Long Bun in the oven Poems

Two weeks passed before 
Dolly called Her twin. "Hey 
Girl I'm  coming to see you in a 
Little while."  "Ok, sis at about
What time?" Molly inquired.
"About an hour and a half 
Actually it's...

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Harriet Harris circa November 13th, 1935 - ~ May 4th, 2005

untimely death sentence ordained 
approximately six months prior 
to mother dearest celebrating 
her seventieth birthday,
though the last three years of her life
impacted courtesy hysterectomy
to remove...

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Emotional fatigue courtesy exhaustive vituperative harangue...

Lobbed and unleashed upon the heads
of (yours truly and the missus)
so called selfish "monsters."

The evening of Wednesday April 19th
witnessed us (birth parents of our first born)
weathering blistering telephonic brickbats.

She (unnamed...

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Harriet Harris née Kuritsky circa November 13th, 
1935 - ~ May 4th, 2005
(untimely death sentence ordained ~ early February 1935)

I trot out a poem acknowledging birthday
of dear ole mom, who succumbed, 
lost lease on life
nearly...

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The Bachelor Spectacular
by Michael R. Burch

One heart? Tossed aside.
The other? A bride’s.
In all his great wisdom, the bachelor decides.

Eeenie, mean-ie, mine-y, mo’,
one gal must stay and one must go.
If she hollers? That’s the show!

No heart...

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Harriet Harris circa November 13th, 1935 - ~ May 4th, 2005
(untimely death sentence ordained ~ early February 1935)

Test teasing prophylactics embarrassing
purchase never made at local drugstore
unsurprisingly, obviously, invariably...
birth control taboo subject, best to ignore
subsequently intercourse...

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Upon our (yours truly and his missus) exchanging holy matrimony vows

Ultrasound allowed, enabled
and provided obstetrician to zoom,
image courtesy sonogram
showing fledgling fetus,
thus we pledged our troth after spouses' womb
(approximately halfway
between her pregnancy) did balloon
uterus, wherein conception
delineated...

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Once thy future spouse (Abby Zison) found herself in the family way
  (with what would turn out to be the first of our two daughters – i do say
  determined and sealed the...

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There's a battle for your mind but you say it's just fine
 pulling a 9 to your head it's the walking dead
 Not since the day of creation did we stand with ovation
 A seed...

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When King David's men went out to fight,
 he stayed back home to spend the night.
He stepped out on the rooftop in the evening air,
 when a bathing beauty caught his stare.

So King David inquired...

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Jack and Jill went up the hill

This was never in dispute

It was how Jack fell down

With severe lacerations to his crown

That the jury had to conclude

Jill had a bun in the oven

The news was all...

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Smooth Operator
it was late in the evening & on the street
had my body kit waxed on my Camry
fenders had a slasp of silver so did the rims
stero was blasting to my favorite song
Like Michael Jackson...

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Trainspotting 
isn’t fun 
not when she’s dead tired 
arms of jelly 
ears full of tears 
	baby wants 
	baby wants 
pick the kids up 
from school
strawberry jam 
sandwiches uneaten 
traffic jam 
	ma I’m hungry 
	baby wants...

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WIFE AND MOTHER

 
Dearly Departed Sweetheart, and husband.
Some serious time I put in when I said " I do "-I kept true to the vows, but not to myself.
you have long been sick of me,...

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Dearly Departed Sweetheart,and husband.
Serious time I put in, when I said " I do "-I kept true to the vows, but not to myself.
you have long been sick of me, and I hated I had...

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I'm on fire busting out from the flames used to be a city kid in the hood
pulling my own like a dog without its bone you got me thinking alone
vibrations to the temptations through the...

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Food Fun. 
The Cook she fancied Chef.
She truly loved his meatballs
and as for his spotted dick. Sublime.

Chef he fancied Cook.
He really loved her chicken breasts
and wished one day to cover them
in a thick cream sauce.

Cook...

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Call It Anything But What It Is

By Elton Camp

In talking or writing, it’s become illicit
To use a plain term if it is too explicit
“Adult entertainment” is better than porn
A “bun in the oven” if baby’s...

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I once dated a chef …
I was worried about getting a bun in the oven
But when I saw him mincing across the kitchen
I knew I wouldn’t be getting my fingers burned!

I once dated a fireman…
Oh...

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I’s got six kids
Six mongrel dogs 
Living in one bed broken down shack
From six whisky drinkin’ hogs
And a v8, v8 Cadillac parked out back

Yes I have six children 
Nine months apart
Gots to buy six dozen...

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1, Battle of the Sexes : Fought over century's yet man's banner is wisest flown  white.  
2,Equal rights: Doors open wide and seats given up a man's place is behind or just stood...

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