Long Rhinoceros Poems

Ten slices of pure marmalade plus two years of misted Karmapa bread equals? Oh do hurry up. The sum is easy. Oh ok then try another. Twelve custard tarts divided by an in between feathered...

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Animal Poems II

These are poems about animals, limericks and other forms of doggerel.



Ballade of the Bicameral Camel
by Michael R. Burch

There once was a camel who loved to hump.
Please get your lewd minds out of their...

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LIGHT VERSE AND NONSENSE VERSE VI

On the Horns of a Dilemma (I)
by Michael R. Burch

Love has become preposterous
for the over-endowed rhinoceros:
when he meets the right miss
how the hell can he kiss
when his horn deforms her...

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These are poems about animals by Michael R. Burch

Clyde Lied!
by Michael R. Burch

There once was a mockingbird, Clyde,
who bragged of his prowess, but lied.
To his new wife he sighed,
“When again, gentle bride?”
“Nevermore!” bright-eyed Raven replied.



The...

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One leaf falls
holographic illusion
across time the Terminator travels
to shape Sarah Connors' destiny.
Heart attack
a common enough destiny
as common as young men discussing girls' tits.
The Constitution
is the document we refer to, the lodestone
to correct course and not...

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It never melted for starters
but then you have to start somewhere
the Magic Icicle could talk
it had humors jealousies aversions
deep rending tides of love
and week long fits of giggling
It had been crafted by Father Frost
The Emperor...

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"The Mallard" and other Animal Limericks

The Mallard
by Michael R. Burch

The mallard is a fellow
whose lips are long and yellow
with which he, honking, kisses
his bawdy, boisterous mistress;
my pond's their loud bordello!



On the Horns of a Dilemma...

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More Horn Humdrum KISS Poems

Will have total, complete trust in my security
Once I know it does not have a single impurity.

When with God I want to increase my appeal
More to Him should pray while I...

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Hunamity and Our Sanity

Not only some but all the time
Committing sin sure is a crime
That has been against humanity
And along with all of our sanity;
Never ever sinning is so sublime.

James Thesarious Hilarious Philosopher Horn
Retired and...

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A back flipping coconut is very very amusing at a ball but ball pits are moving around so one must surely wear wellingtons or a pair of anglers' waders when jumping across such multicoloured curves....

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1-The overall weight of the ants on earth is:

A/more than 10 times the weight of humans
B/ more than 2 times the weight of humans
C/equal to the weight of humans.
Answer: A

2-Only the crocodile is capable of:...

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DISCLAIMER: This piece, dear readers, is in no way, shape, or form intended to be a scholarly treatise. So, please bear that in mind and refrain from reporting me to the SPCA or any other...

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[Poo and poop... same thing]

                              ...

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Sleepy, I walked down the senior hallway
The last door on the left seemed miles away
But I was determined to make it
It was 7:26 in the morning, assignment due 7:30
My hands were sweating bullets
Felt as if...

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HIS   WISH   TO   STOP  ZEBRAS  FISHING

Zebras you, Xavier, want very urgently to sit real quiet,
Pound over numberless  marine  liquid  kilometers just in haste, ...

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I like it when I go with one of them as I don't have to drive and I can enjoy 
God's  wonders.  Yesterday our tank fitting took us east to the town of...

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This is the land
known for its unique diversity
You don't have to search very hard,
just look around at the different exotic trees
The baobab and the coconut,
the eucalyptus and the almug
History books have done this place an...

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Rhinoceros can not spell its name
African beasts aren't made that way 
No pen or paper on the savanna green
3 big toes get in the way of nature
They squint
Can't see to write with so much sun
Dust...

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Enormous gentle beast
Equals man's compassion.
Each has powerful strength,
Ears that have massive size.
Elongated nose helps
Enrich all its senses.
Earth's largest animal.

9-18-16
Pleiades E Poetry Contest
Sponsor Kim Merryman

Note:
Compassion and Altruism:
Compassion is not reserved for offspring alone in elephant society....

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Strolling thro' the zoo today, gazing at the various creatures,
I marveled at their shapes, colors and other distinctive features.
Some were graceful and sweet, others were cute and cuddly;
Others were grumpy and clumsy - some were...

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~The Unicorn~
There is a woman who has a passion
Not for a man and not for a fashion
Her passion is for a horse, a horse with a horn.
Commonly known as a mystical unicorn.

This mythical beast from...

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~The Rhinoceros That Roared~

The Wrinkled skin of the Rhinoceros
Steel hard, no man can penetrate
The young buck on the tourist bus
Thought if he killed one, his lovers heart he could take.

He wanted to be a macho...

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I was diagnosed with double-pneumonia on the 15th and classes started on the 17th. I’m already getting nagmail about assignments, yea! I’ll be behind and virtual for a while. It started as a rhinovirus, honestly,...

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Swimming in the river were some elephants 
They were giving themselves a bath 
And over by the river bank 
Was a lonesome male giraffe
 
From the murky waters peeking out 
Were a crocodiles eyes 
He...

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1/22/16


Always negative
Is not a good way to live

Be positive
And think cognitive

Don't speak derogative
Because that is preposterous
Considering that there will always be contrast and opposites

Across areas full of rocks having traces of phosphorous
And nearby deposits with...

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