We’ll Ride a Horse Down Rocky Path
We’ll ride a horse down rocky path
Fall in love in the aftermath
Well do-si-do and do it right
Me and honey can dance all night
Roll away to a half sashay
‘neath the moon’s where we’re apt to stay
We promenade around fig leaves
with rolled up jeans and shorter sleeves
Hanging out in the doghouse tree
I circle left and she don’t leave me
Promenade with a giddyup
Be home in time for kiss-make-up.
Allemande left as we make things right.
all things beautiful, all things bright.
Weave the ring, a forever link
All ‘lone till life turns blue and pink
Don't let what I say go to your head
But you're quite an animal in bed
He knew his wife had lied
It's what wounded his pride
So he slept in the doghouse instead
She put her cowboy boots on first and then her make up
Sniffing her ample posterior was her wiener dog Mup.
His brother Max looked interested from the cozy chair.
But if he left his cushion, Mup would be there.
She put lipstick and powder on her pretty face.
She is one of their besties, corpulent woman, Grace.
Her husband asked “why did you put your boots on first?”
She gave him a look that was one of her worst.
I mean, you are in your pajamas right? asked old Fred.
The dogs knew this was a mistake. But neither said.
Don’t go there with her! She is wearing that to work.
Don’t be ridiculous, Grace said. Don’t be a jerk!
But those are your PJ’s right? Fred said again.
She flounced away as if he had committed a sin.
He looked at the dogs and said “I like you the best.”
He was now in the doghouse, as you could have guessed.
My little brother cut his hair on my watch
I decided to fix it, the best I could do.
He was squirming, it’s uneven, a job of botch.
Not my fault I told my mom, blame it on Hugh.
Hugh is three, mama said. I blame you, you, you.
That made me angry, now I am irritated with Hugh.
When a little bro cuts his hair, what’s a big brother to do?
I have to tell you, now we are both in the doghouse too.
The house, sailing on the boathouse, trains are in the roundhouse, I served jury duty in the courthouse. I played with dolls in the dollhouse, my husband is in the doghouse, I never want to visit the jailhouse, flowers filled the greenhouse.
Date Written:6/17/2021
Note: It has been a very, very long day/week and it shows
here.
Laugh a little.........
3 Place
Workshop: Adjectives Deleted Contest Judged 7/11/2021
Sponsored by: Jack Webster
He’s a brown dog conditioned
in chains.
He lives with a castrated desire.
His urges are groomed. To be
gentle, he
must be docile. His fangs sink
into the flesh in a red China
plate. He
sucks on a daydream. Fetters
are unfastened in the dark.
Yet he
can’t chase that street .
There’s an ID tag attached to
his neck.
Sincerity is a strain. Even a
Norway rat scratches his sleep.
He can
lunge, snarl, yap, and is proud
of his vigour. But all are transient
illusions. His
hind legs swell horribly. A vet
diagnoses an incurable fate.
Heart-worms of
despair spread in rapidly.
Master shuts gate on his face,
not paying
any gratuity. Wisdom eyes
open in his sultry brain.
Whining is
in vain before iron bars.
He deciphers nonsensical
side of
barking. Dropping past litter
in the doghouse, he limps
away through
experience like an ascetic.
First printed in The Literary Hatchet
Her husband in the doghouse, he called her by the wrong name during sex.
Date written and posted: 12/15/2018
Hey buddy, this pooch has got a bone to pick with you -
You’re in the doghouse and we need to talk this through.
So prick up your ears and hear me through to the end -
This language barrier needs some serious work, my friend!
You wonder why I sulk and have no time for tricks -
Well would you want to party if you’d had your manhood fixed?!
And then you tug my lead when I’m positioned by a tree-
Say, do I bring a stop watch every time you need a wee?
I bring your paper daily, wag my tail with affection
But do you thank me? No, you just rush to the sports section.
