Best Hilariously Poems
When no one else is around
I AMUSE MYSELF while sitting down
And bring myself tons of joy when I pretend to be
A stand-up comedian amusing all my friends.
I amuse myself then.
Nothing else to do while sitting in the pews.
I might as well count my blessings, and
AMUSE myself while confessing.
When I'm sleeping I amuse
Myself with my nightmares as I'M screaming
Frighteningly amusing me.
I amuse myself with fun and jokes GALES of
Laughter thereafter. FUNNY patrols the halls
Of speckled jest. HA! I amuse myself at my
Own request.
When muscles are weak from laughters cause
I amuse myself with my APPLAUSE.
I create a funny story recite it to myself
And listen to my own glee.
I amuse myself with peals of SPASTIC
HILARITY. With tricks and folly it's all the
Same. I amuse myself with silly games
At the end of the day I'm amused by the moon
As it sits beneath its HALO laughing quietly
At me
HILARIOUSLY amusing me.
Categories:
hilariously, funny, hilarious, moon, muse,
Form:
Villanelle
While cleaning house I over heard the Trolls talking down below.
There was to be a battle in the grove, between a bear and a Troll.
They said this would be the end, to beat all ends, as only one would win.
Well, I’m a mother… so this worried me… on how this would all end.
A Troll and a Bear… fighting…I feared nothing good could come of that.
So, I had to find a way to come between them, to stop them in their tracks.
I talked to the Trolls, who said: this was a thing they… simply… had to do.
In fact, they said they’d all go, and would cheer it on, till it was finally through.
They left when I wasn’t looking, and I had to be there to stop it… so I ran.
The battle would be in the Bear groves where the bully frogs all live.
First I tripped over a root, breaking my shoe, so barefoot… I continued on.
Then I fell into the creek, coming up with mud everywhere, all around.
Brambles caught my shirt tearing my sleeve, but I certainly, wouldn’t give up.
I’ll admit, that Panic does some strange things, as I continued… to… speedup.
Watching where I was going would have been a really good thing, I agree.
But, I ran into the grove, a mad woman, with pepper spray in my grasp, you see.
Low and behold, I’d been wrong! There was a card game quietly going on.
The bears and the Trolls in their best clothes: and all sat there, giving a yawn.
It then dawned; this was a poker game of high stakes, which I had come upon.
The bully frog referees and everyone looked at me, like my mind was totally gone.
Actually, that’s probably right... Maybe, with worry… I truly had… gone mad.
Quietly I sat down, to watch the game… until the bear won it all… how sad.
Embarrassed, I tried to quietly sneak out: very quickly, you can be assured.
Low and behold, I ran straight into a tree… getting their attention, for sure.
Laughing hilariously, one of the Trolls picked me up, and carried me home.
He said, he was afraid for my health, should I be allowed to further roam.
They were right of course, but my mind will be better by tomorrow morn
You’ll see… I’ll prove it… when my next new poem is born…
Categories:
hilariously, adventure, fantasy, funny, imagination,
Form:
Light Verse
Silly it is, to take life seriously -
Better for us to take it hilariously;
Silly it is, to carry the weight of unwanted pressure,
When life itself, is meant to be lived with pleasure.
Silly it is, to let words of others, affect you -
Better for us to just let them flow through;
Silly it is, to want to be thought of, as perfect,
When our beauty lies in being perfectly imperfect.
Silly it is, to get over-worked and stressed -
Better for us to take it slow, with a rest;
Silly it is, to expect recognition and respect,
When our own needs, we often neglect.
Categories:
hilariously, silly,
Form:
List
The Day Baklava Bent the Fork
By: Moji Agha
April 15, 2010
On this taxing day on Earth,
I finally saw with my own physical eyes,
in one hilariously sweet moment,
the sticky triumph of baklava over the fork.
The formerly cocky fork,
his erect ego bent,
finally learned what it means to be hard, or not.
The triumphant baklava, however,
wondered if age on a lonely shelf
hardens even the sweetest of the sweet.
I wonder:
Whether she also wondered, what it means to be tough
on this warming taxing day,
on this dying blue goblet: my Mother Earth?
Is my mother's sweet heavily taxed heart finally hardening?
