Home » Poems » Nobuntu Ntobela » I, Goddess

I, Goddess

Lying by my back weeping for you.
Memories of our happiest flashed by.
Compelling me to ask, why would you ruin us like this.
I gave every inch of my fat self to you 
I said, this is your body and you laid there marvelling at it.
You worshipped every piece of me 
These two tummies were your holy grail
My flabby arms your holy cross 
My thunder thighs your threshold.
My stretch marks your engraved holy message
You’d run your fingers through, studying them,
Staring at them like they’ll give you an answer 
of why you’re devoted to thee.

I laid there in my goddess form, thinking 
I’m just gonna provide my peasant with whatever
Pleases them and they’ll never serve another

From the kitchen to the bedroom I performed my miracles
You cried out to me and I heeded your cries, I gave you all ,
your heart desires, all I could conjure up inside me,
I gave it all to you in the name of love,
I  searched every cave of my inner being  
And collected even the last of my treasures and gave them to you.

I said, as long as my servant is happy
Yet you went your way and served another 
You broke our covenant and slept at the feet of false idols
Indulging in their wicked ways, they enticed you with their filth
There you were a sheep for slaughter ready to appease to them
You enjoyed them more than me, I had to anoint my body with new oils 
Smear myself with new fragments to attract your attention 
Everyday I changed colors for you but you spitted on me.
Tell me man, what have they sacrificed for you 
That you sacrificed your place in my heart
Should I carve myself thinner?
Then you’d remember who’s to rightfully worship. 

How could I stoop so low as to serve you mere man
I’ll let it slide this time but I’ll continue giving my all
Till I find a servant who’s worthy of this goodness.

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