Best Clyde Poems
They were bank robbers and their names were Bonnie and Clyde.
They robbed banks in six states until 1934 when they both died.
In addition to robbing banks, they also robbed stores and service stations.
They killed thirteen people, they were dangerous and caused devastation.
In 1933 the dangerous duo teamed up with Clyde's Sister-In-Law and her husband, Buck.
Clyde's brother was killed four months later and Bonnie and Clyde soon ran out of luck.
The next year they were driving on a road in Louisiana and they didn't know they were in danger.
They were ambushed and killed by a posse that was lead by a Texas Ranger.
The posse fired one hundred and sixty-seven rounds and Bonnie and Clyde were hit fifty times.
They were deadly murderers and thieves but they ended up paying for their dastardly crimes.
(This is a true story about Clyde Barrow and Bonnie Parker who were killed on May 23, 1934.)
Meet the happy couple
That's Hilda all in white
Barney's there beside her
Loves her with all his might
They're an interracial couple
No problem nowadays
Frowned on not too long ago
But today it's a-okay
Met at the local horse saloon
Frequented by the equine crowd
She was a pretty show horse
He was boisterous and loud
Pretty soon, she tamed him
Settled him down just fine
Any filly would be proud to say
That stud over there is mine
Soon, a couple of months go by
Hilda's expecting a son
The happy couple race around
High hoof-ing everyone
Had a colt, called him Clyde
So proud of their little guy
Running through peaceful pastures
Then off to the clouds they fly
You can see this happy couple at night
When you view the evening sky
The three stars south of Orion
Are Barney, Hilda and Clyde
To Bonnie:
If everything should fail, I’ll raise some hell until we make it right.
We’ll rob that bank and the motel even if it takes an all out gun fight!
I’ll walk through fire so you can have all you desire and more
I will not tire ‘till I hand you an empire and, so I’ve gone to rob that grocery store!
Girl, your my Queen and I’ll stand on life’s battlefield and fight to the death.
Hand-n-hand we will stand until we take our very last breath!
There’s nothing I wouldn’t do! Not a thing I wouldn’t give.
I would lay down my life for you just so you could live!
To avenge your death I would be rebirth; I’m serious as a heart attack!
I would follow you to the end of the earth and all the way back!
Baby I love you! Without you, there’s no me, and that’s how I feel inside.
No matter what we go through we will make history as “Bonnie and Clyde!
To Clyde:
No matter what I do, just to be with you, a life sentence? It’s worth it.
I’ll give up what I have, just a chance, let me grab, just a glimpse of your soul, together
We will grow old.
They question me, threaten me, constantly all over me, and want me to give us up,
Won’t let me go, relentlessly won’t let me be.
Little do they know, I ride for you, very least die for you,
You’re the love of my life, take the stand and vibe for you
Cold when I need to be, warm when you’re touching me,
Legalities by the wayside let the world watch and see
The ends of the earth is hardly far enough, let’s get lost somewhere together with all we
stacked, and that shouldn’t be tough
Just know how much I love you; I’ll gently take this all in stride
No matter what happens here, I’m still your Bonnie, and you’re my Clyde!
Note: A collaboration with Jillian M. Johnson
too snide
both died
Note A footle-2 lines,2 syllbles with a title-Light verse form,witty,pertinent,topical etc
(technically a trochaic monometer)hence I label the form as a footle best exampled by the
famous FLEAS
Adam
had'em.
My wife and I are in court and we're being tried.
She and I were the modern day Bonnie and Clyde.
But we didn't rob banks, we stole by identity theft.
When we got through, people had no money left.
She lied in court when she said that I put her up to it.
I can't even use a computer, it was that hag's idea to do it.
She turned on me so fast that it would make your head spin.
Now I'll spend twenty years in jail, my sex life has come to an end.
The jury just came back in and found both of us guilty.
My wife gave them the finger because they didn't set her free.
I'm so sexually frustrated that I feel like I'm going to bust.
You're looking at a man who is suffering because of his lust.
We were the modern day Bonnie and Clyde, our story must be told.
I'll reject my wife when we're released because she'll be too damn old.
Meet the happy couple
That's Hilda all in white
Barney's there beside her
Loves her with all his might
They're an interracial couple
No problem nowadays
Frowned on not too long ago
But today it's a-okay
Met at the local horse saloon
Frequented by the equine crowd
She was a pretty show horse
He was boisterous and loud
Pretty soon, she tamed him
Settled him down just fine
Any filly would be proud to say
That stud over there is mine
Soon, a couple of months go by
Hilda's expecting a son
The happy couple race around
High hoof-ing everyone
Had a colt, called him Clyde
So proud of their little guy
Running through peaceful pastures
Then off to the clouds they fly
You can see this happy couple at night
When you view the evening sky
The three stars south of Orion
Are Barney, Hilda and Clyde
© Jack Ellison 2015
There was once a village tailor named Clyde
Who was known for his misfits though he tried.
