The Terminator

One leaf falls holographic illusion across time the Terminator travels to shape Sarah Connors' destiny. Heart attack a common enough destiny as common as young men discussing girls' ****. The Constitution is the document we refer to, the lodestone to correct course and not go crazily astray. Lose all purpose beyond murder, child sex and food hording. Illuminated manuscripts in a dark age, tape decks remind us of our voice our communal voice Supremes and Fred Astaire the silken wail. I lie alone in the night its sensuality makes the best sense it does or does not clarify the day of classes or clients or chain saws whatever fever may have infected me at the moment a fever to achieve access to foreign films while living in the mountain community of Schroon Lake the fever to instruct the American people how to apply ideals and practicalities of Constitution to international relationships the fever not to die today, to maintain consciousness just one more season (and one more after that). Anyway, what is being discussed - the finiteness of one life - or perhaps existence continues in another dimension, on another frequency no owl hoots but other purpler and indigo occurrences with other purposes as incomprehensible and wonderful as these purposes to choke on a cherry pit or nuclear bomb to wail our wail together each individual identifiable hoot and wail, loud laugh and suppressed scream one orbicular chant, humanity, from India to Indiana complete, one sing. I feel this way searching for my place among you childless, but a child among children obeying or not obeying the speed limit as my hormones permit everywhere among brothers, the sisters among sisters the races together exterminating the last rhinoceros and preserving its genes at the zoological society my species attacking entire rain forests, temperate forests and boreal forests like the engraver beetle in the red pine's inner bark. Thus, I occasionally cheer the Terminator cheer the machine and neutron bomb even in the face of individual heroics, the male and female face their physical love, tender and violent I don't know what I want. It could be simple as this headache. Not to despair just to care enough to think clearly and accept 10,000 years of history. Not to hate those in authority humor is the only remedy yellow ape teeth chimping in the glass death face and ritual is remedy a death song and one for planting and one for the beginning of loving.