Long Malfunctioning Poems
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February 27th, 2018 literary tinkering rejiggered October 11th, 2024
February 27th, 2018 literary tinkering rejiggered October 11th, 2024
I believed fortune cookie maxim
cryptic message couched
Apple Macbook Pro update process
alternately titled “markedly
a Luke warm welcome Matt unfurled
courtesy Jimmy John,
who embarked on
imp apostle bull...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, absence, abuse, adventure, allegory, allusion, analogy, autumn,
Form:
Free verse
Defecation accidentally clogged
Defecation accidentally clogged...
for the umpteenth time
during spate to sit scrawny buttucks
on porcelain throne id est
videre licet toilet bowl...
with toxic water brew threatening
to overflow onto the floor,
and hence found yours truly (me)
immersing himself...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, adventure, analogy, angel, blessing, december, extended metaphor,
Form:
Free verse
June 12th 2017 Transition Revisited and Revised Today 4 2 2021
June 12th 2017 TRANSITION revisited and revised today 4/2/2021
While scrolling over outdated docs
(i.e. namely OpenOffice documents)
derrière seated upon hard backed chair,
yours truly came upon following poem
to share with anonymous readers,
whereby slight modifications
got made to...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, adventure, angel, anxiety, blessing, conflict, husband, july,
Form:
Rhyme
Ah Tis Nothing Greater Than
Ah... tis nothing greater than...
malfunctioning heater
on that brisk winter day
recorded here as proof positive
regarding following reasonable rhyme.
While scrolling thru
poems crafted yesteryear,
I chanced to jog my memory where
there
occurred power outage necessitated
more than divine...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 12th grade, angst, dark, environment, faith, humorous,
Form:
Rhyme
Ability To Defecate Wildly Swings Both Ways
Ability to defecate wildly swings (both ways)...
between incontinence and constipation
Irritable bowel syndrome i.e.
the former excretory bout I address
the above (polite way to phrase diarrhea)
and avoid moon efficient cheekiness,
yours truly doth buttress,
a literal warranted pain in...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 12th grade, adventure, desire, health, imagery, recovery
Form:
Free verse
Hyundai Sonata Malfunctioning Brake Caliper Blues
tweaked to pass inspection broadcast on the double
(alternately titled snafu: ma bell heave hubble
vehicular repairs (prohibitive)
finds me bleary eyed stupefied
and countenance grizzled with prickly stubble
collapsed amidst virtual rubble).
Best sung courtesy rotten dull liver:red worst
after words...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, adventure,
Form:
Dramatic Verse
Powering Down
"Your very Mature for your age"
What does the mean?
Why do I have to be mature to make friends
my description label is on my back
its all there i promise
i even wrote them myself
organized...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 10th grade, age, angst, anxiety, deep, depression,
Form:
Free verse
Dreams and vision's of the rapture by people on Cloud nine blessing and other sites
A young woman recently had a vision that she shared on Amber's Cloud nine
Blessings You Tube Channel. She saw a royal crown, and Jesus was reaching
his hand out underneath it, and there wasn't...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, 6th
Form:
Prose
Nostril Damn Mess
The putrid, malodorous and fowl nauseating smell
can still be conjured nearly fifty years later wracked
I never forget ineradicable tangy, sulfurous
acrid odor rankled olfaction tract
entire sinus cavity, yet...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, angst, anxiety, conflict, creation, horror, humorous, student,
Form:
Light Verse
Springing Into Action
I woke up late this morning, my phone was dead. I guess I never plugged it in, I found it buried under my pillow (erah!). I barely had time for anything, just managing to cover...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, education, happiness, morning, school, teen,
Form:
Free verse
Defecation Clogged Toilet Bowl
Defecation clogged toilet bowl...
courtesy prescription laxative AMITIZA
and found (me) zee papa pooped out,
thus embarrassing communiqué I post,
a reasonably rhyming poetic shout
to air grievances
concerning outsize bowel movement
hoping (fat/slim chance)
Mike Rowe happens tubby about,
though shadow of doubt
he...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 12th grade, adventure, grief, humorous, muse, stress,
Form:
Rhyme
Laugh
If laughter is the only remedy for a broken-heart, then laugh; if laughter is the method to make your day start, laugh; laugh when you are feeling down, laugh when you want to frown, laugh...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, adventure, age, america, beautiful, best friend, city,
Form:
Free verse
Hyundai Sonata Malfunctioning Brake Caliper Blues
(alternately titled: ma bell heave hubble
vehicular repairs (prohibitive)
finds me bleary eyed stupefied
and countenance grizzled with prickly stubble
collapsed amidst virtual rubble).
