There’s an emptiness inside me
That makes me hollow
But takes up space.
It crushes me internally,
Takes away my hunger
And doesn’t let me breathe.
I have to force my lungs
To take in the air
Like I’m mouth-feeding my inner child.
But all I take in
Is pain
that keeps me empty.
But then I find you again.
I feel your presence,
Even though we don’t belong
To each-other anymore
And I feel the colors
of your soul,
Even tho you don’t want me
Around anymore.
And then You look at me
Like I have never held you
And You speak to me
Like I’ve never heard you sing
And that pain fills me
But at least I’m not hollow
Anymore.
This summer found men mortal
I’ll miss the better nature you find at the beach,
but goodness isn’t always a physical thing.
In the scene wherein we played,
—earlier this summer—
the sky was an azured theatre of taming heat
all colours seemingly washed too bright
and true to the ramping prophecies of science,
vital waterways shrank, and forests burned
with the devil’s own violence
Equal scales weigh though
both on the world’s beauty
and the miracles of men
though one’s a lower brand of perfection.
I know things of relative value when I see them, hold
and feel them, like the indisputable metric of gold
While nature has sand and majestic suns,
men, as sovereign masters of base elements
invented air conditioning, and Fruity Pebbles.
Should summer be invited back next year?
.
.
A song for this
the boys are back in town by thin lizzy
Two years ago, our story closed,
Yet you lingered in the margins.
Two months ago, in a darkened theatre,
You held my hand like a secret kept,
A love hidden from another love.
I thought it was a return,
But it was only a hiding place —
You wanted the comfort of my yesterday,
While promising someone else tomorrow.
Today, I no longer check the stars for us,
I check my own worth.
And it whispers back, clear and calm:
I deserve more than a love shown in the dark.
I deserve a love that can stand in the light.
Now I will never be dirt free
You've covered me head to toe
It's in my hair and in my mouth
Stuck like gum in the roots of my hair
A sour taste like a lemon or a not-yet-ripe strawberry
No matter how much I bathe
You’ve done the irreversible
The unforgivable
I am treated like a garden bed
Used in the spring and neglected in the winter
You use me to grow new things
like roses and fruits and berries
I hope everything you grow wilts rots away like the maggots that fill your sick mind and sick heart
You are an earth worm, but I am not your filth to consume
No matter how much you change
Now I will never be dirt free
She's all dolled up, looking cool and hot, that's better than she's used to
Out on the town looking around for a guy that's better than she's used to
Looking cute in her go-getter suit, wish she were mine loving like we used to...
I see her face in the middle of the night
I lay awake and wonder why
A love so strong could ever die
And I cry...
Repeat three verses
Repeat chorus
Copyright ©? Jeff W. Watson, August 5, 2026
And I’ll lie on concrete floors
Gathering strength
To climb onto silk sheets
Thinking about dropped beats
Fight off the sleep deprivation
To circle the block, check the house and the yard
And I think of your handwriting and the lines on your face and trace your back like a map to the place
Where it’s warm and it’s dry and it’s safe
Tucked away
Every day
And maybe there’s more than we’re given
But when I just sit criss cross and listen
I’m Mary, daughter, John on a mission
Knowing what I’m meant to
Feeling like He felt too
I ran into you last week
It felt like wearing wet socks
I would’ve asked to come home
Just to dry off
I want your carpet between my toes
And the door on lock
I’d thaw by your fireplace
You would make tea
We don’t have to talk
We could just blink
I’d leave before sundown, it wouldn’t get bleak
We don’t have to talk
We don’t have to speak
To all the Misters
Who thought me a sister
Who found me a bore
In which to abhor.
Who tolerated me in "loving" pursuit of something "else"
Than "love 'til death do us part" as chimes
The whimsical of chapel wedding bells:
I do apologize for having stayed so long
I wish you well, though I dismissed you "gone"
Please do know...from the depth of my soul
I wouldn't have stayed so very long
But, if I did over-welcome my stay., I'll just have you know
I only did embedding the simple thought deep in my soul
That YOU were suitable for me to build MY dream,
Fulfill my goals and visions - yet unforeseen
First thing's first: A "safe" haven is what you miss
All for YOUR exchange altar-trade - a dollar for a kiss....