I don’t mean to hound you because I’m your biggest fan
But please don't take for granted your most faithful Doberman x
30/07/18
link 2 : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O83lmO1lNDc
Doberman Pinscher Contest:
We scratched and scrapped and piled it together,
thin as cobwebs, like molted bird feathers,
spread out on the frozen lawn,
a gossamer frosting in early dawn,
a meager, stingy December snow,
hardly enough to foster a glow
from the Christmas lights candycane twirled
about the evergreen swags softly whirled.
A new sled from Santa's gift giving
was mine to enhance childhood living!
Why he did not provide the blizzard--
(He could have called on the North Pole snow wizard!)
we just did not know,
but to work we would go
and make a snow ramp out in the yard
about as thick as a worn playing card.
The rest of the story is not hard to guess;
my dad's in the doghouse, my mom in distress.
That snow ramp was built quite poorly it seems,
engineered from child wishes and misguided dad dreams,
and though for a moment, I thought I would fly,
at least, sitting here, I still have an eye.
Copyright, December 5, 2017
Christmas Rhymes Contest
Kim Rodrigues, Sponsor
I’m in the doghouse now
I’m out singing with the cows
Well I made my baby mad
And I’m feeling rather sad
I’m in the doghouse now
I’m in the doghouse now
I’m in trouble and how
I went out on the town
And I acted like a clown
I’m in the doghouse now.
I’m in the doghouse now
She’s gonna put me to the plow
Well I was feeling pretty swell
Till they threw me in the jail
I’m in the doghouse now.
I’m in the doghouse now
I’m out singing with the cows
Well I made my baby mad
And I’m feeling rather sad
I’m in the doghouse now
Don in the Doghouse
By Elton Camp
Don had a wife who was easily offended
If her wishes weren’t immediately tended
In the doghouse his time was mainly spent
Since out of shape his wife was often bent
Poor Don finally decided that he’d give in
And he built himself a doghouse in the den
He even bought a coat of white canine hair
To put on whenever he had to live in there
Bowls of dog food he decided that he’d eat
When it was his wife wasn’t acting sweet
Ultimately it became Don’s permanent bed
Because she came to detest everything he said
Our War Dogs are heroes but they're treated so bad
They're "in the doghouse" which really is sad.
The unequaled loyalty which they provide
When their handlers are wounded, they stay by their side.
The Pentagon awards medals for our wounded vets
For which there are no objections, complaints, or regrets.
But what about “Fido”, has he not earned respect?
To give Him a medal - why do you guys object?
The U.S. War Dog Association should hang it's head
cause these dogs get wounded and also get dead!
Maybe some of it's members should take the dogs place
for just a few days - could they stand the pace?
Sure these are “just” dogs, but their life’s on the line.
They’re there to help protect your freedom and mine.
They say “Official Awards” only humans can win.
Are War Dogs “Unofficial”? If so it’s a sin!
They’re in a War Zone doing all they can do
So they should be able to earn medals too.
So “ Pentagon People” this case is open and shut
You’ll see it too, when you get your head out of your butt!
Upon this floor I sit,
huggin' the porcelain bowl;
My stomach's tied in knots,
Feels like I'm gonna blow!
I should'a used my head,
why didn't I ever think?
Instead I hung around,
to have another drink!
One led to another,
another led to more;
Next thing y'know
I was drownin' on the floor!
My buddy was a savior,
he drove me to my home;
Pickled down in agony,
I find myself alone!
My mouth's a watery mess,
the bathroom's in a spin;
Sweat pours from my brow,
right to my pointy chin!
Dear God, can you help me?!
I was such a fool;
Can you pull me through this?
please tell me what to do!
For some apparent reason,
God fails to show;
Now I'm on my own,
just thought I let you know!
Uh oh!!...Here it comes!!
Damn, that really hurt!!
I missed the bowl completely,
an' it's rollin' down my shirt!!
My head's all awhirl,
I'm passed out on my back;
What started out as dim,
is now completely black!
I wake up in the morning,
in a cramped lil' space;
Something wet and slobbery
just swept across my face!
Boy, don't I feel stupid,
like a caged lil' mouse;
Someone dragged me from our bathroom
and shoved me in the doghouse!!