Schnook Poems | Examples

My Favourite Poet - Inspired by Arthur Vaso's Poem of the Day

 
My favourite poet is ME
I’m obsessed with pooping and pee
So I’m a crap poet
Oh boy do I know it
My poem fans may disagree!
 
Some people may think I’m a schnook
For writing a second rude book
But I’m not lost for words
Writing of pee and turds
When published, will YOU dare to look!

Lawn Mowing Wars

The thick numerous shoots of grass have come out,
no more snow shovels til late autumn comes about.
I hear the robins chirp as they tend their nests,
wait....the sound of a cranky lawn mower chugging
to life from its winter's rest!
Quickly, dear, go out and mow before everyone else
does!
our yard needs to look perfect, 'cuz-
the neighborhood spring lawn mowing wars have
just begun,
it's quite serious, not so much fun.

Yard envy is so common in our subdivision,
The HOA "Yard Of The Month" prize brings derision.
If the young couple who just moved in across the
street think their landscaping is the best,
my roses and begonias will put them to the test.

Hubby can't start the riding mower,
he's cursing its parentage midst dandelions
and clover.
The other men in the cul-de-sac are already
halfway done,
as their wives bring out iced tea for them
under the strong sun.
Well, well, tomorrow is the neighborhood
block party,
I've already made an array of warm weather
dishes so hearty,
My potato salad and baked beans will surely
be the envy of the other cooks,
it is in the good 'ol American spirit-
to compete and be a smug schnook!  ~

Bittersweet

Bittersweet is the weeping ~ when loving someone not yours for keeping

Don't be a simpleton, a schnook ~ I'm not writing a history book

LET'S RHYME-

Let’s rhyme as if we can and could
uncaught poet's schnook traced and pushed.
Writing rhymes words fluent posed well N, good
Poet on the end of each sentence a hood and crook
mellow laden handwritten booked completed on in brook.
Seasoned autumn ledger recital pure cured pushed
Poet's words from mine breath heart felt procured.
Allured contoured letters combine words understood.
Messages misconstrued over look, only would.
Letters combined lured, cured written underfoot
Poet's charcoal signing autographed in soot
Uncaught poet rhymes schnook and pushed
Let’s rhyme as if he can and he sure could.

12/11/23
For let's rhyme Poetry Contest
Monorhyme poetry form only.

Sponsored by: Shadow Hamilton

Who Is That Masked Man

Who Is That Masked Man
Miracle Man
October 6, 2023

Many will see him as being another schnook,
perhaps questioning if he’s ever had a real job.
But in my mind I see an unpunished crook,
someone with possible connections to the mob.

Each day his cognizance needs clarifying,
but in his world he’s convinced he’s grooving.
He hesitates saying “if I’m lying I’m dying,”
because he typically is if his lips are moving.

Bad Thief

First day
No way

Lost book
He took

No good
A hood

Bad thief
My beef

Loud shout
Found out

Poor schnook
A crook

In court
Have tort

No bail
In jail

Too bad
Not sad

Donkey's Destiny

Donkey Neigh flaunted his family, hence Sis, the cat, purred,
"My male ancestors are viewed very well in the Good Book."
Whereupon, Sis drives the point home, "I'll wager you’ve NOT heard, 
we cats proudly hail from the Lion of Judah, you schnook!"

"My male ancestors are viewed very well in the Good Book,
we donkeys bore His mother, Mary, to Bethlehem town.”
"We cats proudly hail from the Lion of Judah, you schnook!"
Neigh crows, "Jesus rode grandpa wearing Jerusalem’s crown,

we donkeys bore His mother, Mary, to Bethlehem town.”
Cat nuzzles up to donkey. She chides, "Enough bragging, Neigh.”
Neigh crows, "Jesus rode grandpa wearing Jerusalem’s crown
while those conniving humans planned His fate along the way."

Cat nuzzles up to donkey. She chides, "Enough bragging, Neigh!"
Whereupon, Sis drives the point home, "I'll wager you’ve NOT heard, 
while those conniving humans planned his fate along the way, 
Donkey Neigh flaunted his family.” Hence, Sis, the cat, purred.

April 11, 2020

Gif #2
contest: Pantoum Rhyme Personification
sponsor: Eve Roper

Crook

Crook!
She stole my guidebook,
my pink Ray-Bans, my outlook
— it’s grim. The schnook
snatched my Diamonte fountain pen. She took

my attaché case filled with cash. Forsook
my manners — she’s in my grip. A sirloin meat hook
indubitably-yes or to pressure-cook.