Has she taken the fork in the road
that ends in hard, rather than sweet?
Or alas, was it that the soft-hearted fork
had no choice but to cry bent tears
mourning the death of softness
of sweet hearts?
I hear the wind of "what is" cry:
For whose out-of-balance baklavas and forks do the bells toll, especially today?
Categories:
hilariously, bereavement, candy, conflict, earth,
Form:
Narrative
Words
Words make verses and rhymes.
Expressions of my mind
have been with me throughout time.
Rhyme and reasoning
Words with grammatical seasoning.
They can hurt you
or nurture you.
My words can be uplifting
life shifting,
even spiteful,
some needing decrypting.
They can be soul searching
thought provoking and
soul cleaning
Put your thinking cap on and decipher
my meaning.
The words can touch your heart
And hit that just right spot,
to make you think without a blink
and giving a wink
to the person who used the ink
to print the words
you’ve just heard
too open your soul
to help you gain or loose control.
Vowels, consonants making words and phrases.
Some may garner praises.
Some eloquent, some raw, some poised some powerful
and some hilariously crazy
may make the sleep push up daisies.
Words on war, words on peace
Words of the decease.
Words of suffrage
from women wanting passage
to be an individual.
Words of bravery endurances
Words challenging occurrences.
Words about our favorite people
Words about people worshiping under the pointed steeple
Words about people and faraway places.
Words about different races.
The words are sometimes the same.
Some bring thoughts of possibility
Some may bring shame
Still expressions of caring and sharing
Some soul searching and soul bearing.
So read my subjects, adjectives, pronouns and verbs,
and formulate your own expressive words.
Give access to your thoughts and feelings,
because words can be very appealing and revealing.
Categories:
hilariously, humorous, endurance,
Form:
Tail-rhyme
There's nothing funnier than a cross-eyed chicken
With legs the size of your arm
The Chicken Emporiums would sure love to know
The name of this progressive farm
Aside from the unnerving cross-eyed feature
The implications are really immense
Imagine a leg on your plate so humongous
You wouldn't know where to commence
The cross-eyed feature might cause some concern
If the patrons viewed this poor old bird
Before it was rendered suitable for your gullet
It sure looked hilariously absurd
The cross eyes were caused by trying to eject
A super sized extra large egg
Probably gave the poor brave bird a hernia
Before passing it, for mercy it begged
Such is the way of us civilized humans
Thinking of our bellies all day
Paying no attention to these cross-eyed chickens
As they dance to the hen house ballet
© Jack Ellison 2015
Categories:
hilariously, humorous,
Form:
Quatrain
Lady bird, lady bird, why thou sings so beautifully
When other had got their voice cracked in the noon?
Do you sing of peace or lost love?
You have bottled my heart with your adverbial voice
Tending the grains in my garden to peace whilst they clap
Thou have undressed the grasses of the field with your song
Your muse perching from tree to tree
The leaves dances merrily in their branches
The air in their wonderful world rejoice
Thou advertises their motions and worth
The sky clapping brightly in justification
Of your undying voice of historical flight
Hold on miss independent and repeat to my ear
The last line of the song you sang
It sounded so sweet to my soul
The meaning of your heart beat
thou sings like a preacher on the altar of love
With a rekindled voice radiating the soul
The wind trumpet hilariously whilst the tree dances
Oh lady bird, thou make my heart beautiful
Clamouring for the lost vegetable of my life
Tell me what thou sing of that i may join
In the perfection of my glowing bed which
Shows me the important of good neighbourlines.
Categories:
hilariously, art,
Form:
Narrative
A place constructed in scents and colours
but walled by the bile of human character.
Chilling air leaving behind an itchy mind
and everything good in it, possesses a side effect.
A holy temple and a war zone are mixed bred
where the heart beats, jumps and relaxes in every minute;
where freedom is bagged and heavily conditional
and liberty, long been under serious medication.
The theaters are good narrators of its reality
b’cos every nice countenance and pleasant gesture
is a product of a well dedicated rehearsal,
hilariously crafting good times out of a certain time table.
The wind of joy crosses this dwelling
on its way to nature’s conference
but avoids the same road on its way back
as the red antenna signals its usual danger.