The street life is miserable,
But somehow we romanticize.
Dreaming of making it out,
Reminiscing with the guys.
Some didn't make it,
Couldn't focus on the prize.
Others didn't see it
When it was right in front of their eyes.
Some chose death,
Others went to jails.
Ones that ain't make it out
Live in their own hell.
I finally saw the light,
The other side of life:
Great home, great kids,
And a great wife.
You prolly ain't know
But I bet you could of guessed it,
If love is a disease
I been infected.
Scared to tell you how I feel—
Fear I be rejected.
Gotta say something now
Cause my heart getting desperate.
Don't wanna search for the next,
Don't wanna fall back on my ex.
I know you got the message
But forgot to read the text.
Modest like a Toyota,
But to me you a lex.
We keep going back and forth in our minds
We tell ourselves we just need some time
The truth keeps staring us in the face
So we put up a hard fight to change our ways
What is it that we're afraid of losing
It's better if we let life do the choosing
Better safe than sorry is what most people say
Fighting because we don't want to regret it one day
We ignore the signs that screams it's time to let go
So we decide to take a break or to take things slow
It's hard to let go because of the fear of the unknown
Enduring each fight than the pain of being alone
Letting go would mean being alone with the memories
While asking ourselves why did we gave up so easily
Meditating over should of, could of, would of's
Not sure where holding on would have put us
We would eventually ruin ourselves keeping up this charade
So we need to let go and stop marching this parade.
I apologize for leading you on
I apologize for doing you wrong
I apologize for walking out
I apologize for leaving you alone
I apologize I had to go
I apologize I ain't coming back
I apologize this didn't work
I apologize your heart was broke
I apologize this may be my fault
I apologize it wasn't what you thought
I apologize I did you like your ex
I apologize for who ever comes next
I apologize I ain't give you more
I apologize you settled for less
I apologize you cant find better
I apologize if you ask me again I'll say never
Now I'm done apologizing this my last poem
If this was played to music I apologize would be the song
In the belly of my shoebox
The organ plays a sad song
Of scattered memories
Piped and full of wind
His last letter breaks my heart
There are his pictures side by side
And a voice that I still hear
Fifty years later, it still hurts
connie pachecho
5/12/26
As your memories fade,
I also want to shed
those moments from my mind
which I cannot regain.
Why do I hurt myself again?
Why to carry this pain?
If you cannot be mine,
then why should I confine
memories that only give me numb pain?
If you can live without me,
why should I not let those memories flee
to the unknown,
from where they can't find a way again on their own
and can't make a habitat in my mind again?
Tell me, if you are living happily without me,
why are your memories causing such pain?
Oh Almighty, hold me one more time,
give me strength.
Wipe away all those painful moments from my mind
that are causing strain.
If he cannot be mine,
then why should I carry such pain?
Inside,
the walls of a rotting
log cabin,
situated in the piney woods,
you lie situated on me, adorning my
neck with soft summer kissings.
While
I pull dandelion
fluff up and out of your
hair.
Cypselae,
that’s what the seeds
are called,
miniature fruits that grant
wishes.
As far as wishes go,
this is my greatest.
As far as fruit goes,
everyone knows what happened
to Eden.
Eve, I diminished our
love into atoms.
And the cabin lays rotting
there still.
He does not beg for love at first,
Just quiet respect, soft and true,
From gentle hands he calls his own,
A mother's grace, a lover's view.
Yet love, he learns, comes priced in deeds,
In all he gives, in all he bleeds.
He molds himself to fit her dreams,
For fleeting warmth, for borrowed light,
For love, he trades his truest self,
Becomes their "should," forgets his "might."
In silent wars he stands alone,
And calls her chaos still his home.
He bears her storms, her fragile fire,
Her shifting moods, her distant gaze.
Yet in return, a breaking truth,
Betrayal wrapped in fleeting praise.
For though we curse in shattered pain,
Both man and woman seek the same:
A soul to hold, a life to share.
It's not the gender that's wrong,
It's timing that lies.
So he still loves with deeper ache,
With restless fire, with endless plea,
For none are wrong, just lost in need.
Learn his silence, hear his cry,
For unloved hearts don't live... they die.
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