I turned her upside-down and shook

A nearby copper brings us in after he has a look.
The judge closed the book

on me. Called me a crook…
that schnook!

8/5/2019

Natural Born Comedians

Natural Born Comedians

I had a class of sixth graders in Chicago,
Absolutely like no other.
Never a class so full of smiles and
hilarious pranks.
Their boundless joy rolled over me like
a huge Sherman tank.

I think they had their own student
lesson plan book,
Whose main topic was: "Let's make
Mrs. R. look like a schnook."
Don't ever tell them, please promise?
It was the best year of my life.

Anyway, I got all the silly kids no
teacher wanted.( The tight-***ed
teachers, I mean.)
To me, these children were sunbeams 
of joy in my life, each day undaunted!
At times, they made me laugh so hard.
They were far more creative than any
Second City Improv.

So thank you God for a class of sparkling
sunbeams you gave me for a year.
Only one thing remained on my desk
when they all were gone!

Stillness, silence, empty chairs, 
And the splash of my salty tears falling 
on my barren desk!

Panagiota Romios
3/22/2019

This Silly Old Schnook

As well as my charm and amazing good looks
You'd think I had tentacles like an oversexed octopus
My looks tend to make
Young girlies double take
And fight for a piece of this silly old schnook

Quite a Schnook

In spite of my charm and extremely good looks
There's times when I can be quite a schnook
When the girlies turn me down
Ends up more than a frown
But still, tend to get my way by hook or by crook

Sweet Penuche

With body and mind you respond to my touch,
gobbling up kisses, like sweet penuche,
I could not ask for a better lover; there is nonesuch.
When I grind my gears, you become my clutch
and I lean on you like an emotional crutch.

A magic elixir, you quench my heart
like sweet nectar, neither bitter nor tart.
Forged on passion's anvil, your lovemaking's an art. 
And paused on the moment, my smile presses restart.

Your granite body buffed to a sheen
has a vulnerable heart; you're not a machine.
And yet, you make the impossible look routine.

With rippled muscles, as though chiseled from stone,
you're a warm schnook where dreams have blown,

You're the wind in my sails, without uttering a sound.

Behind the scenes, you don't speak much,
but like dawn's first light, you offer a new start.
Cushioning my falls, you spot me on life's trampoline
and somewhere between estrogen and testosterone
you find balance, both feet firm on the ground.


(Minuanetta)


1/26/2018

The Book

The Book
Written: by Tom Wright
8-15-2016

Each day of my life has been a page of a book,
Many who are reading it may think I’m a schnook.

It’s a book being written, nothing held in reserve,
Not a NY Times best seller or one to preserve.

You’ll find some dog eared pages, yellow and worn,
Others filled with ridicule, complacency or scorn.

This book isn’t fiction but of a life mostly passed,
Many pages were sunny but some were overcast.

Some pages paint a picture of a man filled with rage,
But that was before Jesus began editing that page.

You may form opinions, standing pat in your belief,
But only God will soon judge me, as editor in chief.

It's What It Is

IT’S WHAT IT IS …
If every day you sleep in church; you may not know God
You are not necessarily spiritual; but you are pious
If you’ve grade 99.9%, you’re not most educated; but you’ve first class
You are what you are, and it’s what it is

When she exhibits temperance, then she is neither lustful nor concupiscent
When she’s apparently courageous, she’s neither hotheaded nor irascible
When she adds reason in action, oh yes she be prudent
She is what she is, and it’s what it is 

Because he drives he is a driver
And in so far as he plays the flute, ‘flutist’ captures him
Because he plays well the inflated round leather, dub him a footballer
For that is what he is, and it’s what it is

Assuming I be easily deceived and very unintelligent; am foolish and simpleton
What if I be a schmuck or schnook, pity me for I am stupid!
Honest description depicts reality; but malevolent eulogies do not
They give either sheer flattery or mere insults; all in all, it is what it is

Yes! You’re good, because you are
You’re bad, just because you really are
Always, words may not express aptly
But come what may, it’s what it is!

A World Without Rhyme

I woke up this morning at 7 am
Off to labor like a great big schnook
When I got home I sat down to rest
Beside the fireplace with my favorite _______

I soon fell fast asleep
And went into a vivid dream
The skies were ever so blue
And the trees ever so________

Now I’m flying through the air
Along with the birds and the bees
Oh no the alarm went off...work again!
But you know what... I can’t find my _______

Wow what a strange and beautiful dream
Maybe I’ll lay down and dream some more
But hey I may still be dreaming
Because I see words all over my_______

Feb.01.2016

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