There once was a mobster named Clyde
Called a Buick Electra his ride
Then an old man named Dom
Made a mighty pipe bomb
And Clyde died being Electrafried!
“Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.”
Gary Allen
I could be a good girl but that’s no fun
I’ll be Bonnie to your Clyde minus the gun
We’re going on a ride with the top down
The convertible or my shirt, with no frown
I’ll eat fudge and worry not about weight
Enjoying you too as much as cheese cake
It’s too cold to skinny dip in the lake
But we can enjoy the jacuzzi and celebrate
Maybe I will even break fashion rules
No panties no bra with costume jewels
And you will wear dark shades so cool
We will sing loudly to music like fools
We may not break the law per say
But we will bum rush the parade
Dancing and prancing on the stage
Enjoying the shock on Santa’s face
the new employee was a walking cartoon
opening his mouth proved he was a buffoon
would have seemed wiser if he could have kept quiet
said the weirdest things, thought he was a riot
we ran from the lunchroom as soon as we spied
the exaggerator, who made up things, and always lied.
Did we ever give him a chance? Yes some of us tried.
But he was a horror, this motor-mouth, Clyde.
the 1934 model 40 B Fordor deluxe sedan idled outside the gas station
Inside was Clyde Barrow, who was robbing the place
His moll, Bonnie Parker, sat inside the car, holding a shotgun
these notorious robbers were deemed “Robin hood figures”
This was the Great Depression; their crime spree teased imaginations
Stories and rumors followed them from Texas to Missouri
They took their gangster car to Oklahoma and New Mexico
Robbing gas stations, and small town banks
People liked watching them shoot things up and act wild
They were famous for their daring and their pizzazz
Bonnie was only twenty four when she died
Clyde was twenty-five, but they are remembered
and weirdly revered, even though they were gangsters
who terrorized people and small town bankers
they outsmarted the police for twenty-one months
their crime spree was a subject of books and a movie
which has continued their legacy; making them forever famous.
when I would have lied
was about Bonnie and Clyde
took us for a ride.
Plain pink plaid cat loves her mouse, this is easy to see.
He’s purple too, his name is Clyde McVey McVee.
Clyde heard them speaking. “they are talking about me!”
Plaid cat turned her head, and said “That’s old Lee.”
Lee gave a hearty wave to his oldest friend, P.P.P.
Give me a taste sometime, he said, rude as can be.
Don’t worry Plain Pink Plaid Cat said to Clyde McVey McVee.
If anyone is going to eat you up, it will probably be me.
Meet the happy couple
That's Hilda all in white
Barney's there beside her
Loves her with all his might
They're an interracial couple
No problem nowadays
Frowned on not too long ago
But today it's a-okay
Met at the local horse saloon
Frequented by the equine crowd
She was a pretty show horse
He was boisterous and loud
Pretty soon, she tamed him
Settled him down just fine
Any filly would be proud to say
That stud over there is mine
Soon, a couple of months go by
Hilda's expecting a son
The happy couple race around
High hoof-ing everyone
Had a colt, called him Clyde
So proud of their little guy
Running through peaceful pastures
Then off to the clouds they fly
You can see this happy couple at night
When you view the evening sky
The three stars south of Orion
Are Barney, Hilda and Clyde
Bonnie Parker was obsessed with fame.
She finally got it in the end, when her body was shown to the public.
Riddled with bullets.
I doubt that is what she was hoping for.
Clyde Barrow had kept them out of trouble for years
Thanks to his keen sixth sense, of where to go, and when to go.
His body was right there alongside the love of his life.
I imagine he had no idea his body would be displayed like that.
They were public enemies one and two for a while.
Their crime scenes were stair steps to each other.
Increasingly dangerous robberies occurred, as their confidence grew.
The public was totally infatuated with the robber lovers.
Perhaps this is why the G-men displayed their bodies for all to see.
Hoping to dissuade the next potential Bonnie and Clyde.
To this day there are books and movies written about them.
The public has a pathological fascination for this kind of thing.
No idea why.
Talking without ablation,
Smiles hitting like sedation,
Hearts filled with adoration,
Floating down a river of admiration,
Blushing red like mars,
No love as strong as ours,
Comfort like a blanket of stars,
Soothing relief from painful scars,
Fire between two souls combine;
Being the Bonnie to His Clyde
The crime
doesn't pay off
mostly...
But love
not discerns
enough,
instead
loves exceeding... !
Road stop
By cop
Perceived
Car weaved
Two Beers
Cop jeers
Slurs talk
Can't walk
Clyde weaved
And heaved
Ker splat
Fell flat
Clyde drunk
As skunk
Tests muffed
Handcuffed
To jail
No bail
Transport
To court
Demand
Remand
Severe
One year
Oh dear
No beer
Meet the happy couple
That's Hilda all in white
Barney's there beside her
Loves her with all his might
They're an interracial couple
No problem nowadays
Frowned on not too long ago
But today it's a-okay
Met at the local horse saloon
Frequented by the equine crowd
She was a pretty show horse
He was boisterous and loud
Pretty soon, she tamed him
Settled him down just fine
Any filly would be proud to say
That stud over there is mine
Soon, a couple of months go by
Hilda's expecting a son
The happy couple race around
High hoof-ing everyone
Had a colt, called him Clyde
So proud of their little guy
Running through peaceful pastures
Then off to the clouds they fly
You can see this happy couple at night
When you view the evening sky
The three stars south of Orion
Are Barney, Hilda and Clyde
Clyde O'Toole suffered a heap of bad luck
He was beaned with a wayward hockey puck
He was heard to swear
As it creased his hair
Unfortunately Clyde forgot to duck
Entry for Tania Kitchin's "Limerick Fun Poetry" Contest
(PS/31 August 2020)
Won No. 3 in the contest
I'll be your Bonnie and you be my Clyde
Trust and loyalty we always provide
Taking on the world always by your side
No secrets between us we’ve nothing to hide
Down for you and you for me our love is unique
One that stands throughout time as it’s epic
Us against the world is how it should be
Taken out our enemies in killing sprees
I’m your ride or die every single day
Untouchable, like Ness even when we play
You stimulate my body and my mind
Thief of love your the mastermind
I'm your Bonnie and your my Clyde
If a poison you'd be my cyanide
I curl up to you as you pull me closer
In your arms I’m the pistol your the holster
I'll be your Bonnie you'll be my Clyde
Trust and loyalty we always provide
Taking on the world always by your side
No secrets between us we’ve nothing to hide
Knock, knock, knock!
A lover at the door
The other adjust his clothes
The handle turns their hearts
Knock, knock, knock!
An officer at the door
An eye on the peephole
The handle breaks apart
Knock, knock, knock!
A lawyer at the door
A lover in a gaol
The other with a get out of jail free card
Knock, knock, knock!
A mother at the door
The mother eyed the Judas whore
All her necklace and bracelets she took back
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