Long Lassies Poems

Inspired by the painting "Highland Lassie" (1871) by Thomas Faed.

(Verse One; In introduction to Cailin)
Walkin' on the highways, searchin' down the byways,
Tromps a lonely figure on the Highland roads;
Peerin' from the Highdown, breezin' through the...

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(or swing sets and monkey bars)

A pitch perfect spring day
such as today April 8th, 2022
within quaint hamlet 
of Schwenksville, Pennsylvania
in close proximity within mind's eye
to Lake Wobegon, Minnesota
finds me reminiscing...

When, scads of light years ago
(half...

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The end to our sixteen years love affair
he didn't even try to hold on to my love
did I ever mean anything after that single wedding day
was this just your easiest way to be free of...

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Once upon a time in the lands from the north, south, east to west    
Navigating on the cold white sands formed of sugar and ice       ...

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Eighteen hundred and three begins U.S. destinies.
Merriwether Lewis and his comrade, William Clark, agrees –
They will go forth, avoid Frenchmen, fighting growling grizzlies.
To find a water trade route that flows west to the Pacific seas.
Louis...

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Take 1:
Too much beauty is a problem,
So the pretty women say,
Many women can be threatened,
Mood swings like a pendulum
Never trusting in ‘fair play.’

So it hurts when they dismiss you
Best to not give you a chance,
You...

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Butter Girl
Hey butter girl! You’re barmy in here there.
By that; in my pretty, little brown-heart;
Black boy’s heart. Or brown if you will!

Succumbed by taunting heat, how come you’re taunt ?
If you could do as much...

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Ladies and gentlemen, laddies, lassies one and all
Water, water everywhere, be careful lest you fall.
Please take into account, we've found wet boards do shrink
and remind your children,  this water's not to drink. 

WHY, ye...

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No objection to cold weather, but...

ah jest wanna boomerang back into the womb
to escape unrelenting forbidding gloom.
perhaps cuz mine generation 
nsync with baby boom.

No matter birth canal
long since got breached,
countless (three plus) scores of years
I...

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Job; a man of many troubles 
For a few months in his life
Endured much pain and sorrow
Even great loss of life

He was the richest man
That then the world had known
But Satan hatched a plan
To destroy...

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Jock stumbled - pals called him a wus
(No injury was obvious)
But Jock bruised his willy
And now he feels silly
With todger strapped up in a truss 


WRITTEN BY JAN ALLISON

Old Jock had injured and bruised his...

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No objection to cold weather, but...
ah jest wanna boomerang back into the womb

No matter birth canal
long since got breached,
countless scores of years
I quickly grew
impossible mission to plunge
(think Nestea commercial)
headfirst back into utero,
haint got any got...

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It’s Faint Paddies Day
everyday,
from my oxy scarce commuter view

At this Rocky Mountain skin altitude,
death is always on the dispatch menu

Faint Paddies 
be sweating onion fear on a ghetto roll
Cry babies
be diaper blues potty wailing —...

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Once, inside o' an Irish family's Derrygoolin farmhouse in the 1940s,
A boy named Anthony heard the woman whose word is death, himself, foreseen.

When the reaper's cloak appears to those who choke,
And his cowl upon ye'...

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The archers’ line was straddled,
By many a shapely calf.
The Marshall called the nocking,
And winked at the pretty lass.

The Maiden drew the bowstring back,
To her ruddy cheek,
As she fired her fledgling flights;
They heard the fair Maid...

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In a small grassy field
With the trees all around
There's a fairy ring ancient and old
And at times you can hear
Perfect echoes of sound --
'Tis the music of ages untold

For the crickets keep time
To a waltz...

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A March unstable, April drizzles
At last, now dawns the month of May........

Children gather 'round a table
Making paste of flour, water, 
guidance from a loving mother
with pictures drawn in rainbow colors 

Pretty paper doilies landed
In the...

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I'm a 'Renaissance Man' though 'Times' honor the specialist,
Money (and sex) get bestowed on male drones who have narrowest
Focus of all! Do lads cultivate 'Fall' when frails graze in the mall?
Might space aliens see when...

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" Sailor's Glee "

Now comes ol' sailor a'full o'glee
Down town wharf to set a'sea
Stumbled tripped he so did
Lost to him his dozen quid!

Down dark mole into wake
O'merry sloop set sail did make
Booty lost such thus...

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O'er the undulating prairie where grows soy beans and corn,
Generations of premier basketball players have been born.
The Hoosier State of Indiana, where budding talent is so replete,
Where small towns can conquer titans, shocking them in...

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Song of Saint Patrick

I
Introduction

Ye laddies and ye lassies, 
	Please bear my words a while,
		(I hope my thoughts, you'll hear them out,
 	That against me ye won't rile):
			What is it that yer drinkin' fer,
				The reason won't...

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PARENTAL ILLS

Fresh fallacy fall flat
Betwixt blenched beaux
Oldies goldies, modern crime
Lacerated denims, newish culture
Conventional crews, forgotten taws
Dearie draws near, dressed chamber
Old tent, increasing wails
Baggy laps, incessant sounds
Daunted, flabbergasted grips
Pleasurable, gratifying tips
Floppy fathers left in tears
Flooey spinsters...

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Leftover wine

Once, you and I, we tried to catch the wind. Once, you and I, tried to touch the clouds. We marvel at our world and we danced freely with the wildflowers and the dancing...

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Fisherman’s cap stained and tattered from days of a different time Smelling the sights and sounds of a sometimes troubled mind, neon lights swirling and music softly plays
it’s Monday night, open mic, and the relic...

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where frozen embers still burn
my doctor says is a thing you earn
i ask him if it is a large mass
as he quietly looks up my ass

i politely tell him it is on this side not...

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