An Indian slave enjoys more freedom
and a hundred times liberty is experienced within a prison’s walls
than this place, merely existing to satisfy reality’s fame.
If this is a home- hell is an empire of peace.
Categories:
hilariously, anger, anxiety, bullying, environment,
Form:
Free verse
Kevin and friends went sightseeing
His friends lengthened their walking stride
Kevin couldn’t keep up, his pace wasn’t agreeing
It looks like his legs were securely tied
The Lad stumbled in his walk
Twirling his legs with many intricate movements
Suddenly he took a temporary block
To check if there could be an improvements
Turning and casting his eyes around
On any one watching his funny walk
Kevin briskly went down
Upon what he saw he was perturbed and shock
Just a little tiny stone
Thwart his stalwart move and slight swagger
And kept him dangling all alone
And like a drunken fellow he stagger
Kevin went sightseeing with a pebble in the shoe
Tiny as it was it affected his ability to walk and run
Hilariously! He wore a distinct pair of socks, one black! One blue!
Awful! Kevin didn’t have much fun
Having Sin conscience in your life
Is like having a Pebble in your shoe
Get rid of the Pebble! And Christ ends your strife
To find rest point to the Cross, and he’ll see you through
Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water-Hebrew 10:22
Categories:
hilariously, addiction, bible, character, christian,
Form:
Quatrain
There's nothing funnier than a cross-eyed chicken
With legs the size of your arm
Kentucky Fried Chicken would sure love to know
The name of this progressive farm
Aside from the unnerving cross-eyed feature
The implications are immense
Imagine a leg on your plate so big
You wouldn't know where to commence
The cross-eyed feature might cause some concern
If the patrons viewed this poor old bird
Before it was rendered suitable for your gullet
It looked hilariously absurd
The cross eyes were caused by trying to eject
A super sized extra large egg
Probably gave the poor bird a hernia
Before passing it, for mercy it begged
Such is the way of us civilized humans
Thinking of our bellies all day
Paying no attention to these cross-eyed chickens
Trying not to end up on our plate
© Jack Ellison 2014
Categories:
hilariously, humorous,
Form:
Quatrain
He was a charmer,this bachelor bunny.
The girls thought he was hilariously funny.
He'd go hopping into their briar patch.
Quite a few succulent carrots he'd snatch.
But the girl bunnies,they didn't seem to mind.
In the rabbity world he was quite a find!
One day he showed up in the valley.
He was hungry so he didn't dilly-dally.
Then one little lady took him something sweet.
She acted demure,despite those big feet.
Now the other girl bunnies were mad and jealous.
Cos' in her pursuit she was really quite zealous!
She'd decided this lop-eared boy would be hers.
He was just the type bunny the lady prefers.
But he indeed had another plan.
He grabbed her carrots and off he ran.
A confirmed bachelor bunny he would stay.
But he would be back another day.
for Carol Brown's contest"Bunny Rabbits"
Categories:
hilariously, animals, fantasy, girl,
Form:
Couplet
Troll Lake was slowly filling, after the dam and bridge were finally built.
But, it was close to the city, and kids were coming nightly, without relent!
Bad things were going to happen, if we didn’t stop those, partying fools.
The Trolls scared most away, but the wilder ones returned, definitely not cool!
With all the fun and hardy partying, they weren’t even close, or ready to resign.
Then our actor Trolls came home, with the paparazzi tagging along, behind.
They kept lurking around bushes, and we smelled disaster, coming really soon.
So we put up a sign, ‘No Trespassing! Danger! Creature From The Black Lagoon!’
They all laughed hilariously, not believing it could remotely, be possibly true.
So we had to devise a plan, to scare them off, that’d added a wallop, to the boo!
Now, as the lake had filled we’d found we’d acquired a Monk Frog, on a lily pad.
He helped us with meditation, yoga lessons, and advise… that was totally rad.
He told us of his Gold Fish friend, who thinks he’s a shark and would happily fight.
But to all those skinny-dippers, his nibbles had been like, the bark without the bite.
So we borrowed Grandma Trolls’ Large false teeth, adding more bite to his delight.
