Long Barker Poems

God's Return Ticket

Did you ever wonder about the Almighty’s criteria or selection process for reincarnation of souls back on Earth? Just think some famous politician, movie star, sports figure,criminal, dictator, and so on could use...

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I have to admit
The school where I work
Needs everyone to be
Able to speak Spanish.
Because the parents do.
We are an 82 percent
Spanish-speaking community.
I’ve taken Spanish 4 times.
And I have failed Spanish 4 times.
I have no idea...

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Stricken with anguished nausea

Written three years ago tomorrow, 
yet superimposed (likened to 
emotional palimpsest) upon 
mental state of yore
recent post traumatic stress 
triggered courtesy war
torn legally tendered greenbacks, 
where enemy bonded, heisted, and netted 
mine...

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To manipulate laws to disqualify voters,
Vote multiple times, or give dead living voice,
These are acts of a traitor! Man’s born with a choice.
Should political virtue be building consensus,
To hate when you don't win a kind...

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each of us gives in from a faithful friend,
Watch through the beaten tower
We give in way to soon...
This Newest piece, "The utmost for his highest."

covers all known bases to fuel the fan in
look deeper in...

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Zenith University   

I am a proud graduate  
of Zenith University,  
where the quality stays on  
until the little dot  
shrinks and goes away.  

I attended that fine institution  
with Tom and Jerry,  
Heckl, Jeckl, Mickey, Minnie,  
Da?y, Donald, Daisy,  
Huey, Dewey, Louie,  
Speedy, Wile E., Gumby, Pokey,  
Yogi, Boo Boo, Dino, Chucko,  
Hobo Kelley, Lassie, Bozo,  
Betty, Barney, Bam Bam Rubble, 
Wilma, Pebbles, Fred,  
Casper, Felix, Sheri? John,  
Gentle Ben, and Mr. Ed.     

Astro, Elroy,  
Judy, George, and Jane--  
Eddie Haskell, Wally Cleaver,  
Mom and Dad and Little Beaver.    

Favorite Martian--Flying Nun,  
James Arness--smoking gun, 
Spanky and Alfalfa,  
Larry, Moe, and Curly.

Tests consisted   
of posted patterns.
To see those,  
you had to get up early  
like Jack LaLanne and Buns of Steel, 
Captain Kangaroo.  

Mid-morning classes included  
Monte Hall (quite a deal), 
Bob the Barker (not the builder). 

Allen Ludden passed the words, ...

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“Elawishus Barker is the meanest man in Georgia. Absolutely cold as ice…and hard as nails t’ boot.
I’ve actually never met the guy, but - based on what I’ve heard - everyone in Pinkerton despises that...

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Over the years there have been many game shows and some are standouts.
With sport things like baseball, football, basketball, golf, it a good combination.
The game shows of the 50's staples on the game show channels.
Have...

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Wynken Blynken and Nod???
(ah...oh methinks this pissant pooch woof lee 
barked up the wrong tree – 
reed don my mongrel friend)

This poetic endeavor doth not boast nor brag
to take digs on front page
  ...

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Now, ol’ Twister Tom he was quite a cowboy find—
A real rock hard cowpoke, though the question begged—
Some say that he was a legend in his own mind,
He’d a been six foot six if he...

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It’s a hot commodity,
seems as if everybody gotta have it
Possessing something
that gives such elevated status
	is a coveted thing
Desired for the inordinate attention it bring
Ownership of something
that raises the personal profile
		to such gaudy heights
	is a top...

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Though not really that old, living piece of my face cut away,
Tissue sacrificed hoping that Basil cell cancer is cleared
Never much for the beach scene, a tan has just lost its appeal
And those chemical skin...

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Peel back the onion tear squeals
coming from a televised live politico lynch rally
See the sound byte rubber duckie
teflon touting 
his favorite effigy combustible hits

Penguin strutting presidential seal
got a billy goat attitude, kicking rude gutter alley
A...

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Michael was run over by a bus when he was just fifteen, 
He played football for Everton’s junior or youth squad, 
But suffered an acquired brain injury, a fractured skull, 
Which gave him mild Cerebral...

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Life's a carnival ride, a bag of barkers and crabs
pinching the mind with pink toys and shiny swag
stuffing your mind with sweet soft fuzzy things
wraps you in heavy chains and a cold nose ring,
leads you...

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Still in 75 The Red Devil

Wayne was in the boot of the white holden, mine
Mildred was a driving into a drive in movie fine
The car it lurched and wobbled Kangarooed just a bit
The wheel brace...

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(A Carnival Barker)
There’s no shame in my game,
I write to entertain
This is from my upcoming book 
that has no name.
Poetry that entertains.
 
I am the halftime show 
always ready to go...
A delightful distraction,
sharing that verbal...

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Clink-clink
Black panther eyes peering 
thru the concrete canopy
What do they see in the blood-smoke midnight air ... 
safari sound waves shocking,
moving the ghetto leaves
What do the tree leopard tar-pitch, onyx ears hear ... 
a white...

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Turn off your youthlight
and say farewell to the child
embrace the gist of it
WE ARE NO LONGER FUN AND WILD
Face the fact 
accept the fear
Examine thy cracks
between the front and the rear
Fun is no more
OLD AGE...

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To
cheat
on you
 would be like taking your mona lisa heart, and punching a hole right through
the canvas

You
who,
lifted
my
titanic anchored
soul
from
its
resting grounds

You
whose
cheeks shone
like
a
beacon
at the end of the
never ending
Blue Ghost Tunnel
The icy wind
crept
up
my
spine
Hauntingly beautiful
like
Picasso's Painting..........Old man with the guitar
but...

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Grammar Series
PRONOUN HOEDOWN

Grab your partner he or she
I'll choose you and you choose me

We'll go left if you go right
They'll keep going all through the night

In this here hoedown we use pronouns
We'll all git around...

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Piddle Eee Dee

Dribble, Dribble, breakage, and Piddle
                   A pox on that little dog!
Ankle biter, obnoxious barker…
 ...

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Notoriously eager to learn something unique, clever, exciting or new 
Enthusiasm parades out of her in every direction, heading toward jazzy 
We do not attempt to hold her back, for she cannot be tethered 

Being...

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Vembadi, my Alma Mater


On day one, I stepped into school tearfully,
In school uniform, clutching my bag nervously.
Miss Barker appeared! I gazed  at her fearfully,
Her foreign face scared the native lass tremendously!

Miss Barker, the disciplinarian,...

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In crowds bigly
And comparatively small 
The Barker 
Shot poisoned grammar arrows 
At apple pie heads 
Crowds roared with baked smiles
At milestones tossed 
Across potomac alters
The Barker 
Injected his virus
With mucus spray; tanned 
With ease, aimed...

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