Best Nursery Rhymes Poems
Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes for adults?
One, two Buckle My Shoe
One, two, Got caught cheating on you
Three, four, we got a divorce
Five, six, how much do I get?
Seven, eight,I have a hot date
Nine, ten, Got married again!
Do Your Ears Hang Low?
Do your breasts hang low?
And not stay where they go?
When you lay down on your bed,
They social distance like covid!
Lost in the woods way out?
They're like a compass, pointing South.
Do your breasts hang low?
Ring Around the Rosy
Ring around the toilet
And you just ignore it
Some men are asses,
Put the seat down!
Little Miss Muffet
Little Miss Muffet
Joined a commune to rough it
Eating organic each day
Along came a spider
Who offered to hide her
If she'd be friends
and not run away
Baa, Baa Black Sheep
Baa,baa, black sheep
You think you are so cool
Being a rebel, skipping days of school
Once to go swimming, once to just hang out
In this family that's not what we're about
Baa,baa, black sheep
You think that you are cool?
No sir, no sir, you are just a fool.
Mary Had A Little Lamb
Mary had a little lamb
His fleece was white as snow
Because the Son of God,
No sin did he know.
He followed me to school one day
which was against the rules
They said we're not allowed to pray
Or speak of him at school
Why does the Lamb love me so?
And hear my every cry?
He loves everyone you know
And that is why He died.
My bedroom has a rug on the wood floor,
Many colorful squares are everywhere.
I made a tall blue tower up my door,
It went into the pretty orange air.
Building away from the Lego red bear,
Rusty the red bear wants to tickle me.
Up the tall blue tower I now must flee.
A tisket, a tasket
He peed in her basket
He stuck in his thumb
Is he ever dumb
She sat on a tuffet
Muffet couldn't 'rough it'
Jill went up the hill
Jack sure got a thrill
Peas porridge hot
Hits her sweet spot
The Prince put on her slipper
Then dove right into her
If you think this is too daring ~
Read what your grandkids are sharing
world poets’ nursery rhymes - kids’ dreamrockets at modern times
Mary had a little lamb
The birth was quite a sensation
It should go down in the history books
She needed a lot of sedation
Pinocchio had a very long nose
It grew when telling a lie
Geppetto couldn't keep it from growing
No matter how hard he tried
Three little piggies went tripping along
To the butcher, they were the target
Who was bent on chopping these piggies up
To sell 'em at the local market
Baa baa black sheep have you any wool
Of course the answer is yes
They're sheep, that's a real silly question
Three bags full would be my guess
Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle
Didn't think cats could play an instrument
Though I've heard some play a viola
That'd be like me climbing trees, the equivalent
Jack be nimble, Jack be quick
At my age, you must be jazzing me
It's been a long time since I was nimble or quick
Was probably just a wee tike of three
Georgie Porgie pudding and pie
The current trend is over eating
No wonder obesity is rampant in the world
Bad habits our kids we've been teaching
Mary had a little lamb
She also had a goat
Mary's been messing with the animals again
Naughty Mary, I here do quote
© Jack Ellison 2015
Mary had a little lamb
The birth was quite a sensation
It should go down in the history books
She needed a lot of sedation
Three little piggies went tripping along
To the butcher, they were the target
Who was bent on chopping these piggies up
To sell 'em at the local market
Baa baa black sheep have you any wool
Of course the answer is yes
They're sheep, that's a real silly question
Three bags full would be my guess
Jack be nimble, Jack be quick
At my age, you must be jazzing me
It's been a long time since I was nimble or quick
Was probably just a wee tike of three
Georgie Porgie pudding and pie
The current trend is over eating
No wonder obesity is rampant in the world
Bad habits our kids we've been teaching
Mary had a little lamb
She also had a goat
Mary's been messing with the animals again
Naughty Mary, I here do quote
© Jack Ellison 2015
It's no wonder that old dame knew not what to do,
If she thought she could raise kids alone in a shoe.
She proved after the second
She was overly fecund,
Maybe Mother Goose reckoned she'd have child support, too.
What nursery rhyme's gayer, I'm asking you, bub,
Than the one that has three grown men sharing a tub?
Was it their sexual orientation,
Or merely water conservation,
And they were all charter members of the Sierra Club?
gardening back the perennial shade,
no time or reason to follow these
months into their graves.
wandering whale songs through a nantucket
wheather vain storm in the plow and bury
the fishnet parable.
a sower of seeds carries the mythic legend,
the horse drawn mantle and the weary knuckle.
but let the sea drown in its own sorrows,
for there is a harbor of stories in the dry
leaf bed of an old teacup on the porch.
the ambient light of the colodial silver
half moons, half shiverers and half
tumbles down.
an orchard of angelic promises in the
sky nurtures and gathers every wool
capped stone.
near polar latitudes along the borders
of a window pane freeze and keep out
every unknown stranger.
biblical knocking... pulling.. tears open
and lets enter the seagulls half hearted charms.
Multiplication is vexation,
Division is as bad;
And that’s why they invented the calculator
I live on trees
I eat green leaves
I crawl and crawl and hide
From the Beings in unfurled leaves
I sing with the wind in silver moonlight
And wait and wait till the time is right
To enter the Chrysalis and get some sleep
To bear two wings and paint them bright
I wait and wait and never make a sigh!
Then break the cocoon and fly real high
I flap and flap and flap my wings
Embrace new life and wonders of the sky
Fancy a drink from the leaves of a flower?
Or a ride on Breeze to a nearby tower?
Wait and wait till the time you are ready!
Work on your wings and make them steady!
°____________________________°
Nursery Rhyme
Paghunda Zahid
Why did little Tommy Tucker
Have to sing for his supper?
Did he stammer and stutter
To merit just bread and butter?
And what miscreant oaf
Would then give him a loaf
But nary a knife to cut through it?
Didn't Tom have enough strife
In his life with no wife,
Or did fat spread on starch
Help him chew it?
IT AIN'T NURSERY RHYMES
(It's haiku by Shiraito)
Three little kittens
jumped over the candle stick
Mama goose is sick
peas porridge is hot
can't get to heaven on a watermelon rind
Mama goose is loose
old man Humpty Dumpt
sat in a corner on his rumpt
squashed a big spider
hear the mourning dove
got a big hole in my glove
I might be in love
one potato two potato
twenty-six potato more
Susie's a floozie
come ride on my swing
you can sit right on my lap
we'll pump to the sky
SHIRAITO aka vee bdosa the doylestown poet
aka ron wilson
Let's go to park
Daily by walk
We shall talk
of birds in flock
and dogs that bark
Until the dark
Let's go to Lake
To see the crakes
the floating ducks
and their darling chicks
And sing quack quack quack
till the sky goes black
Get out of the chair
Let's go somewhere
to breath fresh air
and to do some dare
For nature is a cure
if only we care
March-14-2021
Porgie George, Little Jack Horner
Kissed a girl off in a corner
They were all thumbs and made her cry
Offed in prison, absent mourners.
Peter Piper, Peter Peter
Killed a girl and tried to eat her.
The cops dispatched each with a shell;
They help Charon, Limbo’s greeters.