Someone got bit, as a Troll jumped up, snarled, and lunged after the kids in the night.
This made the kids scramble wildly for their lives and to protect their manly parts.
They say, they ran all the way home, still naked, till they hit their own front doors.
The Police found them to book them, for trespassing, and basically running amuck.
The paparazzi, got it all on tape, selling it to the newscasters, so all were in luck.
The film of the creatures’ outline coming out of the water, made it more profound.
And rumors ran like wild fire, to not swim in our mysterious lake, so spellbound.
Even the paparazzi, backed off, wondering what other dangers, might be around.
It’s amazing how great we could be, when we get together, and our ideas abound.
PS. A happy, little shark patrolled the lake... nightly, from then on…
Categories:
hilariously, adventure, fantasy, funny, imagination,
Form:
Light Verse
Children cheerily carousing,
Hilariously giggling with glee,
Immersed in impish imaginations,
Living life abundantly.
Daring darlings darting about,
Relishing rumble-tumble play,
Enjoying their energetic endeavors,
No thought of slowing down today.
Picture perfect pint-sized playmates,
Laughing, leaping with all their might,
Activating creative juices,
Youthful fantasies taking flight.
Innocent babes not yet befuddled by
Nagging fears and worries,
Grabbing hold of life's good times, making memories.
4/2/12
Categories:
hilariously, childhood, happiness,
Form:
Acrostic
Definitely dealing delicately in dense danger.
Peculiarly perplexing poking pioneers of pride.
And catching coding cautions
When windy weather was wasted warming
Worries with a whistle when we were
Watching winter whizzing by.
Then there's the spring of things when it comes.
Every floral pattern that exist you're thinking
Pastels, every lavender laughs hilariously
After me
Every yellow yelling yes, yippi!! That's the
Thought. Twist thrice, then twice. Toward
Thursday thirsting for more.
Be at ease. Winter's worries warning
Wound and wounded ready to be astounded.
You have found it.
My wounded heart made of art.
The cause is in store, instead forge ahead.
Categories:
hilariously, weather, winter,
Form:
Alliteration
this is for all the DECENT ladies out there...
i dont know about you, but im sick of being second choice to skeezy women
i dont know about you, but when i have a boyfriend i just get sick of livin
i dont know about you, but i know about me
and this girl here,shes sick of the pleas
sick of the ********, sick of the crap
sick of all the "friends" who talk behind my back
sick of it all, sick of everything
and with this feeling, positive im supposed to bring?
im sick of being told "its my outlook on life"
youre so negative, you make your own strife
i dont know about you, but its not MY atatood
it all the ugliness in this sick twisted world
and i dont know about you, but im fed up
i dont about you but i give up
i dont know about you, but im done feeling the way i do
and i dont know about you, but then again i think i do
you pick yourself apart, about all your flaws
and when they cheat and lie, it just instills that further,its a law
i dont know about you, but i think i do
you're the girl, much like myself
with a good heart and a bad sense of health
build us up, tear us down
i dont know about you, but i really think i am going crazy
i dont know about you, but i think theyre all lazy
too lazy to try, too lazy to care
too lazy to give a ****, but the energy shows up when in satans lair
no more loyalty, to get kicked in the teeth
no more "friends" who just make you weep
no more crap, and no more forgiving
no more forgetting and NO MORE RE LIVING.
im not settling, i have enough of "so-so" to last my whole life
and i dont know about you girls, but it ends tonight.
we stop picking ourselves apart, we stop blaming ourselves
we stop thinking our little "flaws" ar why they did this
when its about someone else
its about them, the people they choose to be around
and quite frankly, before id be around THEM id be buried in the ground.
alive.
yes i hate them that much
and i dont know about you, but i have had enough
i wont blame myself, when skeezy outdoes classy
i wont blame myself for the hilariously tacky
things i see, on a daily basis
and i dont know about you
but i too, can fake it.
see its harder for me,to be mean like you all are
im not built that way, and being mean hurts my heart
so no i cant do the revenge thing
but what i can do is protect myself again
i dont know about you, but its long overdue
i DO know about you...because i AM you.
you are not alone.
Categories:
hilariously, america, betrayal, celebration, change,
Form:
ABC