties all through the night.
Categories: flatulence, animal,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member

Spitting On the Happy Couple

Spitting on the happy couple at Greek weddings Is a tradition that the bride and groom are really dreading There's another disgusting practice An exhibition of much flatulence By guests uttering “FTOU” it prevents bed-wetting (Look it up LOL)
Categories: flatulence, tribute,
Form: Limerick
Premium Member

Tick Tock - Itty Bitty

crepitus announces itself annoyed
at my impudence  as I climb the stairs
it speaks the language of stop, I don't

flatulence trumpets my presence
luckily no one is hear to breathe deep
another dead language of age

the sounds of decomposition make me smile
for even they can fill a blank page
Categories: flatulence, age, funny,
Form: Free verse
Premium Member

Flatulence of the Brain

Thoughts are growing
going faster
twisting spinning
a disaster
jumping thumping
bumping banging
alarms are ringing
clinging clanging
mental meltdown
overloading
whirlwind
brainstorm
mind exploding!

Brain brain 
go away
Robin doesn't
want to play
you just have
too much to say
save it for
another day!
Categories: flatulence, funny, introspection
Form: Light Verse
Premium Member

Wind Power

Wind Power, Progressive
flatulence -- no more whale' tales 
from shore to shore – 

Poor ocean dears
needing new steers,
bumping their heads
in our dark – 

“Old lamps for new”
your lantern for my
cute, feel-good spark...
         bumping their 
heads in our dark....
         bumping their
heads in our dark....
© Joe Dimino  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: flatulence, earth, environment, humorous, ocean, political, pollution, wisdom,
Form: Free verse
Premium Member

Flatulence Yes You Heard It

Flatulence has many endearing names
Most commonly known as a fart
A blow off, fluff, clanger, puff of love
Just a few from a long list and chart

Its an explosive common bodily function
Erupting, blowing ,wafting throughout the world 
Yet no matter how many times we hear one
We laugh like its the first one we have ever heard!!!
© Deb M   Create an image from this poem.
Categories: flatulence, fun, humor, nonsense, silly,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member

Flatulence

For goodness sake, please stop
farting! I can smell that
foul stench all around our
flat. It stinks like a dead
fish! Small kids find it great
fun to let rip with their
farts … and then leave the room !

For fun ... Inspired by F Plaiedes contest… I will go with my gut reaction and enter my Fireworks poem lol


09/22/16
Categories: flatulence, body, humorous, wind,
Form: Verse

Alien Flatulence

So Uranus smells of hydrogen sulphide 
In the atmosphere on the higher side
With the planet’s unfortunate name
It is the butt of most astronomy jokes to blame
With hydrogen sulphide so flatulent 
It enhances the jokes and is heaven sent
With the gas of the rotten egg smell
We can laugh on forever and chuckle so well.

© Paul Warren Poetry
Categories: flatulence, planet, space,
Form: Ballad

Nitrous Oxide

When I let one loose in the elevator,
    I blamed it on last night's baked beans.
    The blast from it sounded like thunder,
    As it tore a large hole in my jeans.

    I apologised to all and sundry,
    For acting like, a silly jackass.
    But my voice became rather squeaky,
    As my flatulence, was pure laughing gas.

    8 / 7 / 2021.
Categories: flatulence, humorous, wind,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member

Loving Flatulence - First Place Contest Winner

Written: June 21, 2023 POOP Poetry Contest Sponsored by: JAN ALLISON ________________________________________________________________ He admired her from the start, and she quickly stole his heart. One thing, though, wasn't fair, with love mood in the air, she widespread love with a fart!
© Sotto Poet  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: flatulence, analogy, humorous, longing,
Form: Limerick

Who Can I Blame

He who smelt it
He must have dealt it
What is the odor
That lingers over
Turn on the fan
Open the window
To clear the smell
From in this room
Who can I blame
For this flatulence
What is the name
I will find out
Someone I’ll shame
As I go searching
I have found out
There’s no-one here
So was it me
Who let it out
Yes it must be
I did just shout
Categories: flatulence, imagination
Form: Free verse

Bare Up

Both Kamala and Newsom confess
California is in a big mess
Pelosi has found
Elephants abound
And their flatulence causes distress*



* Trump's childish attempt to replace
California's Governor with a toady to
support Trump's claim to have won the
2020 election  cost California taxpayers
over $270-million!  Don't let him do that
to your State! 
Categories: flatulence, humor,
Form: Limerick
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