Best Screwed Poems

( Retrieved from an advertisement
                                   "Cleaners for Christmas" )


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1) Any form – I am usually not fond of prose
2) 10 line minimum, 50 Line Max
3) No Names
4) No poems from any of my previous contests
5) Poems uploaded to PS on 10.07.15 or earlier
6) Avoid Homophone errors *
7) Avoid Cliches *
8) Correct spelling *

1)Yeah,...

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Sex is physical
But love is non existent
So let's make believe...

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Screwed IX Contest
Sponsor: Rob Carmack


I walk beneath you, anticipated hands held tight,
I wanna be with you, quench my thirst tonight.

In the sunshine I seek comfort from your rays,
Shining without an end, as your tenderness I crave.

Through out humanity there is but one desire,
To bring you...

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To think I've been, in this soup
Probably a year
No matter how hard I write
I'm nowhere getting near
Rob I think I had it
And I'm really getting pissed
What the hell is going on
Why can't I make The List

There are a hundred poems
Wrote by just a few
It's always...

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Wreckage-Screwed X Contest

            Believing in you caused wreckage in me
               You thought taking your own life would fix you
 ...

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Once the wandering nomadic way found the traveler wound by that which freedom furled,
Within its weave of the will to sheathe the day as if it were a weapon to win the world.

When the nomad died, the king was born,
Breed beneath lumped rubble piled by...

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Mr.Mish got screwed on the fish
                                     He cried over...

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Horn Screwed Up Haiku

So when you screwed up;
Cannot think of what to do;
Blame it on system.

This is what I am starting to believe.
That is what Trump, Bernie and
European Common Market (ECM)
are doing.

Jim Horn

PS. Category is farewell to ECM.
And I thought ECM was supposed 
to be...

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The moment I first saw her
I knew my life had changed
The feel seems like forever
For this wild heart untamed

I can’t get her off my mind
Not even in my sleep
I am restless all the time
And gets harder to breathe

Every time I wake up
To an early daybreak
I...

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Why do I...We have such trouble speaking the words I...we need most to say
                        but when I...we try I...we just utter illiterate...

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Forsaken, mistaken. That is the way I am.
That's how it happened. I was left behind.
My brain flaking. Unaware of my mind.
I'm forever saddened. Bruising, I'm losing.
My soul as quick as could be. Advocation of truth, I try to send.
A left hand fashion statement. Realism that's...

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The court Judge is at my house
I cannot tell anyone, not even my spouse
He's come to inspect my claim
And I've only myself to blame
It never occurred to me when I sued
When I was in the foulest mood
I saw the damage in my new property on...

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I was born to be the dark horse...the underdog. 
But, I'm nowhere near endearing enough for people to root for me. 
Some look at me pitifully like I'm a blind puppy, others see me as a disease, and still others try to trip me to...

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A princess who prances about in the nude
Should realize that cameras she cannot elude.
So naturally, photos, exposed but not lewd,
Made headlines and numerous times have been viewed.

The prince and the princess have rightfully sued.
The cameras did not have a right to intrude;
For even the royals,...

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