Best Punter Poems

...Pulled on the parka, and turned my face to the cold street.
Half running, half slipping, piece of toast hangin' from my mouth..
man oh man am I late...

Two and half blocks south down Jerome to t......

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...Written: October 02, 2023 For Robert James Liguori Contest
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Fervent mishaps start life's biggest wins.
The first crocus shrieks ......

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..."It is neither wealth nor splendor; but tranquility and occupation which give you happiness". By Thomas Jefferson

A place where the zeal of my heart dw......

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...Your body men desire
It fills them full of fire
They want so much
To feel the touch
The gifts you have for hire.

You walk the streets so dark
Your future bleak and stark
You work for bugs
T......

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...(Victorian artist William Holman Hunt was
both attracted and repelled by his models)

Can we agree that, terrified of sex,
Hunt couldn’t help but hunt it, seek it out?
There doesn’t seem to be a......

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...A nice cruise from New York, I thought

From down by Pier two-one

I thought I'd head to England

For a good old spot of fun

An Ocean trip, some nice fresh air

Eleven days at sea

I tho......

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...Present, but not independent, 
Of societal flows, expectations, 
Not understanding sisterhood, 
Out with reachability and love. 

Together with a voice each, 
But screeching sometimes, 
In a s......

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...Cash makes the world go round, spin
Don't I look like money, that's my twin
Gettin' money, like it's going out of style
I keep throwing it up, like it's bile
Got cash all over me, like it's a rash
Yo......

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...Our internet freedoms
Say quotes?
Say Facebook pokes?
Say avatar Say hashtag,
My computer handbag?
Or smishing, dishing or instant phishing?

Our musical freedoms
Say princess of pop?
Say qu......

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...Never pass up a good cartoonity                                                                                                                                     This an encouraging stick about pun......

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...Red Rum was pounding the turf down at Aintree,
Going as fast as any horse can be,
Ginger was there looking on at the side,
And the whole of Liverpool, filled up with pride.

For the third time n......

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...I have a couple of internet Friends in Australia
We like to joke around some, so I wrote them this,
To the tune of "Talk To The Animals"  (Dr. Dolittle)


If I could talk to the Aussies
just imagine ......

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...Ballaraat’s known for its bounty of gold,
and the days of Eureka Stockade,
plus winning horses, on racing courses,
where flanks of the horses are flayed.

And the offer of prize is a bountiful o......

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...Standing near the front of the queue
The boy rehearses his lines
"Just three or four pints"
Over and over again in his head

Focussing on every step
That takes him to the inquisitor
Stray too ......

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...I’ve made some money,

But she’s made more.

Knock knock!

Another punter at the door.

I slip on my shoes,

Put my lipstick on.

This man is eager,

Again, comes a ‘ding dong’.

He p......

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