Marriage To Alarmingly Ballooning

Marriage to alarmingly ballooning... dramatically expanding spouse Eats her weigh out of home and house unsolicited feedback courtesy yours truly, she does grouse quite doubtful, she could pose for playboy and/or penthouse returning explicit volley of trailing appellations lobbed expletive laced epithets directed at her husband the louse in lame retaliation deftly sparring as he doth rouse himself out of his vittle catatonic state thus muenster ring cheeses crust squeaks (me) meek Mickey Mouse. When I did pledge troth after courtship she would not abate aboot two dozen years ago (spoiler alert) wheezing heterosexually straight half heartedly accepting her asthma wife sne... snee...sneezing mate even then, she exhibited appetite for consumption defying four foot eleven petite size and lightweight. Now, she eats non stop round the clock stationing, lumbering, burgeoning girth casting dock shadows analogous to edge of night donning humongous frock to allow growing room for extra buttock vacuuming any/all comestibles in sight downing, emptying, gulping refrigerator contents chock a block nearly suctioning him, who doth tongue in cheek mock think apple pie, yet for grace of dog ad hoc anchoring spindleshanks laughingstock skinny chicken legs (mine) with knees that knock worse than concentration camp victim, (this gentile Jewish atheist gently pock king fun without intent to rock the casbah, nor ethnically clash mainly innocent poetic schlock), nonetheless chicken legs repurposed to anchor lock stock and barrel Matthew Scott madly flapping wings imitating flock of seagulls to no avail his flabby baby boomer body, mum mama followed dietary strictures touted by the late Doctor Benjamin McLane Spock, no matter, I got hoovered into maw of tee misses, who instantaneously spit out awful poppycock.