Long Lassies Poems

My dog's as smart as a geek.
He can bark in English, Arabic, and Greek.
He’s expert in canine mathematics,
can discuss dog-fight aerodynamics,
and is fluent in bow-wow doublespeak.
And yours?

Would it be okay if later today
I brought Bixby...

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This selection of Christmas carols, in themselves, has little value as songs or poems.  Their importance lies chiefly as a historical footnote, as some scholars believe they may have been works written by history’s...

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Inspired by the painting "Highland Lassie" (1871) by Thomas Faed.

(Verse One; In introduction to Cailin)
Walkin' on the highways, searchin' down the byways,
Tromps a lonely figure on the Highland roads;
Peerin' from the Highdown, breezin' through the...

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BROKEN DOWN ANGELS

It disny seem that long ago
Toddling and having fun,
Crawling then walking along the floor 
And learning how tae run.

Potty trained and full eh life
They’d run you af yer feet,
A kiss on the cheek...

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(or swing sets and monkey bars)

A pitch perfect spring day
such as today April 8th, 2022
within quaint hamlet 
of Schwenksville, Pennsylvania
in close proximity within mind's eye
to Lake Wobegon, Minnesota
finds me reminiscing...

When, scads of light years ago
(half...

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The end to our sixteen years love affair
he didn't even try to hold on to my love
did I ever mean anything after that single wedding day
was this just your easiest way to be free of...

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Checked by www.howmanysyllables.com...

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Once upon a time in the lands from the north, south, east to west    
Navigating on the cold white sands formed of sugar and ice       ...

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Eighteen hundred and three begins U.S. destinies.
Merriwether Lewis and his comrade, William Clark, agrees –
They will go forth, avoid Frenchmen, fighting growling grizzlies.
To find a water trade route that flows west to the Pacific seas.
Louis...

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No objection to cold weather, but...

ah jest wanna boomerang 
back into the womb
versus being threatened 
courtesy beastie boy gang
beating me to a pulp 
after accurately discerning 
being scared less pang
suddenly imagining myself 
buffered, and buttressed...

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Take 1:
Too much beauty is a problem,
So the pretty women say,
Many women can be threatened,
Mood swings like a pendulum
Never trusting in ‘fair play.’

So it hurts when they dismiss you
Best to not give you a chance,
You...

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Butter Girl
Hey butter girl! You’re barmy in here there.
By that; in my pretty, little brown-heart;
Black boy’s heart. Or brown if you will!

Succumbed by taunting heat, how come you’re taunt ?
If you could do as much...

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No objection to cold weather, but...

ah jest wanna boomerang back into the womb
to escape unrelenting forbidding gloom.
perhaps cuz mine generation 
nsync with baby boom.

No matter birth canal
long since got breached,
countless (three plus) scores of years
I...

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Job; a man of many troubles 
For a few months in his life
Endured much pain and sorrow
Even great loss of life

He was the richest man
That then the world had known
But Satan hatched a plan
To destroy...

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Jock stumbled - pals called him a wus
(No injury was obvious)
But Jock bruised his willy
And now he feels silly
With todger strapped up in a truss 


WRITTEN BY JAN ALLISON

Old Jock had injured and bruised his...

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No objection to cold weather, but...
ah jest wanna boomerang back into the womb

No matter birth canal
long since got breached,
countless scores of years
I quickly grew
impossible mission to plunge
(think Nestea commercial)
headfirst back into utero,
haint got any got...

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It’s Faint Paddies Day
everyday,
from my oxy scarce commuter view

At this Rocky Mountain skin altitude,
death is always on the dispatch menu

Faint Paddies 
be sweating onion fear on a ghetto roll
Cry babies
be diaper blues potty wailing —...

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Once, inside o' an Irish family's Derrygoolin farmhouse in the 1940s,
A boy named Anthony heard the woman whose word is death, himself, foreseen.

When the reaper's cloak appears to those who choke,
And his cowl upon ye'...

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The archers’ line was straddled,
By many a shapely calf.
The Marshall called the nocking,
And winked at the pretty lass.

The Maiden drew the bowstring back,
To her ruddy cheek,
As she fired her fledgling flights;
They heard the fair Maid...

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In a small grassy field
With the trees all around
There's a fairy ring ancient and old
And at times you can hear
Perfect echoes of sound --
'Tis the music of ages untold

For the crickets keep time
To a waltz...

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Ladies and gentlemen, laddies, lassies one and all
Water, water everywhere, be careful lest you fall.
Please take into account, we've found wet boards do shrink
and remind your children,  this water's not to drink. 

WHY, ye...

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Enrolling as a pirate is much harder than it seems,
You’ll need to speak in present tense and chase your wildest dreams. 
Well, once you’ve trained a parrot and been measured for your hook,
You have to...

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A March unstable, April drizzles
At last, now dawns the month of May........

Children gather 'round a table
Making paste of flour, water, 
guidance from a loving mother
with pictures drawn in rainbow colors 

Pretty paper doilies landed
In the...

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I'm a 'Renaissance Man' though 'Times' honor the specialist,
Money (and sex) get bestowed on male drones who have narrowest
Focus of all! Do lads cultivate 'Fall' when frails graze in the mall?
Might space aliens see when...

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" Sailor's Glee "

Now comes ol' sailor a'full o'glee
Down town wharf to set a'sea
Stumbled tripped he so did
Lost to him his dozen quid!

Down dark mole into wake
O'merry sloop set sail did make
Booty lost such thus...

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