Long Mince Poems

A prawn masquerading as a peanut can be quite disturbing. So many times a peel is a garment used to shroud. A tentacle hidden. Here and there. Then to reappear with an often violent burst...

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It was the time before the celebration on Saint Peter’s day, when the noble page took a fine white scroll and was glad upon his way.
For a bird had whispered in this good page’s ear...

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So I have some things, that I just have to say,
but please do not take me in the wrong way,
I have this tiny little problem, inside me you see,
and its called trying to live with...

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'Twas the night before Christmas and outside was blizzardly
Mrs Claus was busy hanging baubles on the Christmas tree
Santa felt cold and shivery and was succumbing to the flu
And told Mrs Claus "I'm feeling ill, what...

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Non labor (relations) day September 1st, 2023 poem

Aye dream of Genie (as a lad din)
Schwenksville, Pennsylvania -
keystone state abbreviated as Pea Yay,
this stupid non huge poem
deployed courtesy scholar
really...a boot nuttin
butta an overrated allay
zee good for...

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twiglets embrace as thorns and flowers

                             ...

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Mitchboggin and Sillyah were best beasties for three years,
until Mitchboggin thought it would be okay, humorous even,
To make fun of orange-stomached elves,
much like some ignorants make fun of star-belly gomach-tangs.

Mitchboggin had grown up thinking this...

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My Arkea Ultime Challenge race,
Solo race around the world,
It is the poetry that I trace day by day,
My trimaran is happiness and its sails,
I can go around the world, with,
From my home port, Brest,
Crossing Cape...

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Midnight at Blackfriars 
  
The city spires are hidden, 
It’s getting colder fast, 
It feels as though we might have 
Some snow this month at last. 
The wind sweeps keenly through St. Giles(1) 
The...

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No winter postcards of deep snow and bliss
No winter postcards of mistletoe kiss
Winter was cold, winter was tough
Winter was long and we all had it rough
No Father Christmas, no presents for us
No wide eyed kitten...

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Fizzy Christmas
By Danny Sroda

There is a story which has been untold
Which I cannot any more withhold
It's about a man who you all know
Who lives out in the land of snow
Father Christmas was his name
Until that...

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I have waited for the New Age--that Tranelike return to my Mediterranean Sundance Always and Forever missing the  journey of the Caravansary of old.
Hence, Only Time and the touch of the Rio Ancho, its...

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I can feel the sun warming my body and the universe telling me that it is sorry, the clouds are rolling by and the burden is lifted from the sky. The traffic is rolling and...

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Let’s begin with
A strong fresh
Brewed Greek coffee
The aroma alone,
Will wake up 
Your senses, 
Allow you to
Let go, to keep 
An open mind to delight
And excite 
You, relax your taste buds.
About to travel,
Don’t put up fences,
Today...

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Though (supposedly) only
     the good die young, urn holding
     cremated ashes a mere cup
full, every last man standing falls,
     cuz nobody else
 ...

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On the Twenty Fifth, December Night,
Black Skies Sparkle with  bright light!
Church Bells ring,Ding!Dong!Ding!
Chores of angels  ,start to sing!
Merry Christmas!Everyone!
Happy Birthday,Jesus Son.

We rejoice in prayer and joy,
as We thank this New Born Boy,
He is...

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Mince Meat Pie No Lie

Oh great! Found that some guy forgot to stipulate
How he knows people hate to wait or set a date
Important enough and already been accentuated
And, would you believe, destroyed, defecated and then...

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(Revised with new homophone added in. Thanks for the catch, Becca!)

*Wants upon **uh thyme inn uh would, uh vary gneiss prints named Hairy
met inn the missed, hi awn the bow of uh tree- uh ferry...

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Dear Santa,
As you may well know, 
it's tights and not stockings that are all the go.
So, with no stockings to hang on the bedstead, 
would a pair of my bloomers be OK instead?
I'll sew up...

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within the under belly of
this hob bull ling Leviathan beast
induced roaring hungry soundcloud issued
within abdominal folds
finding they in creased

never diminishing, matter
whether I turn north, south, west or east
this adult desired,
soon after he envisioned
buttered crispy dish...

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Arduous agonizing affliction
doth unrelentingly assail...
aghast to exhale lest...lose
desperate clinging clutch
held by bloodied cracked fingernail
phantasmagoric tendrils constrict

stoppering me to whisper or wail
yawning abyss menacingly beseeches
hmm...release could immediately curtail
cumulative (lifetime's worth) travail
freefalling, pirouetting unnervingly,
unstoppably, unwaveringly... zipping

into infinite...

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In the beginning there was a lonely word but soon after
            there was no room at the meagre hostel for the saviour

Sanguine hopes flash-flooded...

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Another Christmas day is finally here
The very thought fills me with such fear
I have to try and control my old Aunty Mable
Once she hits the gin she gets very unstable

Uncle Arthur rushes in and opens...

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Father Christmas in the night sky his sleigh and reindeer a silhouette in the moonlight,
He has traveled all over the world to lavish his presents to small sleeping children,
The family has retired and left a...

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When Father Christmas called

By Stanley Russell Harris 
 The new mad author

Christmas day was so such fun, especially when I was young.
I tried to stay awake all night, the one called Christmas Eve that’s right.
My...

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