He altered trousers for Mort.
Mort said, "The inseam's too short!"
My! My! Mort, how you have grown!" Clyde replied!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
Copyright (All Rights Reserved)
For eighteen months Clyde had been overseas
Spouse wrote she was having twins, if you please
Nine months for each, he counted
Jibes by pals he discounted
With the gestation time he was at ease
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
A happy ending was never written about two villains
They’ve dug two graves for us
In the ground, we’ll rot until we disappear
Life is too short to keep living in fear
Stop fighting this my dear
I already told you our end is near
Can’t you see that it’s us against the demons we fight?
Bonnie and Clyde with guns strapped to our thighs
Red and blue sirens are calling our names
We won’t stop until this world is in flames
We’re fighting for our sanity while saving each other
Our dreams used to be in color but even there we now suffer
Hell is the only place we can be with each other
I hope you’ve said your goodbyes to your brothers and mother
Meet the happy couple
That's Hilda all in white
Barney's there beside her
Loves her with all his might
They're an interracial couple
No problem nowadays
Frowned on not too long ago
But today it's a-okay
Met at the local horse saloon
Frequented by the equine crowd
She was a pretty show horse
He was boisterous and loud
Pretty soon, she tamed him
Settled him down just fine
Any filly would be proud to say
That stud over there is mine
Soon, a couple of months go by
Hilda's expecting a son
The happy couple race around
High hoof-ing everyone
Had a colt, called him Clyde
So proud of their little guy
Running through peaceful pastures
Then off to the clouds, they fly
You can see this happy trio at night
When you view the evening sky
The three stars south of Orion
Are Barney, Hilda and Clyde
Knock, knock, knock!
A lover at the door
The other adjust his clothes
The handle turns their hearts
Knock, knock, knock!
An officer at the door
An eye on the peephole
The handle breaks apart
Knock, knock, knock!
A lawyer at the door
A lover in a gaol
The other with a get out of jail free card
Knock, knock, knock!
A mother at the door
The mother eyed the Judas whore
All her necklace and bracelets she took back
Clyde O'Toole suffered a heap of bad luck
He was beaned with a wayward hockey puck
He was heard to swear
As it creased his hair
Unfortunately Clyde forgot to duck
Entry for Tania Kitchin's "Limerick Fun Poetry" Contest
(PS/31 August 2020)
Won No. 3 in the contest
from Bonnie and Clyde
Bonnie did write poetry
not buried by Clyde
Haeckel and Clyde were twins, you see
Not one much like the other
Doreeane gave birth to both
But each was his own brother
One lives in a mansion
Overlooking grassy hills
The other in a bottle
With his doctors and his pills
In the bottle is a fortress
No one drives a car
Just a fortitude of solitude
And centuries of demar
In the grassy knolls, the lilies grow
The lilacs always bloom
Lyla walks on baby’s breath
A waking sweet perfume
In the bottle, war is raging
With the Hatfields and McMars
Clyde is courting Bonnie Parker
They’re out there stealing cars
In Haeckel’s halls, life is grand
The Dark Years will pass
Lyla did her nails and hair
Now she’s on her rass
Finesse and grace ain’t got no shoes
How do they keep from spilling the booze
McHaeli got his banjo back
How do you know when you got the blues
Clyde still haunts the back streets
Collecting vacant souls
He fills their minds with obfuscation
Stories full of holes
Please gather where they frolic
If you think you know
Which is Heackel and Jekyll
Which can Hyde from Clyde
by Joe Louis McMar
Meet the happy couple
That's Hilda all in white
Barney's there beside her
Loves her with all his might
They're an interracial couple
No problem nowadays
Frowned on not too long ago
But today it's a-okay
Met at the local horse saloon
Frequented by the equine crowd
She was a pretty show horse
He was boisterous and loud
Pretty soon, she tamed him
Settled him down just fine
Any filly would be proud to say
That stud over there is mine
Soon, a couple of months go by
Hilda's expecting a son
The happy couple race around
High hoof-ing everyone
Had a colt, called him Clyde
So proud of their little guy
Running through peaceful pastures
Then off to the clouds they fly
You can see this happy couple at night
When you view the evening sky
The three stars south of Orion
Are Barney, Hilda and Clyde
© Jack Ellison 2012