Best Undercarriage Poems

Oh boy, she was gorgeous and I made mention of bed
She said she really liked me but she won’t until we’re wed
She often said there’s stuff that really ought to be discussed
But I could only think of getting hitched to quench my lust

We did it,...

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The heart of a lion 
The soul of a flea
The energy of a gnat
Please do not let this be me

Reaching into my junk drawer
I pick up three items that give me glee
A candy bar wrapper, 
And a playing card with a decorated bee.

Dragons in my...

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Somewhere over Europe
A B-17 flies
Strafed and damaged
In her enemies skies

The flak has taken
Its toll on the plane
This crew so brave
In this theatre of war campaign

Many hours have passed
With no sight of the channel
Only land ahead
Is it our instrument panel

A shout is heard from the rear...

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I am a grossly overweight midget 
of later years.  

I have a penchant for funny women, 
the absurd, 
and baked goods.  

I have 826 thousand dollars in the bank 
and a dose of psoriasis. 

My personality is that of a freight train
with two,...

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Street-lights golden nuggets on a plane
I shimmer with anticipation
Aircraft dips left like a soaring hawk
Golden eyes zero in on its prey

Aloft and descending turbulence
Undercarriage open like talons
Binocular vision so alert
As screeching rubber thumps the tarmac

Decelerate adrenal glands pump
Undoing buckles my thoughts floating
About casual normality
Within casual...

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Leslie Holden came from East Adelaide a South Australia town 
When on 26 May 1915 he enlisted in the 4th Light Horse of the AIF renown
He was a driver when the 4th left for Egypt and the war 
Then volunteered for the Australian Flying Corps...

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I'm a big tree and a vast forest,
I shade the undercarriage,
I'm a kid slash florist.
I live to raid any broken marriage.

This is a stick up, give me the goods,
Wonder, get lost and stolen,
This is a trick yet you hide in the woods.
My technique must be...

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twelve miles of useless... road 
if you want to call it that
so washed out, rutted, and rocky that
usually you drive around it
three beers to go such a tiny distance
hay meadows across the creek 
always teaming with deer
so incredibly flat, those fields give you hope 
that...

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A cool breeze
    like the slightest graze
of the recently passed
flows under the shaded thickness
     of the ancient woods.
  The worn paths,
         sunken below
 the forest floor
   like...

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Consider the chance meeting of a man and a dog on the street.
The man smiles and smacks his lips – a calming signal to the dog.
The dog, head down, tail at half mast, wonders what this stranger wants.

The man asks if he may pet the...

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PAPER PLANE

A project with my small son
After so much paper folding
Sharpening important creases
Anticipation slowly increases
Thumb and forefinger holding
First flight testing has begun

He sees me throw the plane
Into the garden’s warm still air
At first it floats and then dives
A sense of freedom in our lives
What’s a...

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A sign in a Japanese hotel, “Please take advantage of our chambermaid”
Sounds like it could quite possibly involve touching her undercarriage
Steady down, friends
It's only pretend
But on leaving, you should thank her for allowing you backstage...

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A sign in a Japanese hotel. “You are invited to take advantage
of the chambermaid” sounds like it may involve her undercarriage
Steady down, friends
It's only pretend
But you may want to thank her for allowing you backstage...

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“Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate", most frequently translated as "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here". A. Dante, 14th century Italian poet

They sway the power over mere mortals
They drop the words that cannot be appealed
Gods of carjacks are deities, immortals
The voodoo magic over vehicles they...

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When brother was fading away
black chimes signaled for the demons to play
They attacked all sides of the hobbled mind
Treating the heart like an orphaned marble
They were rabid and had brackish intention
hope chipped away like crowbar on cement.

In a dream one of them took me into...

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