Long Flabby Poems

A Stolen Memory
A Mirthful Chorus
By Sy Roth 


We surrounded him 
Asked to let go.
She stared at the misshapen face,
Unshaven sandpapery skin 
Eyelids a tabula rasa
Fluttery sere skin
And we could see the humor blossoming in his...

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Colin is a cabby with a proper taxi cab
He drives for all the passengers an Uber didn’t grab
Which means he has a lot of time to kill most every day
And lots of evil folk to...

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from state dinner pent-up flatulence

                              ...

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LIGHT VERSE AND NONSENSE VERSE VI

On the Horns of a Dilemma (I)
by Michael R. Burch

Love has become preposterous
for the over-endowed rhinoceros:
when he meets the right miss
how the hell can he kiss
when his horn deforms her...

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Written: January 08, 2024
              ________________________________________

Thin walls allow us to hear whispers
"..you are enough...."
everything fall 
      and  ...

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The mirror reflects a lifetime etched upon my skin; a canvas of stories whispered through maturity. I stand before it, middle-aged and exposed, my nakedness laid bare. My image holds no judgment, only truth—an unyielding...

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A preconception in my mind
Of a nudist beach in the sun
Men of pervy persuasion 
Roam the sands 
Eyes behind dark glasses
Men with their dangly bits 
A display of exhibitionism?
A desire to be seen?
A legalised flasher...

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this is your life the clock is ticking, 
take those shackles off, 
meet yourself within, 

many wives tossed aside, 
after twenty or thirty years...
it happens...and it happens 
everywhere... 

rebuild yourself, 
yes if needed be, without...

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Learning to Love Myself

Slowly, very slowly, am I coming to terms with how I look
My double-chinned face, my flabby arms, my stomach.
I think to myself that these are things I shouldn’t be allowed to have
because...

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Mosque cowed covenant I keep Putin off...

and withheld broadcasting
the following communication
tucked away these many years,
when president number forty five
donned, jump/kick started, and tweeted
thru his musky, albeit flabby mantle,
a rallying cry forewarning onset of Mag(m)a
bubbling, gurgling,...

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Girl, Who lied to you?
Who told you that being you just won't do?
Who told you that your flabby thighs and your big brown eyes were uncouth?
Who told you that you weren't pretty enough and that...

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when another (anointed as lady lucky) 
 resident renter bequeathed her bed  
prior to that good samaritan deed thyself and spouse 
   slept on the floor like dogs dead
tired from another day...

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hostile,
pungent,
nasty,
&
redefining the art of having a
chip on his shoulder
he marches through the last specks of his burnt out existence
telling us all how we should live our lives
(spouting his rotting “wisdom” at everyone he sees)
while
regretting
so very...

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Marriage to alarmingly ballooning...

dramatically expanding spouse,
when adorning buttons 
pop off undersized blouse
which spurs yours truly to grouse,
and ruffle mine tail feathers 
while listening to Scheherazade.

Eats her weigh out of home and house
unsolicited feedback courtesy
quite doubtful,...

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Me and the missus live in decent
sturdy accommodations (formerly 
Schwenksville Elementary School
ofttimes referred to as prison,
and manager as the de facto warden),
albeit not so shabby nor chic low income 
quite modest (rather unmatchable cost wise)...

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I Cannot Weight To Hmm...
Be Pressed By A Dumbbell

Two fifteen pound
     steely danse sing
     wrought iron dumbbells
     ill-tempered, impatiently,
    ...

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One day, watching a reddened evening sky 
over the western horizon, it’s peculiar though, 
a thought that is so preposterous suddenly came to my mind
and that was the earth is not revolving. Is it because...

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Marriage to alarmingly ballooning...
dramatically expanding spouse

Eats her weigh out of home and house
unsolicited feedback courtesy
yours truly, she does grouse
quite doubtful, she could pose
for playboy and/or penthouse
returning explicit volley
of trailing appellations lobbed

expletive laced epithets
directed at her...

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In the very warm May' afternoon,
I decided to take a stroll instead of being blue,
and getting a little adventurous was to discover
another pansy or violet bloom;
these flowers were the precious gifts of a little and...

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Lying by my back weeping for you.
Memories of our happiest flashed by.
Compelling me to ask, why would you ruin us like this.
I gave every inch of my fat self to you 
I said, this is...

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Written: February 25, 2024

                ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A sun sets in the west; oh, boy, he has gone to rest,
Mama grips her breast...

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My Christmas Box by Rob Barratt

We’ll have an X-Men, X-files, X-Box, no socks, X-Factor, Max Factor, Max Bygraves, no war 
graves of a Christmas

I want empathy, an MP3, a hemp-free, hump-free, grump-free,  Humperdink, have-a...

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In ye old days of yore on Malaga's dreary shore
An untidy castle rimmed by salty moor
Housed a lonely, oft-drunk matador
In briny marsh grazed no sheep, but wild pigs three score
Staggering oft around soggy, muddy estate...

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My wife and I discussed each other,
as if we’re mirrors talking back,
and home truths kind of struck a chord
about some body parts gone slack.
I never thought about my double chin,
and what my stomach had become...

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Tasteless


Food is ugly, words are false;
Finish your plate or else!
Starving hungry with eyes that cannot see;
Understand, I just don’t want to eat.


Never been a vegetarian;
Bacon is too good at being the best meat.
Open fridge to...

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