Long Self hatred Poems

She was always so insecure, as far back as I can remember she never realized her true worth, she let people use her, and never cared about getting hurt
If everyone else was happy and smiling,...

Read More

Fr. Time is with us today, again, 
or still bilateral, 
I guess I should before
and after say.

No, you just did
how I will play.  
You would be redundant, 
to say it again, 
like I just...

Read More

He who is contented is rich
He who is determined has strength of will
                      Laotse,...

Read More

What might it take for love to conquer anger
fear
hate?

How is holistic compassion already more contagious than a-holistic self-hatred,
we-hatred?

There is more than one way to hear a**holistic here,
but they all have to do with sectarian divides,...

Read More

Treat this poem as the truth
Non-fiction...
Because this is the best way I can try to describe what it feels like to suffer with cocaine addiction
It’s hard to even put this feeling of addiction into words
To...

Read More

My grandparents' grandparents,
all sixteen,
digging roots through cultural meristems,
young adults,
adolescents during Time's 1880's,
post Civil War birth of Sir James Crow monoculture.

What would we name this self-hatred,
this lack of compassion and gratitude for help
for human nature's lavish...

Read More

I don’t remember my first introduction to the idea of same sex couples. I don’t remember the first time I was told it was a “bad” thing.
All I remember is how it felt each time...

Read More

All are walking to the courtyard the bell has tolled it’s time to start, they have all but arranged the wooden stakes they are just waiting to ignite the spark
Everyone stops and stares as I...

Read More

Could we see and hear and feel and think better
more ubiquitously and cooperatively
and inclusively
if DreamTime speaks in naturally eco-logical language
of motion as emotions
co-empathically accessible
to all RNA/DNA informated
integratively regenerative
co-arising ecosystemic Ego-programs?

In our dreams
we all speak the...

Read More

Pronoia's Paradise of CoEmpathic Trust
is what happens in
and on
and as a holonic soul of 
Earth
when we expect,
anticipate,
the absence of Business As Usual (BAU) 
Win/Lose 0-sum Paranoia.

Paranoia is suffering in fear
and concomitant chronic anger management
and ambivalent...

Read More

Sitting on a stack of old portraits
Feeling like an ill fated king, destined to be dethroned
Lonely and long since forgotten
At least that’s the narrative my mind conjures up
Whether it breathes truth, as always
A matter of...

Read More

Inspired by Andrew Wyeth Watercolor Painting -- Wind From the Sea, 1947




Standing in the old house
A strange mixture of feelings erupt within me
My roommates Depression, Loneliness, and Hopelessness
Greet me with strangling arms and leering grins
I...

Read More

Inspired by Andrew Wyeth Watercolor Painting -- Wind From the Sea, 1947




Standing in the old house
A strange mixture of feelings erupt within me
My roommates Depression, Loneliness, and Hopelessness
Greet me with strangling arms and leering grins
I...

Read More

What is dogmatically
unchangingly fundamental to Christianity,
and to all win/win positive faith systems,
is certainly not capitalism's ZeroSum economic assumptions
in which winner god takes all
from loser satan.

But, what is fundamental compassion's truth
is profoundly sacred
globally open-systemic theology
of HolySpirit...

Read More

Under the firmament 
Vying  to escape the dome  of purgatory 
A trap which seems permanent 
Filled with negative energy and pain
Stuck on a plain 
That plays tricks on the brain 
Driving souls insane 
Desensitized to...

Read More

I try hard, to make you understand
So we can remain friends- hand in hand
But as time moves on it all fades away
And I'm left, the inadequate fool

Often I find I cannot repress these tears at...

Read More

I forgive you mother and father
For your mistakes
Will I be forgiven for mine? 
They say the sins of the parents
Shall be visited upon the children
So they have visited
And I embraced them 
In times of uncertainty
And...

Read More

Here's a story poem about a girl's tragic descent, imbued with dark imagery:
A Broken Doll's Lament
Tiny fingers, a gap in the wood, a scene etched in fright,
A scream ripped from silence, shattering the night.
Mother, a...

Read More

It's been getting worse
I see the end in the most innocent of items
I dream of death
Death of my family, friends
Ironically never of myself
The hollow inside my chest isn't leaving
self hatred comes easily
unhealthy coping habits are...

Read More

Dear Satan,
You are a formidable foe, I grant you,
For you confuse the Body of Christ, my Body into hating itself, reified and 
fractured into tormented factions on my cross,
For you confuse my Children into doubting...

Read More

Sitting on the bed, legs crossed, and still, 
She sits and wonders how her life could be so real 
that it's like a fantasy – a fantasy gone bad. 
She stops and smiles at herself...

Read More

A preconception in my mind
Of a nudist beach in the sun
Men of pervy persuasion 
Roam the sands 
Eyes behind dark glasses
Men with their dangly bits 
A display of exhibitionism?
A desire to be seen?
A legalised flasher...

Read More

I live, letting life’s events blow along with the wind; inhaling the scented, crisp breeze. I seldom sit down and question my purpose, instead I flow from the water which I arose from. Though the...

Read More

Slavery
enslavement
force of self-imposed ownership 
overpowering another's ego-ownership,
anthro-morbid,
collective ego-morphic tolerance of identity rape,
fear and anger, together building hate,
from which enslavement derives;
a culturally camouflaged nondual co-arising relationship
of codependent despair,
self-hatred.

Enslaving force perpetuates Ego's full-blown angry reduction
in self-identity,
deduction of...

Read More

Selfishly or        
          helplessly 
As I lay here internally beat
Battered and bruised full of defeat 
My pillow so wet...

Read More