Best sung courtesy rotten dull liver:red worst
after words which, I gotta quench mine...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, angel,
Form:
Free verse
Ah Tis Nothing Greater Than
Ah... tis nothing greater than...
malfunctioning heater on brisk winter day!
Thee particular date being
December twenty eighth,
two thousand nineteen, I saith
the Jack of all trades
maintenance technician
Kevin Blank said he would notify
HVAC expert in good faith,
yet to compliment...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, 9th
Form:
Free verse
Homo Sapience Sapience
He was born with a bushy round follicle-free head
and walks with two legs, because
he is a Neanderthal(1) mutant,
for he is a mutational product,
he is an android(2) not found in the evolutionary tree,
and...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, allegory,
Form:
Prose Poetry
DETACHED Part 2, A Female Humanoid Awakening , A Music Video 4K
"DETACHED" is not just a song—it's a rebellion from within. This hauntingly music video explores the clash between cold circuitry and the chaos of emotion in a world where artificial intelligence has evolved beyond fiction....
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Categories:
malfunctioning, conflict, confusion, emotions,
Form:
Lyric
Leg Twitches For Legatee
Quivering lowest limb
namely mine little feet
medication side effects
analogous running dead heat
most often while fast asleep
the missus claims thrashing feet
easily mistaken for epilepsy
disrupts her pleasant dreams
claiming legitimate grounds
for kickstarting divorce
bachelorhood amenable
versus her furious
expletive laced outbursts
crying out...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, body,
Form:
Footle
The Pacemaker
Although I was retired and full of energy, ...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, health, heart,
Form:
Couplet
Lost Causes Remastered
Santa Clauses were to be molten and reshaped into Holy Cross bunnies
on a mega 3D printer but then the app somehow went...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, easter,
Form:
Free verse
My Telephone Version 2
Winter nights, the darkness comes quick
Key in door, to an empty house
Jacket falls fast right on the floor
I stare at the stand, at the telephone for sure
There she sits, alone, unmoving
No blinking light
No message at...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, beauty, funny, funny love, giggle, introspection, longing,
Form:
Light Verse
Defecation Clogged Toilet Bowl Courtesy Metamucil
Defecation clogged toilet bowl courtesy metamucil..
and found (me) zee papa pooped out
Anal eyes zing thee
nightly dump for yesterday
July 8th, 2020 - whereby
plunger helped obstruction give way
I nearly lost me life and limb oy vey
oh my...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, adventure, dedication, desire, farewell, humorous, imagery, july,
Form:
Free verse
Convenience Afforded Microwave
Especially one courteously wrapped ably
anonymously gifted to
an aspiring gourmet Chef Boyardee
i.e. not surprisingly... revealing mystery
person none other than...
yepper namely me.
Moost anyone can show
off culinary karate chop
suey, whether schooled among
fishy creatures either
from black lagoon,
or privately tutored,
(this...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, 9th
Form:
Free verse
On Lacking Sticktoitiveness
Most of my Lix spittle
+ four additional anniversaries
since exiting birth canal
as full term newborn
re: minimally viable existence
post doc severance umbilical cord,
nevertheless yours truly
found himself figuratively
linkedin and tethered to lifeline
particularly in formative...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, betrayal,
Form:
Free verse
Me Creature of Comfort Bah
Me... creature of comfort? Bah
Once again mine lock, stock
and barrel trade in balderdash
finds yours truly (i.e. me)
to type poem frisson a$$ off
as dentures chatter and gnash,
while still inside me gobstopper,
(the sole way to generate
plea for...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, august,
Form:
Enclosed Rhyme
Why Men Are Called Groom and Women Bride
WHY MEN ARE CALLED GROOM AND WOMEN BRIDE
Hullabaloo and cacophony etched in your Union,
Soliloquies to break up with your said-protagonist of a spouse,
You forgot your beautiful euphony, word fusion
When the beginning of two you can't...
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Categories:
malfunctioning, 1st grade, for her, for him, husband,
Form:
Iambic Pentameter